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That Viagra stuff is a curse! Viagra makes all fellows feel good, What once was more valued than gold, "The end of the world!" growled old Bill, This pill makes me harder down there. Viagra kick-back doesn't come up, "Viagra is now second best," Viagra is now number two; An old impotent fellow from Borth, Poor folks -- we got all we need; Since a honeymoon failure can miff one, I hear they have started a test run Our energy level's been juiced; Viagra, the little blue pill; This is just what you do A curvaceous housewife from Rhyll, Viagra, that drug of renown, There once was a man from Devizes, The chemists resolve never drifted, I've read in October's edition If you want to feel a bit safer Viagra really is great, If you ain't tried Viagra, don't smirk. "Laying the table", at the home of the Peels There was an old lecher named Boone, When in Pisa, a mishap vehicular A sex therapist's mournful lament, To men who are 'over the hill', Invited upstairs, once again it "I'm annoyed," an old reprobate stated, Your insurance allows you just eight, Viagra can cure a 'small' prob; So this stuff stiffens your dick? When Libby can't seem to CAJOLE, You are not a real man anymore? With erectile dysfunction, a sick Try Viagra, it worked for Dole; The newest of all male corrections, Bob Dole, a Senatorial rover, While my dear wife was cuting coupons, Honeymoon by the falls of Niagara, Viagra from Pfizer's a pill; Viagra -- The Fountain of Youth. Hooray for Senator Dole! The Senator's prostate was cut, He nails her now on the floor; Because of that new pill, Viagra, There once was a matron named Kate, (Not daring to leave love to fate)
With wit, a broad sees dependence His old cock was wrinkled and soft; An aging Hollywood director, There was an old fellow from Nome Lil married a rich old geezer On Viagra was old man Muldoon A middle-aged track star named Walter, There was an old man of Brazil, No longer am I just a talker; I'm an old man, tired and jaded; Viagra's made quite an advance Old man sought physician advisor, An aging Lothario, Prewitt, She thought right in bed I would hop, A little old man named Kincade In the pitch black dark of the mill Though not young, I am spry and frisky, Young lady meets gent whose much older, An elderly gent we call Andy,
The cost alone can drain a purse!
And if taking iron;
This stuff, don't be tryin';
Pointing north is just the worst!
--- Anon X
Just as any fine medicine should.
But the gals sweet refrain
Is, "We're shortchanged again!
Why not something to wake up our pud?"
--- Tom Patton P0203
Lay shriveled and useless and old.
But a blue little pill
Has caused it to fill.
When I poke 'er, I hope I won't fold.
--- Ray Hemphill
Once Gabriel's trumpet was still.
"The self-righteous cast
Could not let is last,
Now that we have the Viagra pill."
--- A N Wilkins P9811
My wife is a bitch; I don't care!
These drugs aren't dope;
They allow me to cope.
The green one here, even grows hair.
--- Irish
Since Medicaid won't slack pick up
Of outrageous cost,
One pill ten bucks lost;
Erection side not for hard up.
--- Karen
Said Bruce after taking the test.
He was over the hill,
Then he took the new pill,
Now his pecker peaks over his vest.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0303
A new drug came out of the blue.
Pierre took a dose;
His wife says it's gross,
But his pecker's now tucked in his shoe.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0303
Took Viagra, as his doctor set forth.
When his iron was blended,
('Twas not recommended)
His pecker would always point north.
--- Squeaky TP9807a
So why should we help them plant seed?
Give them the pill?
I don't think I will;
For who foots the bill when they feed?
--- Darren
They've improved an invention so, if one,
Honeymooning Niagara,
Buys liquid Viagra,
He'll be happily pouring a stiff one.
--- Hugh Clary
On Liquid Viagra. When all done,
A fella will say,
At the end of the day:
"Hey, Baby, go pour me a stiff one."
--- Anon X
More middle aged ladies seduced.
More joy and elation
And more penetration;
The price of Viagra's reduced.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0303
When swallowed, it gives men a thrill.
Big deal, so will I,
Just pump till I'm dry,
And avoid paying that medical bill.
--- Deep Goat TP9807
While you are taking off your shoe;
A wafer on the tongue;
It dissolves and then some.
In minutes you're ready to screw!
--- Paul D
Who had resorted to using a dill,
Gave her husband Viagra.
Now he comes like Niagara
With result that she's back on the pill.
--- Anon a
Proves you can't keep a real good man down --
Though his home is his castle,
He avoids all that hassle
By sneaking it out into town.
--- Arthur Deex P9807
Whose son, in him always confideses.
"You can't get an erection?
But I have the correction."
With Viagra 'The Son Also Rises.'
--- Gearhart TP9807
When through the compounds they sifted.
Each volunteer
Let out a cheer
When more than their spirits were lifted.
--- Tom Patton P9808
Of a paper with great erudition,
There's wider selection
For your next erection;
Viagra has stiff competition.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0606
By not getting caught with a chafer,
Don't run from the dance
With a tent in your pants...
Go home and then take the wafer.
--- Frank Fazed
But I hope they reduce the rate.
Ten dollars a pill
Is a very high bill
When all I do is masturbate!
--- Puff Adder
It's one tab that sure does its work!
He was harder and longer,
Long lasting and stronger.
(The THIRD time may have been a quirk?)
--- Anon
Will have acquired new meaning, one feels,
Since medic, Doc Moses,
Prescribed Viagra in doses,
Taken three times a day before meals!
--- Anon
Who took his Viagra too soon.
The hooker was late
For their mid-morning date,
And didn't get there until noon.
--- Popsicle TP9807
Spilled Viagra, a bunch in particular.
It had the effect
That tilt to correct;
Now the tower is quite perpendicular.
--- Ogni Gioia a
On the money on Pfizer is spent;
No deed now to talk,
Just go to the doc,
For his pill gets that organ unbent.
--- Bob Birch P9807
There is now the Viagra pill.
The instructions read
Lie down on the bed
And 'under the hill' you soon will.
--- Irving Superior P9808
Was my wife's urgent wish to begin it.
So I popped that new pill
To help bolster my quill,
And said, "Dear, I'll be up in a minute!"
--- NAAR P9806X
"Can't recall the last woman I dated,
But given the pill,
In future I will
Not be angry, but Viagravated."
--- Jim Weaver Collection
So each month you must pick up your date.
If she claims her head's achin',
Then that pill that you've taken
Is a waste if you don't masturbate.
--- Bob Birch P9807
It turns my inch into a knob.
But my zip it has bust,
From the trob and the trust,
That women hang round in a mob.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
And adds new life to your wick?
So if your impudent
This stuff's heaven sent.
The women, with you they will stick!
--- Funny Bone
This is file nfl
And Bob's chances seem very dole,
Viagra will bring
New life to his thing,
And finish it well, on the (w)hole.
--- Chris Papa
Does your pecker just point to the floor?
Try Viagra, old sport,
And quite soon you'll cavort
With the ladies again on the floor.
--- Anon
Chap frets with wilt in his wick.
But, Viagra he'll find,
Helps get it realigned,
Pharmaceutically trueing the dick.
--- Bob Giandomenico
It helped him to raise up his pole;
Has given old Libby
A treat in her clitty,
Right after the blue pill took hold.
--- Anon
For broken and worn out erections;
Once the pill has been taken,
You limp friend will awaken,
But don't lose the book of directions.
--- Bob Birch P9807
His penis would always flop over.
To end his dysfunction,
Took pills for his gumption,
Overdosed and he's now stiff all over.
--- Anon
A great savings idea I hit upon.
It would save me a mint
If only they'd print,
One for that pill that gives hardons.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Taj Mahal for romance there in Agra;
As an extra safeguard,
Use a pill to get hard,
Don't leave home without taking -- Viagra!
--- Joel D Ash P9808
Not Rx'd for those who feel ill.
It makes limper weenies
Look like large zucchinis.
And ladies say "Please, a refill!"
--- Irish
Viagra -- The Moment of Truth.
"Viagra the pill
From this time on will
Libidos inflate," Westheimer, Ruth.
--- Irving Superior P9808
He's on a fantastic roll.
The Viagra pill
Has brought back the thrill;
Libby says, "He put the peg in the hole!"
--- Puff Adder
Which threw his love life in a rut.
His Viagra test
Has made him the best,
And Libby now feels like a slut!
--- Frank Fazed
The table, the couch and the door,
Screaming "Wonderful luck!
We're now able to fuck!
Some more and some more and some more."
--- Arden
A man now can come like Niagara.
If a guy keeps his dick up,
His sex life will pick up.
Why soften? Why shrivel? Why sag-ra?
--- Wormdirt TP9804
Whose beau was a spry eighty eight.
When they went to Niagara,
She had packed his Viagra,
A good reason for staying up late.
--- Bob Birch P9807
Lost to a an erotic sin dance,
And straightening curves
From lost pelvic nerves,
When Viagra brigs ascendence.
--- Anon
'Twas quite hard to get it aloft.
Then he honeymooned at Niagara
And took some viagra,
And shot wads every time that he coughed!
--- Anon
Whose member required an erector,
Said to the starlet,
(A codename for harlot)
Viagra is my favorite NECTAR.
--- Norm Brust
Who married a nurse from the home.
Wed at Niagara,
Took some Viagra,
And drove his bride all the way home.
--- Cephas Harte
But the old dude just couldn't please her.
So she slipped him Viagra,
Then he flowed like Niagara,
And screwed 'til he died from the seizure.
--- Lims For Year - 01
When he went on this third honeymoon.
Morning coffee was brewing
When he started in screwing
And finished at twelve o'clock noon.
--- Bob Birch P9807
Whose performance was starting to falter,
Tried Viagra doping,
While fervently hoping
It would make him a better pole vaulter.
--- Alex Heydon P0409
Who swallowed the little blue pill.
It gave him a charge,
Made his penis grow large,
And gave all the ladies a thrill!
--- Mikey TP9901
Viagra has made me a stalker.
I'm now an old lecher
And planning to catch her,
But somebody's hidden my walker!
--- TP9804a
My memories of youth are all faded.
My cherry long gone;
I still linger on;
Viagra gives hope to the aged.
--- Bob Hunt
That's filling the front of my pants.
Get over here fast
And bring your old ass;
It might be your very last chance!
--- Anon
"I need help to get it to rise, sir."
Viagra doled out,
The result, no doubt,
Turns old spring into young geyser.
--- Chris Papa
Said, oxymoronically, "Screw it!"
Viagra had failed him,
And worries assailed him,
That never again could he do it.
--- Norm Storer
But arthritic bones tend to pop.
Viagra she fed me;
She's ready to bed me.
Could somebody lift me on top?
--- Ray Hemphill TP9804a
Took Viagra but never got laid.
At the slightest suggestion,
He has an erection,
So he hired a new young sexy maid.
--- Tom Patton P0203
An old man made history still.
Said he, with Viagra,
When he bent down to grab ya,
"Don't worry babe, I'm on the pill!"
--- Anon
Walrus-strength Viagra though is risky.
With my fifteen-inch "Post"
I'm bigger than most;
It's been hard since around nineteen-sixty.
--- Anon
Who proclaims love, STRAIGHT FROM THE SHOULDER.
She spurns his advances,
Unready for chances.
His Viagra vigor won't hold her.
--- Chris Papa
Is taking Viagra like candy.
Without good directions,
He gets tireless erections,
And the women in town think he's dandy!
--- Tim Thompson
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