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So joking you better not say, So have a safe trip when you fly, Giant rage that is hard to contain, Stop fanatics from having some fun? Unfortunate word that: crusade. The bombers are more than just sick; Aytollah, Coca cola, and Rickety-Rax, In limericks, it's hard to express Being half-Arab, I used to be proud, It is hard to take up the pen, It's easier now from the sky, Lady terrorists, trying to trick us, Our own terrorists' plans never jell A temblor abetted the trauma I've oft heard of that "hidden land," One cheer for the Northern Alliance, Weapons of mass destruction Oh, let me just give you the word; If one can tell day from the night, Old Dante knew life was just comic If you think he's a man of the left, Opinions are held by us each, "Our task is to sort through the lies," Dave, should he run out of luck, Souls of terrorists and their allies Far away I can hear a KABOOM! Saddam and Osama Bin Laden You may say that they're on the run, Osama Poppins, the crafty Afghani A Taliban man named Abdul These virgins are Satan in drag; Crushed concrete, red stained twisted steel. You all wish the Afghans no ill; To the hackers and spammers and pederasts, That fellow with violent urgin's, The prisoner abuse epidemic Hey Merkins, you better take fright; An Al Qaeda donkey called Kamel I know that prediction is chancey, (Warned about suicide bomber, hijackers, etc.)
Propagandizing with our best tools, September eleventh appalling, Graceful buildings so tall are now gone, Armageddon instilled in each heart, Two towers of strength in our minds, Through acts of unspeakable gloom The history books will now tell The FBI expert concludes I'd like it if someone explained Remember flight 587? A terrorist tried something new -- Right now, people's nerves are quite taut, I imagine they all stood in line Though a terrorist act may befall, The Taliban's beset with woes, John Walker Lindh's not bin Laden, The Taliban's now on the run; A fanatic whose name was Bahram Some Hindus, disciples of Charon, To end all the terror Islamic, Sleeping giant with dreams full of love, With purpose and strength, wide awake, Since airport screening suffered a lax lapse Our Trade Center fell with a roar, Abu Musab al-Zarqawi Zarqawi, praise Allah, is dead! Two ladies, quite scantily clad,
There's a guy with a knife here today.
Or a man with long beard
Had better be feared,
It's a certain they'll whisk you away.
--- Barbara Cunningham P0203
And YOU pick the time when you die.
When you conquer your fear,
You'll feel heaven is here,
And kiss all your worries good-bye.
--- Barbara Cunningham P0203
Lashing out he must fight to restrain;
Proper thought is applied,
And with right on his side,
He embarks on a vengence campaign.
--- Joel D Ash P01
Though something that I've never done,
They'd have met a quick end,
If I or some friend
Had been there and packin' a gun.
--- Anon
But it was instictively made.
So what if some find
It offensive; remind
Them "Jihad" is offensive a shade.
--- Peter Wilkins
I'd hang them all up by their pricks.
And for their foul murders,
I'd sharpen some girders,
And bleed them to death with some nicks.
--- Anon
We carry out Iran's kamakazi attacks!
With all we stand
And explode on demand,
You could say we're Ayatollah Koh-maniacs!
--- Ann Gasser P8712
How I feel about the WTC mess.
Yet, despite my grief,
It is my belief
Life goes on; I'll give it my best.
--- Christopher Anton
Shared my heritage often and loud.
But Bin Laden's a dastard,
A Satan-led bastard,
Who is better off wearing a shroud.
--- Christopher Anton
But please, dear friends, do it again.
Laden's goal's to destroy
All things we enjoy.
We can't let that lunatic win.
--- Christopher Anton
"Assisting" those others to die.
Avoiding the thrill
Of making the kill
While looking the lad in the eye.
--- John Miller
Are now wearing explosive knickers.
I believe that's absurd
And I think that I've heard
It's an excuse for strip searching trippers.
--- AA
Though they're plotting to blow us to hell;
The complex machination
Include stadia and train stations,
But they're easy to catch 'cause they smell.
--- Arthur Deex P0608
Of New Yorker's ongoing drama.
A great mystery!
Would you please tell me,
How you pulled that one off, dear Osama?
--- John Miller
Place where Osama's turbaned band
Enjoys a cave warm
Free from the swarm
Of bombs from U.S, Air Command.
--- Chris Papa
Though Taliban showed little defiance.
Not socially skilled,
Look how many they killed;
Compassion is not rocket science.
--- Tony Burrell
Is just convenient expression
To justify what
We aver it is not;
A war of naked agression.
--- David Martin
You're simply a dumb right-wing nerd.
Your lims are a fake;
You're mad and a flake.
Now I'll at your bird, flip the bird.
--- Archie
And can see what is black and is white,
He should not in his rhyme
Make fun of mass crime,
Or invoke the tired "Left-versus-Right".
--- David Martin
And Death is at times philanthropic.
To laugh at mass crime,
In prose or in rhyme,
Reduces the stress anatomic.
--- Archie
Of sense you're completely bereft.
That he should control
A party of proles,
Amounts to an out and out theft.
--- David Martin
But David is no one to preach.
Since he's claiming the right
To send me his shite,
While denying me freedom of speech.
--- Travis Brasell
Said Donne, "and find the truth that applies."
Then make our demand
With dollar in hand,
While hoping for HOT freedom fries!"
--- Travis Brasell
Might pick the wrong body to fuck.
A corpse with the smile
Of a hijacker vile,
And then even Dave would upchuck.
--- Anon
Are in for a horrendous surprise:
They'll awake -- and then dwell
In eternity's hell,
And not in, as they hoped, paradise.
--- William Nesbit P0110
Mushroom clouds in the distance doth loom.
Great squirts of gas
Shooting out of their ass.
And their balls will hang from the moon.
--- Buck
Attempted to take us a hard un.
When faced with defeat,
They took to the street,
And hid in a Syrian garden.
--- Aussie Owl
But in Arab minds they have won.
Their homes they have flitted,
Yet death they've outwitted,
Despite Georges, father and son.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Has disguising skills wholly uncanny.
His spoor's hard to spot
As an umbrella is not
What they search for in each nook and cranny!
--- Doug Harris P0502
Was flying a plane from Kabul.
After crashing thought, well,
Now I'm cooking in hell.
All that paradise talk was just bull.
--- Snaggletooth
You're poking his ass like a fag.
And your sexual gig
Was never that big,
Just barely enough for a shag.
--- Snaggletooth
These senseless "acts" beyond unreal.
All peoples must now unite.
Respond but do not incite.
To higher powers please appeal.
--- David J Stein P0110
Moslems in general, less still.
How careful you aim
In this aerial game;
Bombs still do not know who to kill.
--- Tony Burrell
This is file fwl
Infesting the Web, now add terrorists;
Into sites pornographic,
They encode their own traffic,
Instructions for killing and bomb blasts.
--- Dr Limerick 02-06-01
Now smells like some under-cooked sturgeons.
And though end was crappy,
No doubt, now, he's happy,
'Cause he earned his seventeen virgins.
--- Observer
Has turned into quite the polemic.
In the latest report,
Admiral Church will purport
That the problem was never systemic.
--- Limerick Savant
My warriors come in the night.
It's no use to hunker
Down there in your bunker;
I smuggled in pure anthracite.
--- Anon
Made poison from seed-pod enamel.
Bet he gets the right hump
When his locked-up tight rump,
Gets stuffed with more seed (but mammal).
--- Jarmo
But I, without access to fancy
Intelligence briefs,
Or dropping at eaves,
Knew terrorists, from reading Tom Clancy.
--- Dr Limerick 05-17-02
We've dredged up some Victorian jewels.
Aren't wars on terrorism
New Colonialism?
Well, at least we'll bring both roads and schools.
--- Loren Fitzhugh P0212
Twin towers first burning, then falling;
Screams heard o'er the land,
So united we stand,
Galling threat, our resolve now forestalling.
--- Joel D Ash P0111
But not freedom's torch and pylon;
Wan faces uplifted,
Our attitudes shifted,
Thoughts dwelling upon Avalon.
--- Joel D Ash P0111
Legions gather to strike at the start;
Our rampart defended,
The mundane transcended,
Each patriot plays a grand part.
--- Joel D Ash P0111
Great purpose and oneness one finds;
Togetherness soaring,
Our battle cry roaring,
This red, white, and blue issue binds.
--- Joel D Ash P0111
The Trade Center site is a tomb;
A mound of debris
So horrific to see,
Where thousands were sent to their doom.
--- Cap'n Bean P0111
Of the day the World Trade Center fell;
September eleven
Sent thousands to heaven,
But those bastards, for sure, went to hell.
--- Cap'n Bean P0111
That the plastique found packed in Reid's shoes,
Could have blown a big hole,
Causing loss of control
And a mid-ocean crash with no clues.
--- Dr Limerick 12-28-01
Why Reid sat near the back of the plane.
Is this where the tail
Was at max risk to fail
By a hole adding torque, stress, and strain.
--- Dr Limerick 12-28-01
On Long Island, it crashed burned and deafened --
Did the tail come loose
Because of the shoes
Of some zealot with ticket to heaven.
--- Dr Limerick 12-28-01
An explosive device in his shoe.
This modified brogan
Caused diversion to Logan
When they caught him with match to the fuse.
--- Dr Limerick 12-22-01
And I'll bet his subduction was not
At all kind and gentle,
But unsentimental.
As out of him, folks beat the snot.
--- Dr Limerick 12-22-01
For their turn to subdue this Einstein.
Some cheerful chat while
They stood in the aisle
And pummeled him, one at a time.
--- Dr Limerick 12-22-01
I spend every day at the mall.
Said Dubya, "Don't stop
The urge to go shop!"
So I'm answering my country's call.
--- Observer
But well then, that's how a war goes.
They're feeling the heat,
And now in retreat,
They've chose the wrong foes to oppose.
--- Observer
Even though his chances were rotten.
So let us be candid;
He's a mere Talibandit,
Who easily will be forgotten.
--- Limerick Savant
Perhaps they're sorry they begun.
Bring them to justice,
But all the truth just is
Atrocities can't be undone.
--- Tony Burrell
Was arrested in Dar es Salaam.
In a bag, the police
Were collecting each piece
Of his partner, who'd carried the bomb.
--- Cyber Geezer
Scheme with Muslims to turn our world barren.
They're so EVIL, you see...
I'm so glad that we
Wouldn't stoop to use nukes, germs, or sarin...
--- John Miller
We'll send them two presents atomic.
With Medina the first
Where the mushroom will burst;
Then Mecca for loss astronomic.
--- Hugh Clary
Peaceful slumber midst land of the dove;
Shaken out of deep sleep,
A sad pause, time to weep,
Rising anger with cause from above.
--- Joel D Ash P01
He begins all the steps he must take;
Down a road long and hard,
Even in his backyard,
With the fate of the world now at stake.
--- Joel D Ash P01
Suicide pilots caused twin tower collapse
Now steel melt should be heeded
While low line design's needed
Skyscraper era's remembered with taps.
--- Esther Koch P0110
In unspeakable carnage and gore,
At a horrible cost
To those crippled and lost;
We'll remember this day evermore.
--- Cap'n Bean P0110
Now dwells in a place more like Maui.
Relocation was done
By an air-dropped half-ton
And his mommy could not kiss his ow-ie.
--- John Miller
No more will he catch and behead
The foes of the Prophet;
So now, to get off, it
Will take some dead virgins instead.
--- John Miller
Accompanied the lad to his pad.
Does Allah deduct
The virgins he's fucked,
From those that he hasn't yet had?
--- John Miller
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