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They say, in the bush, that two Ffranks In flagrante delicto they were; A fellow named Neville-the-Nerd Kate once said, "Let's three-in-a-bed!" Those Miller boys, David and John, "It's often been said, 'Three's a crowd'", Though true that I'm under-endowed, I speak not for David, of course; And as for that fat biddy, Dawn, Our Dawn's an over-weight scrubber, Dawn is gone and we're on cloud nine; "I'm just popping in, do you mind, I hope he won't notice you, Fred. "Keep chewing him, Debbie, you must 'Chew slower.' I think we should leave them right there, A pentium five over-clocking; Well now, Sweet FA, don't you fret. We just had a row, Erm and me. Stand up for your rights like a man; Two women in bed? Goodness sake! Big Betty and her bigger sister What you need is a three-headed pecker, A threesome occurring in Norway, Was your bath all you thought it would be; To escape from a sexual boredom, A shame you're so quick on the trigger; I met a new girl on the freeway; If suffering from shortness of sight, Ah Girls, I am here for you both; So now that my teasing is through The Upstairs and Downstairs and moi, The Upstairs and Downstairs and me, Two daughters stayed on with old Glennis Oh Lord! How I love humping Annie; A virgin young man from Dundee In Vegas a hooker named Lou, Three gals and a coxswain named Jensen Four playing around's always fun, Said a specialty hooker named Jean, The first wife would cook, second clean; There was a young lady named Hope, A psycho who said he was French There was a young wife from Peoria, I'm old, so my margin decreases; There once was a lady from Seoul; The nobel prize for the immoral, An experienced lecher, Stefan, What a temperate man Dr. Wise is. As she lounges 'mid carnal debris, Said a frowsy French maid named Louise, Those triplets, Joanne, Sue, and Bess, If I had a girl named Delores, You men don't really need to fight; There once was a threesome so fine, There were three young girls in St. Thomas, A carefree young woman name Nola, (pergola - covered walkway)
The lovely Irene that I knew If you're speaking of actions immoral, I suggest that we tag-team her meat. There was a young girl from Balmoral Said Hassam, while showing his harem, An insatiable woman named Dee Two brothers in arms, Bart and Hewitt, A lusty young girl named Cassandra There once was a grand threesome party, A third hand would be rather handy
Are worth my regard and my thanks.
But two Ffranks in hand
Was what I had planned.
(And possibly spankings and yanks)
--- Anon
A pony, two hims, and a her.
Their arrangement: complex,
Made one wonder if sex
Was the only goal one might infer.
--- Norm Storer P0012
Was hanging with me and my bird.
She suddenly said,
"Let's three-in-a-bed!"
We did and I only came third.
--- SFA
I'm thinking I might get good head.
But Neville-the-Nerd's
Was bigger by two-thirds...
I ended up jerking instead.
--- David Miller
Both wake up at the crack of Dawn.
And most often they find,
That she doesn't mind,
If shortly past sun-up, they're gone.
--- Observer
Said young Dawn, "But I'm not too proud
To service two dudes,
And that even includes
These two, who are under-endowed."
--- Observer
I'm not living under a cloud.
With Bessie around,
Rest assured I have found
I still have enough to be cowed.
--- John Miller
You'll have to go straight to the source.
If it matters to you,
If indeed it is true,
That he's actually hung like a horse.
--- John Miller
I'm happy to say she's now gone.
She wasn't too nice
Leaving fleas, crabs, and lice
And shit-piles all over my lawn.
--- John Miller
Who said, "Boys, you must use a rubber!"
But we only had one,
Which we shared, and had fun
Screwing cracks and folds in her blubber.
--- David Miller
John's poor lawn, though brown, will be fine;
Dawn's shit had fed it,
But I must take credit,
For the fleas, crabs, and lice, which were mine.
--- David Miller
For a quickie." OK, but you'll find
That my husband's in bed
And I'm giving him head.
"Then I'll fuck you, my sweet, from behind."
--- Anon
"Well he won't if you're giving him head;
Keep on chewing his dick.
I'll be quick; I'll be slick... "
Well OK then, climb on to the bed.
--- Anon
Else he'll notice my very first .."
Oh my! Oommph! 'BLOODY SHITE
WIFE! There's no need to BITE
Me and damage my knob in your lust.'
--- Anon
'Shit. I'm cumming!' "Me too!" Ohmygod!
'Who the hell is that thrusting
Your ass with such lusting?'
Oh shit! 'Sounds like Fred, the old sod.'
--- Anon
For it sounds a most sordid affair.
I've forgotten who's who,
And it's time that I flew
Off to Birmingham, Durham or Ayr.
--- Anon
Sweet Wobbly now wobbling but rocking.
With Jeanie on hand
To steady my gland,
While Ericka does something shocking.
--- Frank
'Tis the season of joy, don't forget.
With your VISA, we three
Could have a shopping spree,
Else "not much" is what you're apt to get.
--- Jeanie
Went shopping, and what did we see?
A huge king-sized bed
And all that I said
Was "That's great. Big enough to take three."
--- Tiddy Ogg
Two women's just great, if you can.
Tell Erm, "It's a trait
Or genetic fate!"
If she buys it, I'll try it on Jan.
--- Hideout
That surely'd be too hard to take.
For my lovely wife,
The love of my life,
My head with cast iron would break.
--- Tychicus
Are as wild as a big Texas twister.
They pulled a 3-way
On my member today,
Till there was nothing left but a blister.
--- Mike Prsnut
Two sandwiches that are double deckers,
A little pipe dope,
Some soap on a rope,
And a cellar big enough for checkers
--- Buck
Was initially planned as a fourway.
But the last to arrive
Was a fat man named Clive,
Who could not fit through the doorway.
--- Cap'n Bean
Did you get what you fancied, all three?
If wine made it four,
You just wanted more,
How'd you bathe when you needed to pee?
--- Anon
The prospect of a very wild three-some --
Two fine chicks at my side
All six legs spreaded wide,
Makes this horny guy already come
--- Anon
You still could have pumped 'em with vigor.
And had them both coming,
If only your plumbing
Had been just a tiny bit bigger.
--- Anon
Her friend asked if I'd like a three-way.
But when I said yes,
She bared hair on her chest,
And her dong was enough to scare me 'way.
--- Gearhart
That scene is a regular plight.
The best way to cope
Is to have a quick grope,
To avoid being buggered that night.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Ignore what the others have quoth.
I'll satisfy you
My feminine crew --
Though never will I plight my troth.
--- Anon
I'll just drink a toast to the crew
Don't fret; I'll be good
I'm not drinking "Bull's Blood"
Or I might be expelled from the queue.
--- Anon
(Half English) an aiffair de trois.
Chaque temps quand nous start,
Can't tell them apart.
Peut-etre parce que it is noir.
--- Irving Superior P9408
(In half French) a menage of three.
When upstairs a bas,
Downstairs oo-la-la.
Translated to viva la vie.
--- Irving Superior P9408
This is file yhm
One blonde, one brunette. Sadly, when this
Fine troupe chose to flee,
I'd not had all three.
(Damned cops claimed that they were a menace...)
--- Anon
Our favorite way's fanny-to-fanny.
Since we're not that supple
It involves a couple
Of neighbors, named Debby and Danny.
--- Arthur Deex P8208
Indulged in a sexual spree.
He liked it with one;
With two it was fun.
Now he's anxious to try it with three.
--- Limericks Naughty & Gay
Ran a number with one gent, then two.
When a third ask to play,
She said, "Well, OK.
But that does it. Rien ne vas plus."
--- John Ciardi
Were marooned on the Isle of Ascension.
The ladies got tough
And swam off in a huff.
The man was the bone of contention.
--- Larry Wilde
With three or four lovers here, hon.
But I'm not that easy,
And never that sleazy,
I'll have my dicks just one on one.
--- Anon
Who made the Jacuzzi her scene,
"A rub-a-dub-dub,
Three men in a tub,
Not only come close, they come clean"
--- John Ciardi
The third wife would oil your machine.
She would tweak and she'd tune,
And would cause you to swoon.
I'm sure that you know what I mean.
--- Frank Fazed
Whose Ma washed her mouth out with soap,
When she found her asprawl
With three boys in the hall,
And doing her utmost to cope.
--- John Ciardi
Was found in the park on a bench,
In a sexual tryst,
In the cool, mormning mist,
With a corpse and a dog and a wench.
--- Cap'n Bean
Who checked into the Waldorf-Astoria,
Where she stayed for a week
With two Swedes and a Greek,
In a state of near-total euphoria.
--- John Ciardi
The trouble I have with police is:
They say it's a crime
Doing three at a time,
When I use all those fine extra creases.
--- John Miller
To have sex with three men was her goal.
With big boobs to proffer,
She'd plenty to offer,
Even though she'd the face of a troll.
--- Robert Elliot
The palm, the wreath and the laurel,
Goes to Josephine Bunce,
Who had three men at once:
One fore, one aft, and one oral.
--- Funny Bone
Keeps a woman upon a divan.
Two more on a chair,
All three of them bare,
And keeps proving to them he's a man.
--- Isaac Asimov
When three coeds in silly disguises
Leaped on him in bed,
He did not scold. He said,
"Very well, then. But no more surprises!"
--- John Ciardi
A Countess is bored with these three.
Now the bearded old lover
Leaps down from above her
To assault her again. Quel ennui.
--- Gents Alphabet Book P9506
"In France, we do it by threes;
I would not oo-la-la
At a menage-a-trois,
But a menage-a-quatre, if you please!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Transfixed me, I'll freely confess.
My fingers and prick
Into them I'd stick.
Together they came, nonetheless.
--- Randog
I would take her out into the forest;
Lying under tree,
We could fuck until three --
Till four, only if there were more o' us!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Three dicks will fit her just right.
In her ass and her cunt,
And her mouth (What a stunt!)
Pinch her nose and she's now water-tight.
--- Phred
That thought that young Sammy would shine.
They patted his head
And took him to bed,
And posted some pictures online.
--- Jon Downie
Arrived at a dance in pajamas.
They got screwed by the drummer,
And this went on all summer.
I'm surprised that by now they ain't mamas.
--- Anon
One time in a summer pergola,
Took care of three men,
Again and again,
And did it on just Coca-Cola.
--- Isaac Asimov
Said, "Dear Pete, I would sure like to screw;
But I hope you're aware
That my bedroom I share
With young Debbie and step-sister Sue.
--- Peter Wilkins
Then how about giving the laurel
To the doughty Queen Esther,
No three men could best her--
One fore, and one aft, and one oral.
--- L0311
It's an "all for one, one for all" treat.
As the third musketeer,
I'll take throat, puss or rear,
As we pierce with our blades, her damp heat.
--- Anon
Whose habits were highly immoral.
For the price of a dime
She took three at a time:
One fore, and one aft, and one oral.
--- G0516
"Friend Oojum, your root shouldn't scare 'em.
If you hanker for boojum
Take one or two, Oojum,
Or even try three...I can spare 'em!"
--- Grand Prix Lim 280
Said, "There're never enough men for me!
So instead of just one,
I'll finally have fun,
And triple my pleasure with three!"
--- Lims For Year - 01
Decided they'd finally do it
With their ladies of heart.
Bart made a good start,
And then it was Hewitt who blew it.
--- Carl Ludvig P0206
Wanted sex, as did her sister, Sandra.
Two under-achievers
Obliged these two beavers.
Would you call this a 'double ententre?'
--- Al Willis T9710
But for some reason, they didn't include me.
I could have been on the top
With a lick and a hop,
But I guess I'll wait for the orgy.
--- Steve Schrader
When me and my Wendy get randy.
While Wendy then blows,
One takes care of her rose,
And the others pet Candy and Mandy.
--- Dirruk
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