I throw ten bucks on the floor; A boss and his steno, quite fair, There once was a kiddie named Carr, My stump is as clean as my pate -- A certain young man was so deft, While fucking a fellow named Bruce Someone slipped Daisy a Mickey, There was a young woman named Vicki A fast-thinking bounder named Mailer It takes an unprincipled mug An indian tourist named Tonto, There was a young man of Pretoria He approached with great finesse, A newlywed jogger named Clyde Now patience, I hear them all say, Wake up, my dear Ulla. I must There was a young man from the War Office, A maid who was very becoming, Said Miss Atkins, "Young man, you're a bore! The moment I sighted her treasure, A short-cut I took through the alley Lithesome Sally is quite long and tall, Way back in the giant pine trees For guys who are not so well hung, Your beauty has started me thinking: A gent who is hung's a barbarian, It's standard equipment in dick; A quickie with you would delight With such little time you will find, I met a despondent Canuck, Disguised as a doe...or a buck? I once met a despondent Canuck I met an athlete at a track meet,
This is file yym
I shared with a track star my hash, Although she was young and I old, Today started off with a bang, A nasty surprise just this morning. I've ne'er traveled over the sea There was a blind fellow named Wayne There was a blind fellow named Scott A quickie is all I can spare; I'll turn out the light, lock the door; Each minute, I'll give you an inch This break-time quickie was a perk, 'Neath your desk I will lurk as you work, I guess I'm in for some OT; There once was a young girl from Anton So whether you like it or not, "I love well-warmed pussy," said Joe; A man's an outrageous flirt, There once was a lady named Mary A lusty Mongolian horde There once was a lecher of Leeds, I'm waiting here patiently to Kevin's a bloke we all love; Fuck me quick, fuck me deep, fuck me oft, Shyly said a young woman named Mabel, There once was a Spanish Nobilio The wife of a young man named Goozie That wench from Leigh-upon-Sea While noting the bulge in his trousers Yes, they're all convinced, you can bet True, I'm lacking the longest extension A southern-fried gal I was wooing "Don't bugger me, master I beg," But the master had already started,
When she bends down, she opens the door.
So I slide her a bone
Full of testosterone;
A cheap but effective score!
--- MrMalo
Were processing words as a pair.
When she told him to "ENTER"
He thought that she meant her,
And dutifully had her right there.
--- Dick Buenger P8407a
Who found a man laying his mar.
Said he, with a snicker,
As he watched the guy stick her,
"You do it much faster than par."
--- L0016
The freshest it's been to this date.
(It's usually sticky
Just after a quickie.)
Perhaps it was something she ate?
--- H Welchel
That he left his poor girl quite bereft.
He'd put it in slickly,
Then pull it out quickly,
And before she had felt it, he'd left.
--- Isaac Asimov
A girl made excuses profuse.
She was late for her class,
So she stepped on the gas
And she left him to stew in his juice.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0068
And left her a rosey-red hickey.
She couldn't recall,
What happened at all,
But she knew that her two lips were sticky.
--- Anon
Who said, "I don't want to be picky.
If, in five hours or so,
As you say, you must go,
At least we'll have time for a quicky."
--- Isaac Asimov
Enticed a girl into his trailer.
It took but a minute
To flop her down in it,
And ten seconds more to impale her.
--- Armand E Singer 401
To confine his foreplay to one hug.
Not being a bore,
A drop to the floor,
And a ten-second screw on the rug.
--- Isaac Asimov
Bought sex from a whore in Toronto,
But returned to the wild
Disappointed and riled -
In Toronto poor Tonto came pronto!
--- Playboy Mag J F O'Conner
Whose girl was a terrible worria.
Whenever he tried
To get it inside,
She complained he was trying to hurria.
--- Anon
The Persians delicatesse.
So spectacular
Was his scimitar,
She quickly took in his largesse.
--- Annie Jay
Got hard running back of his bride.
He pulled up so near her,
He started to spear her.
They say that she took it in stride.
--- David Miller
Is a virtue; so maybe I'll play
With your nipples for -- ooh,
Half-a-second or two,
Before boffing you senseless, okay?
--- Anon
Have your body and urgently thrust
Myself deeply inside
You and give you a ride,
That will quench my libidinous lust.
--- Anon
Who got into bed with a whore of his.
She took off her drawers,
With many a pause,
But the chap from the War Office tore off his.
--- L1065
Was humping the gardener's plumbing;
In the midst of their bang,
When their master, he rang,
They responded, "Yes Sir, we are coming!"
--- Cap'n Bean P9912
I don't mind your smashing my door,
And just forging ahead
Without a word said,
But why always here on the floor!"
--- John Ciardi
I knew that this gal had my measure.
We took to the task,
Forgetting to ask:
With whom am I having the pleasure?
--- SFA
And who should I meet there but Sally.
"Hello there!" I cried
As I slipped it inside
Her with neither a dilly nor dally.
--- Peter Wilkins
Yet she's known for her cooter quite small.
But our premature Pete,
With no stiff in his meat,
Buried tip, shaft, and half the right ball.
--- Anon
Was Sally and me on our knees
When up came a squirrel
Who startled the girl --
So much she orgasmed with ease.
--- SFA
That don't mind the smell of some dung,
Should try for the goal
Of another cute hole,
And score in a tight little bung.
--- Goin2later
Perhaps I should strive for a shrinking.
Reducing my measure
So Goin2 can pleasure
A little of me with her stinking.
--- Travis Brasell
And only likes shooting ovarian
Deep loads in your quim.
So forget about him
And instead, choose a strict vagitarian.
--- Hugh Clary
A prick is a prick is a prick.
But those that I greets
When hitting the sheets,
Best give me a mighty good lick.
--- Goin2later
And tantalize me, so tonight
I've only ten minutes
To get my thing in it,
So help me to guide it in right.
--- Anon
To spend with you on this quick grind,
I won't tease tonight.
I'll just get it right
To the heart of that hump from behind!
--- Anon
Who said she was down on her luck.
But lacking the heart
To up and depart,
I lingered and give her a fuck.
--- SFA
And you found her down on her luck?
I know not your demeanor,
But if she's got a weiner,
I think you should give her a suck.
--- SFA
Who quickly went down on my luck.
But then when she said,
She would need more than head,
I said that I don't give a fuck.
--- SFA
And asked if she'd like to meet my meat.
She said that she would,
Provided I could
Finish with her in a dead-heat.
--- Tutta Gioia
But for sex she demanded hard cash.
We settled on price,
I was done in a trice.
She said, "You must sprint in the dash!"
--- Tutta Gioia
I thought I had beaten her cold.
I came in first,
With a final quick burst,
But for speed, this event wins no gold.
--- Tutta Gioia
When on your front door bell I rang.
I said, "How I missed you,"
And hugged you and kissed you,
And then banged your thang with my wang.
--- Jon Gearhart
A knock on the door. Without warning,
I was knocked to the floor,
For a quick Gearhart gore --
My asshole is sore and it's yawning.
--- Archie
So you're right, you're mistaken, 'twern't me.
Your new jammin' bud
Must be some other stud,
Like Aussie Owl down from his tree.
--- Jon Gearhart
Who picked up a whore with no strain.
Un an alley he went
But the poor fellow spent
When her twat twitched the end of his cane.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1915
Who one day a ladyfriend sought.
As he made an advance,
He went off in his pants,
When his cane felt the twitch of her twat.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1899
I've paperwork piled up to there.
While I wait for a call,
We can sure have a ball,
So come on in, please have a chair.
--- Anon
No one will miss me, I'm sure.
Give me a quick poke,
With that mighty oak;
I've only ten minutes, no more.
--- Anon
More of my beef-log to quench
Your furnace's fire
And hose your desire;
When all ten are in, I'll you drench!
--- Anon
But hon, I must get back to work.
Back on goes the light,
But kiss me goodnight;
That tongue of yours drives me berserk.
--- Anon
And give you a right good tongue ferk.
And when you orgasm
And go into spasm,
Your work I will cause you to shirk.
--- Anon
Extra work never did bother me.
So I'll sit in my chair,
And play with your hair,
As you swirl your tongue in my pussy.
--- Anon
Who all of the guys would then rant on.
She spreads wide her legs
If a man then would beg,
And afterwards she puts her pants on.
--- Toolman
My girl has a hell of a twat.
So now, I'm not waiting,
I'm anticipating,
To give her all that I've got.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
It does no one harm, can't say no;
A little foreplay
Then let come what may --
It's tail and all systems are go!
--- Armand E Singer P0102
If he sees anything in a skirt.
His tongue starts to hang,
And he's out with a bang;
Stopping just short of pervert.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who wasn't at all so contrary.
She'd agree any day,
To a roll in the hay,
And she screwed guys tall, short, bald or hairy.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0411
Once gathered a feminine hoard,
And herded those skirts
Into dandified yurts
To make sure they could always get whore'd.
--- Norm Storer P9112
Who did up his privates in tweeds.
With a zipper installed
To keep them close-hauled,
Or released for his amorous needs (deeds).
--- G2397
Be pumped full of your special goo.
The lights at high beam
Reflect off your stream,
And give my complexion a hue.
--- Anon
He'll give any woman a shove.
He sings about fucking
And drinking and sucking;
There's naught he won't lie on top of.
--- Kevin Wilson
In the bog, in the bath, in the loft.
Up my ass, up my quim,
Knees, armpits, lip rim,
With your prick, but please, nothing soft.
--- Anon
"How delighted I am that I'm able,
To screw on a bed,
Or a sofa instead,
Or the grass, or the floor, or the table."
--- Isaac Asimov
Who lived in a Spanish castilio.
His cojones grew hot
Much more often than not,
At the thought of a Spanish jazzilio.
--- L1112
Had left him a little bit woozy.
In place of resisting
She attempted assisting,
And he thought he was back with his floozie.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0173
Said "Birth controls don't worry me,
For while lying in Arran,
I found I was barren."
"Come on," said the plumber, "Let's see."
--- Jim Weaver Collection
She fingered herself to arouse "hers".
This act made the fellow
So sex-crazed, he did bellow
Eu-rekas! and Zow-ies!! and Yow-zers!!!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
That their pussy's the best you can get.
Well, they're all on a par
So the best one by far,
Is the pussy you haven't had yet.
--- Anon
And failing the fattest dimension,
But if I am early
To pump her the pearly,
At least it's a bone of contention.
--- Anon
Once asked what I thought I was doing.
"Enough with the dating --
Let's get on to the mating!"
And ever since we've been screwing.
--- Neal Wilgus P8405
Said the serving wench, known as Our Peg.
Have full use of my muff
To deposit your stuff,
If you want to throw over your leg!
And Pegs legs were already parted.
But he stopped in mid thrust,
As he felt a great gust.
You've guessed it, Our Peg had just farted!