There's a question designed to perplex:
Why giraffes have such very long necks!
Is it mainly to see?
Or eat treetops for tea?
Or to have more room in dating, for pecks.
--- Prof M-G T9710

Jerome was a silly giraffe,
Who wore a disguise for a laugh.
Well, Jerome was too tall,
(Or the costume too small).
Did is cover Jerome? Only half!
--- Anon

Giraffes, yes, even the strongest,
Hang back in love's headlong conquest.
They have a motto,
Which says that they got to,
"He who giraffes last, giraffes longest.
--- Frank Davies

The giraffe, said the weary Creator,
Is not such a klutz as the 'gator.
But his legs, when he trots,
Might get tied up in knots.
Perhaps I will shorten them later.
--- Jeanne Steig P0011

If you've a long neck, I should say
You will likely get quips every day
From people more squat,
Who've elegance (not) -
"Giraffe to just stand there that way?"
--- Doug Harris P0607

There once was a lady of Derwent
Who kept a giraffe as a servant.
He would come at her call
And would polish the hall.
Her praises of him were most fervent.
--- Mary Danby - 2nd Armada

At a zoo, squeezing balls, did Miss Snatchem,
Of a well hung giraffe (what can match 'em?)
As he bolted the fence.
Said the zoo keeper -- Spence
"Please squeeze mine dear, so I can catch him!"
--- Anon

A chimpanzee liked pansies and roses
And standing in elegant poses.
When people would laugh
At her guy, the giraffe
In the air they would stick up their noses.
--- Silvia S Crockett P0105

There once was a Sportive Giraffe,
Who concocted his own Epitaph:
Here lies one whose Speed,
Is renowned, for, indeed,
He won by two Necks and a half.
--- Frolics Uncle Yule P0607

The neuropterous insect, the alderfly,
Sits squarely within the Sialidae.
His antennae and wings
And ant-lion siblings
Are entirely admired by all and I.
--- Rory Ewins Q

The alderfly, insect neuropterous,
Has wings; its relations psocopterous
Either may or may not,
Although no bug has got
Any wings that rotate helicopterous.
--- Rory Ewins Q

The Amazon jungle, they say
Has a million insects who stay
Away from our sight;
Only come out at night
When mosquitoes will drag you away!
--- Anon

Ametabola do not endure
Metamorphosis, thus are secure
In their insect identities.
Their newly-hatched entities
Are nymphs till they're fully mature,
--- Sheila B

The ladybug, there's no denyin',
Seem sweet whether crawlin' or flyin'.
But when larval, she munches
On aphids in bunches,
So her larva are called aphid lion.
--- Anon

An aphid, a terrible cheater,
Abused his poor wife, yes, he'd beat her.
But she held her own;
She was getting her bone
From a tender and caring mosquiter.
--- Anon

I'm an aphid; I eat all your crops.
I devour your green carrot tops.
And the fruit from your trees
I will happily seize.
If you don't like it, you can call the cops.
--- Mimi

A termite enjoying a beer
Asked, as the waiter drew near,
(To see if he might
Enjoy a small bite)
"Is the bar tender here?"
--- Res Ipsa

If under some cabinet glass
Is a beetle with bottom of brass,
Don't dither about it.
Come right out and shout it.
It's got an aeneous ass!

(aeneous - brass-colored)
--- Anon

Consider the beetles of dung
Whose praises need to be sung.
This industrious species
Buries animal feces,
Which all other beasts have flung.

(Smithsonian Aug 1977, page 16)
--- Joshua M. Levine P9710A

From page one of a ten-volume book,
A worm ate to the last page. It took
Seven claims statisticians
And mathematicians
To prove the sly bookworm a crook.

(bookworm lied)
--- David A Brooks

There was a young lady from France,
Who had a large bug in her pants.
She took off her clothes,
Right down to her hose.
Her date asked, "May I screw while you dance?"
--- Joe the Jester

A zoologist's daughter of Zug,
Said, "Pa, what is that on the rug?"
Cried he, "Goodness gracious!
How very vexacious,
I fear is a blood-sucking insect of the Cimex lectularius

species. (means it's a bug - McW)
--- P8204

Just before I was typing this lim,
Along on the floor it did skim,
I jumped up quite quick,
It made me feel sick,
So I squashed it and made it quite slim.
--- Anon

There once was a girl who loved bugs
And kept them in jars, cups and jugs.
She tickled their chins,
Scratched under their chins,
And carefully gave them all hugs.
--- Learning Works

Lepidopterists' biceps and thighs
Permit them a strange exercise.
Their queer avocation
And great dedication
Permit them to mount butterflies.
--- Anon

Two butterflies hung 'round a light.
He said, "Wanna?" she said: "I might.
Some foreplay would help."
So he massaged her palp;
It turned out one hell of a night.
--- Anon

A aspiring outdoorsman, Joe Gold,
When confronted with nature, was bold.
He'd take up his weapon,
A stool or a baton,
And thrash butterflies till they were cold.
--- Anon

There once was a Monarch in May,
Who fluttered around all day.
But when a blue jay
Wanted to play,
The Monarch just flew away.
--- Garrett Landon

Entomologist William P. Strugge
Dismissed the remark with a shrug.
When addressed with the query,
He thought droll, dreadful, dreary,
"What's the mating call of the Humbug?"
--- Loren Fitzhugh

To select this plant or the other,
A caterpillar just doesn't bother.
It's given no voice
In making a choice,
Which is done, of course, by its mother.
--- Anon

My very old friend, Monty Meacher,
Told me of this cell phone and it's feature.
It takes, though, some skill,
To do the bug ill,
By throwing the phone at the creature.

(cell phone noises supposed to repel bugs)
--- Tiddy Ogg

A caterpillar moved like a sloth
Till the day he turned into a moth.
Then he zoomed like a jet
To the cupboard to get
His teeth into everyone's cloth!
--- Anon

A cockroach with too many eyes
Was embarrassed in front of the guys.
He hid from the masses
In Groucho Marx glasses,
But it was not an effective disguise.
--- Tillmanator

This is file ljk

A cockroach who left a deposit,
Had just vanished into the closet.
But it later emerged
And was summarily purged.
Well, it was the same one, right?...or was it?
--- Prof M-G

I've a cockroach that sings like a thrush.
Its song fill the evening bush.
The sound of its screech
Thrills the parts you can't reach,
And that's quite an adrenaline rush.
--- Bill Wall

Scott Turner, for termites he quested;
Collecting, he rarely was bested.
Suspected of drugs,
More likely was bugs;
At the border, he was arrested.
--- Jessie Gunnard

A cricket's a little black bug
Which you find in the weave of a rug.
You needn't explain
A meaning so plain,
And you shouldn't be looking so smug.
--- Anon

The people I know always blab it --
The cricket's a bug with a habit.
When singing 'bout weather,
His legs rub together,
But I can't catch a cricket who's at it.
--- Silvia S Crockett P0106

These crickets are like water drops!
I can't wait until this one stops
That damn creaky noise!
Wish he'd get some toys.
'Cause he'll rub his legs 'til he flops!
--- Anon

Crickets make very good bait
For fish; a most fitting fate
To keep in your mind,
Once that bug you do find,
That has kept you up way too late.
--- Anon

That chirping and sound that they make
Carries well across any lake,
Where they will soon be
A fish's entree,
And the fish will be yours; that's jake.
--- Anon

The one in my ceiling in Tucson
Should properly have had his boots on.
He made such a racket,
I just couldn't hack it,
And that night lasted an eon.
--- Anon

But my rat did eat it with bliss,
And then gave me a ratty kiss.
For I caught that bug
But I didn't hug
It, my rat got it for breakfis'.
--- Anon

A cutworm with nothing to do
Was gnawing his granny in two;
She said to him, "Grimes,
Now how many times
Have I told you to cut and not chew."
--- Lims Unlimited

A fly and a moth called a pact
Together, in bed they were shacked.
I know it's absurd,
They were found by a bird.
The ending -- they sadly were snacked!
--- Anon

No creature I quite so despise
That I'm happy when one of them dies,
But I revel in glee
At the killing of three:
Moths, mosquitoes, and flies.
--- Vassar Smith P9611

Once a grasshopper (food being scant)
Begged an ant some assistance to grant.
But the ant shook his head,
"I can't help you," he said,
"It's an uncle you need, not an ant."
--- Oliver Herford

A young lady, timid and proper,
Went walking out with a grasshopper.
When she wanted to stop,
He continued to hop,
And got home before her to supper.
--- Anon

A month in the season of bugs,
Invasions of insects and slugs;
The garden infested,
The homeowner tested,
With creatures that one seldom hugs.
--- Joel D Ash

They bug you no end and they bite;
Not screened they will seldom delight.
These June bugaboos,
Seldom here two by twos,
They arrive in a swarm day and night.
--- Joel D Ash

We resist with bug spray and what not;
We hit them with all that we've got;
Bug zappers and traps,
Organic stopgaps,
Or perhaps we are just forced to swat.
--- Joel D Ash

There are those who resist insect fights,
Seeing good in the bugs despite bites;
They see them as friends,
With a view that portends,
The announcement of bug bill of rights.
--- Joel D Ash

There are bugs that should not be exiled,
The ones that don't drive people wild;
Fireflies we enjoy,
Bugs we hate to destroy,
Ladybugs are the bugs poster child.
--- Joel D Ash

For most others I take great offense,
If they're dense I will spare no expense;
When June bugs eat the crops,
I do not call the cops,
Self defense is a way that makes sense.
--- Joel D Ash

Julie the June Bug was sad.
She cried for the life that she had.
I need to know why
I must die in July...
Can Autumn be really that bad?
--- Anon

Tonight's major battle I've won,
All without firing a gun.
Though they're not Visigoths,
(Only just damn moths)
I'm proud to say I did not run!