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There was a young lady from Bude, A boy in a patriots manner, A young lady from Cincinnati A certain young man of Kirkham A round-the-world traveler named Ann, The army recruit, Mary Cass, That left a bare patch on the front. He kissed her and call her his pet; Tattooed, gothic script, there arrayed; A flat-chested lady named Krupp, There once was a Renaissance man The discerning old Bishop of Ewing, She'd a beer can tattooed on her butt, She admired his whatchamadink, A Wrexham tattooist called Ken (Tony Ben - old Labour MP)
Said a certain sweet red-headed siren, A girl with designs on her man, T G I F tatoos A flat-chasted lady named Brown A confession I must make; it's true -- I was courting a girl from the West I'm pleased to report that you're blessed The answer to this I know quick But if I knew that she was getting one, Good guesses from all four of you; Nude Karen caused more than a ripple That nipple pierce was just a ploy; Now, Karen, I don't want to grouch; An au courrant lad, name of Hans, Nowadays, to impress a young chick, A clit stud would suit me just fine I went to get me a tattoo, I've heard from a friend of a friend With all of that metal insertion, These days, on must come to grips Punching of holes in your bits, I once pierced a hole in my nose; A dick in your nose, I suppose A lady with multiple piercings Last night the ring in her nip Now I will pierce your sweet nips More pleasures you need? Then come here There was a young man from Beijing, Those people who wear a nose ring -- You don't fancy a Prince Albert ring, The Moonies are at it again. There was a young cockster named Ken Next door is the chic earring store; Some folks now will pierce anything -- An exotic young lass in Big Springs My girlfriend has rings and the lot A lady with multiple piercings Her boy friend gave our niece Teresa, A young tattoo artist named Sam A lady with multiple piercings, Think of the pleasure you'll bring, There was a teenager named Maggie, Why on earth do some young people pierce There was a young girl with a pretty-ass, And when she had wiped off her bung, Here, folks, is a brand new fast food: A bear taking a dump asked a rabbit, At the whorehouse, old handyman Watts Said the Duke to the duchess of Chypre, Said the Duchess, "Well yes, I daresay, I only drink water with gas; While watching some tragical farces,
Who bar-hopped one night in the nude.
When she woke up next day,
There was hell to pay,
'Cause when stewed she got screwed and tattooed.
--- Anon
In summer gets tanner and tanner.
With some pieces of tape,
A clear day at the Cape,
Now displays The Star Spangled Banner.
--- Tom Patton P0510Q
Liked hearing the rain go pitti-patti.
Her lover did too,
And when they would screw,
He'd tap a tattoo on her titti-tatti.
--- G2680
Took inordinate pride in his bum.
What was surely unique
Was the fact that each cheek
Was tattooed with the face of his mum.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Shacked up with a Tokyo man.
She was diddled and swived,
And her baby arrived
With its bottom stamped: MADE IN JAPAN.
--- Grand Prix Lim 891 G0690
Found the physical test she must pass
Required checks in the nude,
But she's such a prude
She had panties tattooed on her ass.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun
She told the MD, "I'll be blunt.
Do your work. I don't care,
But if you should stare,
I'll pee in your face from my cunt!"
--- Arnie Schoenbrun
A virgin so pure, he would get.
He stripped off her kit,
Then read what was writ
On her abdomen: "This space to let."
--- Tiddy Ogg
A full list of charges displayed.
You bet that he cursed
But he's fit now to burst.
So grudgingly, up the man paid.
--- Tiddy Ogg
With fucks from the back, was fed up.
So she tattooed her front
Just an inch from her cunt,
With advice that this side be turned up.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0511
Who modeled his conduct on Pan.
"I will" was tattooed
On the tip of his rood
And "I will if I must" on his can.
--- G1009
Observed that his nun had tattooing,
So loathsome and crass,
On her belly and ass,
That he wore his dark glasses while screwing.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024 G1106
For she didn't know what else to put.
On her chest she had Cyril
Having sex with a squirrel
And each one was missing a nut.
--- Barbara Cunningham P9506
So he bought her a coat made of mink.
In extreme gratitude,
She had his name tattooed
On her snatch in indelible ink.
--- Jane D Hughes P9208
Used to draw little pictures on men;
Sometimes a still life,
Or another man's wife,
Or, once in a while, Tony Ben.
--- Michael Palin
"Young sailors are cute, I must try one!"
She came home in the nude,
Screwed, stewed, and tattooed
With lewd pictures and verses from Byron.
--- L1536A
Said, "I will do what I can
To tattoo his skin,
Both outside and in."
But he spotted her needles and ran!
--- Jan Sand
On my toes help me put on my shoes,
That I once reversed.
Now my Toes Go In First;
For my heels this is really good news.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Was fucked in the ass by some clown.
So she tattooed her back
In event of attack,
With advice that this side be placed down.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0908
I have just one small tattoo --
It seldom shows,
My tiny red rose --
Too bad I can't show it to you!
--- Kaylin
Who had a tattoo on her chest.
'Twas a portrait of Gaza
And each one who has her
Says: "Blimey, love, pull down your vest!"
--- Kevin Hale Q
With a heart-shaped tattoo on your breast.
Inside is inscribed
My name. You proscribed
The design when I pleasured your nest.
--- Anon
Cause I've seen every inch of this chick
No skin's gone unseen
All around and between,
So I'm positive this is a trick.
--- Anon
I'd recommend this for a fitting one:
On front over the hole,
It'd say "This one's for pole."
On her ass would read "The shitting one!"
--- Anon
Such interesting locations too.
But all of you're wrong;
You can look all day long,
And you'll never find my tattoo.
--- Anon
By tying me up like a cripple,
And rubbing her cunt
All over my front,
Then piercing both of my nipples.
--- Anon
My plans for you, you will enjoy;
At the costume party
You'll look really smarty,
When I bring you as my pull toy!
--- Anon
At the party I'll sit on the couch.
Won't go on a bender;
These nipples are tender;
If you pull me I'll simply scream YEEOOOWWWWCCCCHHHH!
--- Anon
Had it pierced there right under the glans,
With a tiny gold ring
And a bell that went ding
When approaching the G-spot of Anne's.
--- Tutta Gioia
You'd need rings in your nose, or your wick --
Whereas Bessie don't care
If there's gray in your hair,
Or even whether you come quick!
--- Anon
And the pain...they say is devine.
A little gold stud
Adorning my bud,
And such pleasure will soon be mine.
--- Jules
But instead got a piercing anew.
Now I find it essential
To be vice-presidential,
For I've got me a dick chain-y, too!
--- Treyhutt
That the latest most up-to-date trend
Is for piercing one's privates.
I don't think I try it;
I don't want a leaky big end.
--- Peter Wilkins
This is file ntm
Let's hope for a healthy aversion
To being out when
A storm's coming in;
Lightning might make a diversion.
--- Karen
With girls having studs in their lips,
Not to mention their tits,
And their tongues and their clits,
And blokes on their todgers have clips.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Be it nipples, noses, or clits;
Some think it's a wheeze,
To look like Swiss cheese;
The thought scares me out of my wits.
--- Jayne
It swelled up -- so do you suppose
A dick would do the same?
If so, what a shame;
It makes it much harder for blows.
--- Gis
Might make a new thrill, but who knows?
When the mucous gets thick
Around that thick prick,
A thunderous blow I'd propose.
--- Tutta Gioia
In all of my favorite, dear things:
One in each tit,
And one in her clit,
It's so much nicer than just earrings!
--- Blowcephus T9712
Fouled up with the one in his lip.
Their embarrassment spread
As they erupt from the bed
To the car for the hospital trip.
--- Tiddy Ogg
And your moistly damp pink inner lips;
Insert studs of fine gold;
Give you pleasures untold,
As I lick you and fondle your hips.
--- Peter Wilkins
And gyrate on my quivering spear;
For the stud in my knob
Is magnetic; it throbs
And will take you to heaven, my dear.
--- Peter Wilkins
Who pulled from his watch a small spring.
He couldn't decide
Where the thing should reside,
So he fashioned a lovely nose ring.
--- Mizzou Lew
They must have their brains in a sling.
It seems that their snot
Would likely get caught
On that little inside stud thing.
--- Anon
Hanging right at the end of your thing?
It's supposed to be hot,
Though tried it, I've not.
Wear your jewel, just like a king.
--- Jules
But this guy must be in some pain
There's some bit that's gone --
(Perhaps it's clip-on?)
So you cannot yank this guy's chain
--- Anon
Whose gal would forget to say when;
He'd cut one more notch
Alongside her crotch
To mark that he'd scored once again.
--- Armand E Singer 566
They've pierced ladies' ears by the score.
They pierce them for free
Where anyone can see;
They do labia behind the back door.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0505
Tongues, even nipples have rings --
But piercing his tool?
He must be a fool --
He might as well tattoo his thing!
--- Kaylin Brandon
Has rings on her nipples and things;
For her dude she's so hot,
That the gold on her twat
Plays "jingle bells" when the bell rings.
--- Anon
Adorning the folds of her twat.
My tool, once quite hard,
Is now wimpy and scarred.
I guess a gold digger, I'm not.
--- Anon
Wore navel and eyebrow and ear things.
During sex they would squeak
With a rhythm and peak
At the same time as you and the bedsprings!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Many rings, studs and such-like to please her.
But one day of course,
All the magnetic force
Meant we found her stuck fast to the freezer.
--- Tiddy Ogg a
Added body-piercing to his scam.
Went to school for this skill,
Where he learned where to drill --
You should see the final exam!
--- Kaylin
Had exhausted her budget for earrings.
She tried peddling her gash,
To generate cash,
But was asked to do too many queerings.
--- Mido T9711
As you flick your tongue stud at his thing.
The encircling powers
Of golden love showers,
A piercing praise many do sing!
--- S&M
Whose britches were dirty and baggy.
Her attitude odd;
Tongue pierced by a rod,
And her hair was purple and shaggy.
--- Observer
Their bodies? 'Twould bring me to tears.
When I was a lad,
I thought it was bad
Enough making holes in the ears.
--- Tiddy Ogg
And her habits were neat but invidious.
She would wipe with a taper
Of scented blue paper,
Since she was so very fastidious.
--- L1515
Of the clingers that thereunto clung,
She would singe off the hair
That had sprouted down there,
And would lick her twat clean with her tongue.
--- L1516
MacSycophant burgers! They should
Help you to get down,
And get your nose brown,
Yes, boy, they are ass-lickin' good.
--- Anon
"Does shit stick to your fur as a habit?"
"No" said the hare,
It is really quite rare!"
So the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.
--- Scott Hendricks
Would make up the customers' cots.
And when harlots were through,
Just for something to do,
He would lick out their assholes and twats.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1300
"Now, canpaper's grand for a wiper,
But I don't give a damn for
This new-fangled camphor-
And-menthol impregnated paper."
--- L0688
Plain bum-wad's all right in its way.
But there's nothing so grand,
As some leaves, or your hand,
When you're out in the woods for a day."
--- L0689
The bubbles, they tickle my ass.
Sensation so seismic,
It's nearly orgasmic;
I almost get there, but alas!
--- Anon
The audience had a catharsis.
Instead of real tears,
They wept with their rears,
Which proves what catharsis my arse is.
--- L0699
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