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A limerick writer should be Though head-to-toe is CAP-A-PIE, In winter's cold, I'd rather be No CAPARISON for me, Some, feminine reasoning equate If two defenders tackle you, CAPITULATE. An old lecher whose name was Maurice In need of some urgent release, Unable to cough up her fees, Now we've had some good days, a few, In living life's allotted span, Today most CARCERAL places CARCERAL theories have progressed; The tower bells of the CARILLON Though loaded with worry and cark, Sweet buxom Betty would CARK Sometimes an offhand remark CARNIVORES all like to eat, Flesh-eating bears CARNIVOROUS, A drunkard in Cork, we hear tell, Old men who CAROUSE, just might When CAROUSING, from the German Chug-a-lug, The freedom to reign with CARTE BLANCHE He bought her a bottle of beer, He thought with a smile on his face, The curves of columns CARYATID Most men seem to fall to their knees You've added a new word today, Though I'm not sure that Monica was paid, A CASH COW is what we all need, Bill Gates has figured out how Disaster prophesied CASSANDRA, CASSANDRA, a seeress with pride, CASSANDRA, prophetess of doom, War's proximate cause, CASUS BELLI, When pols explain their CASUS BELLI Some say Dubya's a CAT'S-PAW, Bonefishing can really be tough CATACHRESIS, one plainly can see, Word use in error, CATACHRESIS, A CATACOMB sounds like a site Necropolis maze is a CATACOMB, She had long brown hair, that's a fact, Glacial streams down fjord-sides CATARACT, Cougar-hunting friends in Montana, The buddies thought it would be fair A coin flip by dear friend Sophie You'd like it in the CATBIRD SEAT; Red Barber was a canny old fox; Catch 22 really shares A Fed SS number you need When your in the butt end of a screw Like Sartre, I'm damned if I do! They met in a pub nearby Crewe, Norm tried to avoid the CATCHPOLE; Yes, I tried to avoid the CATCHPOLE CATECHUMEN, the child of few years, Absolutely, CATEGORICAL, CATTY-CORNER it is for me, Just CATERCORNER are three; Obtuse is this CATERCORNER, The screeching that defines CATERWAUL My cat, Ozzie, has no balls; He thought his CATHEXIS would pay. This dude fell in love with his car The stand-in for another, CATS PAW,
Very thick skinned CAP-A-PIE,
Because comic arts
Beget 'tomic darts,
Rough ripostes for all world to see.
--- Chris Papa
As in a jumpsuit happily,
The street urchin thief
Hope for a quick brief
When lawyers try to cop a plea.
--- Daniel Ford
Covered and snug, CAP-A-PIE,
Or fireplace-ified,
In the warm inside,
Cuddling with my sweet Honey.
--- Chris Papa
No hat on my head there to see.
No sporty montage,
To cover pelage,
Just left to the wind, blowing free.
--- Chris Papa
With all heart but no logic great.
Men should just see the light
And forget the fight,
And willingly CAPITULATE.
--- Chris Papa
Don't let the coach you flagellate.
Just hang on to the ball
And hope for a call
Of fifteen yards 'cause one hit you late.
--- Norm Brust
Was overtaken by a sudden CAPRICE.
He grabbed his Rolodex,
Looked under "S" for sex,
And phoned his favorite "niece".
--- Norm Brust
The guy hit upon this CAPRICE.
Since he never sinned,
He'd change with the wind,
And spend a few bucks for a "piece".
--- Chris Papa
The guy, still in need of release,
Sought help of another
Capricious big brother,
And they both went down on their niece.
--- Gary Hallock
But what's a poor husband to do,
When pretty wife rapturous,
Grows tongue that's CAPTIOUS,
And shrivels his staff, as a shrew.
--- Chris Papa
The troubles that accrue to Man,
And wipe away smile,
Don't come single file,
But arrive in a long CARAVAN.
--- Chris Papa
One might consider disgraces.
Where prisoners scrounge,
Enjoy TV lounge,
And recreational spaces.
--- Chris Papa
With punishment we're no longer obsessed.
It's about rehabilitation,
An enforced "vacation"
Where the con is considered a guest.
--- Norm Brust
At Notre Dame some find peril on;
In black and white grainy,
Th visage of Chaney
Left hunchback silence in care o'Lon.
--- Daniel Ford
Noah guided his charges in ark,
To a new found seat,
With waters retreat;
Their prospects there must have seemed stark.
--- Daniel Ford
About a sole walk in the park.
Especially at night
When some masher might
Cop a quick feel in the dark.
--- Chris Papa
Will cause much grief and cark.
So watch what you write
Or someday you might
Pay the fee of some legal shark.
--- Norm Brust
Fowl, fish and animal meat,
Raw, broiled or braised,
Its virtues are praised,
As part of a diet complete.
--- Chris Papa
Not often thought herbivorous,
In berries delight,
But I find their sight
Leaves me shuddering, shiverous.
--- Daniel Ford
Spent evenings in pubs raising hell.
Carousing all night,
The world wasn't right,
But spun like a mad carousel.
--- Bob Dvorak
Find wenches, arousing lust bright.
Though spirit willing,
Flesh is not fulfilling.
They go gently into that good night.
--- Phil Kinay
You've got to empty the jug.
But the fun, you may spoil it,
If you don't reach the toilet,
Before old Nature pulls the plug.
--- Norm Brust
Does many a dictator launch.
It's only with time
Democracies climb,
The great losses of blood to staunch.
--- Daniel Ford
And thought that CARTE BLANCHE was quite near.
But he got stiff arm
And threat of gendarme,
When he tried for a pat on her rear.
--- Chris Papa
Admiring each caryatid's grace,
That he had some hope;
If live, he might grope
Each, as each was fixed to her place.
--- Chris Papa
Were seductie, so Pyggy patted.
And as to swelling,
He now tries selling
"The bulge is just a cyst hydatid."
--- Daniel Ford
When confronted with CARYATIDES.
Hours they'll stay,
All night and all day,
In hopes of a drape-lifting breeze.
--- Kitten
The CARYATIDS, in their own way,
Held roofs on their heads,
Like in buildings Feds,
They're shapely stone columns, I'd say.
--- Chris Papa
('Cause Bill reckoned she hadn't been laid)
She's selling books now.
Seems that this CASH COW
At the White House, much more than milkmaid.
--- Kitten
To milk of her profit with greed.
We all like cheese and butters
Paid for by some udders,
But careful, don't start a stampede.
--- Gary Hallock
To increase his fortune, and how.
We buy and endure
That programmed manure,
That plops from his famous CASH COW.
--- Frank
As she lay in green pachysandra,
Listening to wizard
In form of a lizard,
Who went by the name Salamandra.
--- Daniel Ford
Far future for Greeks often eyed.
She'd only one fault;
Her total gestalt
Was that her truth would be denied.
--- Chris Papa
This is file hql
Could easily clear out a room.
When she claimed that the end
Was just around the bend,
Folks figured she rode in on a broom.
--- Norm Brust
Has often seemed the truth to belie.
Evidence proffered,
Not money coffered,
Should be the cause for giving belle eye.
--- Daniel Ford
To erase that dead fish smell, try
To bring noble thought
To danger they've fraught,
Making angel out of that hell guy.
--- Chris Papa
Which surely must stick in his craw.
Where prior Prez sat,
As more of Tom Cat
Who liked every thong that he saw.
--- Chris Papa
If the water's even slightly rough.
The big one I saw
Disappeared 'neath CAT'S-PAW,
And my cast was a blind man's bluff.
--- Norm Brust
Might be the occasion for glee,
Though in its broad use
As language abuse,
It never arises from me.
--- Chris Papa
Will not do much to help your thesis.
Choosing the right words,
Splitting whey from curds,
Makes you a big cheese, rich as Croesus.
--- Daniel Ford
For grooming a pussy each night.
It clears tangles all
Or chance of fur ball,
Gets purrs, sign of feline delight.
--- Chris Papa
Often beneath a cathedral home,
Where lies the cardinal
With sins unpardonable,
Guarded by some necrophilic gnome.
--- Daniel Ford
Which fell o'er her breasts, CATARACT.
Enhancing what grew,
Romancing the view,
That she was extremely well-racked.
--- Chris Papa
Brushes of white in painting abstract,
Enhancing the view
Of the blue green hue
Where sea and mountains, tourists attract.
--- Daniel Ford
Such buddies thay shared a banana,
Killed mountain lion
That kept sheep dyin',
Causing very sweaty bandannas.
--- Daniel Ford
Taxi-derm stuffed cougar to share;
Turns soon derided,
Cougar divided,
But which end of trophy to bear?
--- Daniel Ford
Gave Bill the tail of cat trophy.
Thought Bill of his fate,
"Though shooting was great,
Souvenir is catastrophe!"
--- Daniel Ford
A position that is really neat.
But don't make the blunder
To ever sit under,
'Cause catbird poop isn't too sweet.
--- Chris Papa
Up there high in the announcer's box.
Though "Dem Bums" faced defeat,
Terms like "CATBIRD SEAT"
Eased the pain as Dodger fans took their knocks.
--- Norm Brust
And fatal frustration full bares.
Like caught in a vice
That's not very nice,
Thought that one is "caught by the short hairs."
--- Chris Papa
In searching for job, to succeed;
The CATCH 22
That will beset you:
No Job? Can't get number. You're freed.
--- Elois
And you find there is naught you can do
To get free from the chase
Between "rock and hard place",
That's when you're in CATCH 22.
--- Chris Papa
And damned if I don't? Yes that too.
For if I refuse
The option to chose,
I've chosen: it's CATCH 22!
--- Nick
But his prurient plans she soon blew.
"I think all men dubs
Who hang out in pubs."
He had found a new CATCH-22.
--- J'Carlin
To avoid paying taxes his goal.
He figured, "What for?"
Located "off-shore,"
Suns on Cayman beach with Nicole.
--- Chris Papa
And ran to Cayman with Nicole.
But you know the Feds;
They look under beds.
I just got out on parole.
--- Norm Brust
Attentive to life is "all ears."
Though silent about it,
Will soon, never doubt it,
Unexpectedly spill what he hears.
--- Chris Papa
And of classes allegorical,
The Partner's verses o
Due to humor sophomorical.
--- Daniel Ford
Obscure origin, hard to see.
Diagonal, dice,
Does not figure nice,
It's your roll, obviously.
--- Chris Papa
And old man, his dog, and a flea.
They seem somewhat stupid;
Still I, hoping Cupid
Makes room in that menage for me.
--- Joanne Gonzalez
Pronounced as though by some foreigner.
Alien caterwaul,
In folk etymol,
Is across box, kittycorner.
--- Daniel Ford
Can come from a play's "cattle call."
Disappointment's lament
Means no pay for the rent,
And contemplate career overhaul.
--- Daniel Ford
No wonder he now CATERWAULS.
I had him desexed,
And act he rejects
By voicing pitious cat calls.
--- Norm Brust
In Girl of his dreams for that day,
For drinks and a meal,
Love's profession, a deal
Designed to let him "have his way."
--- Chris Papa
Which he polished till it shone like a star.
This weird CATHEXIS
For a big black Lexus
Made him the butt of cruel jokes in the bar.
--- Norm Brust
Will suffer consequences, that law.
As to the thong thing,
A different song sing,
When Hillary connects with fat jaw.
--- Daniel Ford
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