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Last night when I phoned you in bed, There once was a girl from Hat Creek. For a pickup, Pete's pecker was fine, Off hiking went Angie and Paul; They climaxed, stood back to recoup The couple just stood there and grinned, We see the young girl on her knees, A nearsighted voyeur named Adair, The bedsprings bang Bernie's bald head, Strange noises were heard from the galley, In the steeple Jan thought we'd be free Our showing was such a big hit, One week, during our love making, This young teenage girl named Devore, Ruth peeked through the keyhole last night A couple there was in Blefuscu, (subfusc - dusky, dark)
A young exhibitionist Kay, Wow-wee, look at pantiless Kay Kay, out of all the exhibit batch, At a bullfight, Jose made his bid. Her lover was so well endowed, A couple, sight-seeing Ksar, There was a young girl from Paris, The things that occur on the shingle, (shingle - small stone chips)
This thing you can do on command: The Queen thinks you give quite a show. Two men with a couple of gaudy ends, Gwen Crotch and her boyfriend get calls A zealot from Zeal Monachorum, Central park was the site of the pass. An artist who came from Vancouver There was a young man of La Jolla, There was a young lady named Coulsom A museum attendant, Zenobia, The team of Tom and Louise, (Getting rug-burns and a disease!)
That couple named Tom and Louise Oh yes! Take me back to the Ritz! They caught their own son, Billy Wade, I think I'll just take you right here, Now, I'm shocked by this attack, On Pine Street near Elm in Duluth A defoliated young dolly A talented horseman named Reid Bo's wife yelled, "You're lazy!" He showed her The gay young Duke of Buckingham, A certain young fellow named Vaughn At the Pigalle I met une jeune dame, Diamonds, a girls friend -- that's bull. Now Dirruk, let's stop and get real; While romancing the girl of my dreams, No method I sought to employ A medical teacher created At the butcher's, a lady dressed neat Two lovers went out to carouse, At the corner of Sutter and Taylor, (Sutter and Taylor - location probably San Francisco)
A couple named Big Dick and Valerie A covered young dolly named Sharon Strangest place that I ever got laid, A beach boy who loved to have fun, A young forest ranger from Vail A fervent fox-hunter at Quorn A lonely hearts club out in Dover The speed trophy goes to young Chad As we rolled around on the rug, Exceedingly horny is Gene; The ad said: "This classic treasure
My dearest sweet lady in red,
I wanted to hear
Your sweet voice, but I fear
I heard moaning and groaning instead.
--- Peter Wilkins
Whose virtue left something to seek.
Our young men all sought it,
And most of them bought it,
Though some only came by to peek.
--- John Ciardi
And the way he fucked Fay was divine.
Peeking through the wee keehole,
As he prodded her peehole,
Made me wish that his peter were mine!
--- G2124
They got to a stream - stripped off all.
And then, after stripping,
They went skinny-dipping,
While showered by a grand waterfall.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Their breath, then they heard a loud whoop,
And there on the bank,
All wanting a wank,
Were the leader and all the scout troop.
--- Anon
Quite conscious of how they had sinned.
The scout leader stated:
"A badge here is rated,
For that, but where could it be pinned?"
--- Anon
As she works ever harder to please.
An actor named Grant
Had just started to pant,
When the sheriff said, "Smile and say cheese!"
--- Ray Hemphill TP9804
While peeping was struck by despair,
Though he strains through his glasses,
For a view of their asses,
He couldn't see what went in where.
--- G1222
While above him Mae moans on the bed.
Her husband is using her,
Poor Bernie's abusing her--
In a whisper -- one squeak and he's dead!
--- G0089
And missing from deck was sweet Sally.
On investigation,
We found his inflation
Well-rooted in poor Sally's alley!
--- Cubemeister
Of observance, but afterwards, we
Got a standing ovation
From the whole congregation,
Who'd watched on closed circuit TV.
--- John Miller 0259
At the top of the Neilsens was it.
And each week thereafter
We took to the rafters,
To continue our sexual bit.
--- Arden
The rafters they started in shaking.
In no time at all,
We started to fall;
Crushed the priest during communion taking.
--- Lars
No longer thinks sex is a bore,
Since she saw through the blind
A great view from behind,
As the couple were fucking, next door!
--- Laurence Craft
And saw by the dawn's early light
The parlormaid, Kitty,
With her Joe at her clitty,
And she wet her pink pants at the sight.
--- G0152
Making love in a night of subfusc hue,
But some headlights drew near,
And made it quit clear,
They were right at the head of a bus queue.
--- Anon
Having tossing all her panties away,
Has invited us lads,
(Via newspaper ads),
To a pubic performance today.
--- Anon
Moving it in her special way;
Sure has me drooling
And that aint no fooling;
I don't know what more I can say.
--- Anon
Had the most tidy and coiffeured snatch.
Her show late today
Could show us the way
To hardon's and ectasy, natch.
--- Anon
When the maiden agreed, he was rid
Of all inhibitions
And, despite the conditions,
As the crowd yelled "Ole!" Jose did.
--- Isaac Asimov
She expressed approval aloud.
Said he, when she came,
And shouted his name
"Be still, you're attracting a crowd."
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0208
Were reckoned a trifle bizarre
When they gave way to passion
In far-reaching fashion,
Not far from the busy bazaar.
--- Harold C Bibby P9710
Who promised to do it for free,
But she held the event
In a large circus tent,
And charged each of the audience a fee.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
On the beaches surrounding old Dingle,
Can only be said,
In the bed of the wed,
For they'd tingle the single to mingle.
--- Anon
Does it ever get out of hand?
The Queen says, "Sweet Frank
We have you to thank,
For filling up our big grandstand."
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Frank, is this braggadocio?
Your calendar's full?
Or you're full of bull?
Inquiring minds want to know.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Used the things for some interesting bawdy ends.
And why not? It was fun
That did damage to none,
And completely delighted the audience.
--- Isaac Asimov
To screw for the public in halls.
Folks scream, "Let us sing, Gwen,
'The Song of the Inguin';
We'll follow the two bouncing balls."
--- G2283
Was sadly devoid of decorum:
He had a proclivity
For amorous activity
In public, in front of the forum.
--- Harold C Bibby
"Very well! Here and now!," said the lass.
Did the fellow then flee,
Pusillanimously?
No, he screwed her right there on the grass.
--- Isaac Asimov
Was raping a maid in the Louvre.
The old guard passing by
Paid no heed to her cry,
For he thought the affair would improve her.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0367
Who kept screwing his wife in the foyer.
Those who passed by would mumble,
Or stub toes and stumble,
But the foyer was where he'd enjoy 'er.
--- Isaac Asimov
Who went with her boy friend to bowl some.
She was fucked on the alley,
By an old man from Bali,
And she found it nutritious and wholesome.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0096
This is file yam
Suffered greatly from agoraphobia.
When at last she did yield,
'Twasn't out in some field,
But in front of a fine Della Robbia.
--- Armand E Singer 211
Do an act in the nude on their knees.
They crawl down the aisle,
While fucking dog-style,
And the orchestra plays Kilmer's "Trees."
--- L1469
Who performed doggie style on their knees,
Had to cancel their act
Because of the fact
They got rug-burns and mange, and some fleas.
--- Tepper and Morris P0104
Where we gave that young waiter fits!
When I fondled your cable
On top of the table,
And you licked the jam from my tits!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
A-pumping the family's maid
On the living room rug,
One huge grin on his mug,
His organ directly displayed.
--- Armand E Singer 884
Out on the front lawn now, my dear.
The neighbors won't mind;
They are so very kind.
They've already started to cheer.
--- Gearhart
With me naked and flat on my back,
In front of a crowd
That's cheering so loud,
And not one of them brought their Kodak.
--- Carol
An angry young beauty named Ruth
Slapped her boyfriend and said,
"I love sex in bed,
But not in a public phone booth!"
--- Grand Prix Lim 323
Said, "Unmarried sex is a folly,
But when you're in heat
A sex session's neat,
Even when, like this was, on a trolly..."
--- Grand Prix Lim 425
Once screwed, as he rode on his steed,
With a woman named Claire,
As she bounced in the air;
An equestrian marvel, indeed!
--- Cap'n Bean P0104
That she was all wrong when he throwed her
Damn naggin' old ass
Out into the grass,
And worked really hard as he mowed 'er.
--- Travis Brasell
Stood on the bridge of Rockingham
Watching the stunts,
Of the cunts in the punts,
And the tricks of the pricks that were fucking 'em.
--- L1383
Once felt irrestibly drawn
To exhibiting fun
That involved more than one,
So he screwed his best girl on the lawn.
--- Isaac Asimov P8206
Who said "Cheri, come, I've a plan.
We'll copulate on stage;
It will be all the rage;
A sensationally sexy Can-Can!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who wrote that is really a fool.
If you let their soft hands
Strip off a man's pants,
You'll hear them sigh, "Now that looks cool!"
--- Dirruk
With men it's a visual deal.
(Even diamonds and pearls,)
You'll find that with girls,
It isn't the look, it's the feel!
--- John Miller
My pecker burst right through the seams.
The POP drew her glance,
To that spot in my pants,
And I couldn't perform for the screams.
--- John Miller
Could calm her; she thought like a boy.
And caused quite a storm
Right there in the dorm,
Because she was screaming for joy!
--- John Miller
A stir when he once demonstrated;
The excited male member
Goes rigid from limber,
And doesn't back down until sated.
--- Alex Heydon P0406
Complained of his poor grade of meat.
His baloney, she felt,
Was so bad that it smelt,
So he threw her the meat in the street.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0275
Without waiting for marital vows.
There bill was so sweet,
They had sex in the street,
Which caused a slight raising of brows.
--- Anon
Lay a girl being fucked by a sailor.
From the crowd came loud cheers,
(Except for two queers)
As they watched his great instrument nail her.
--- G0779
Were hired at a fabulous salary
To make love on the stage;
Though the censors all rage,
It sure pleased us bums in the gallery.
--- Gramd Prix Lim 259 G0789
Said, "Why are the bystanders starin'?
I think you're real sweet,
Banging me on the street,
So what if they stare? I ain't carin'!"
--- Grand Prix Lim 199
Was a float in a public parade;
We badly behaved
As the people all waved,
And, to top it all off, we got paid.
--- Cap'n Bean P9807
Kept screwing a girl in the sun.
While his ass, being bare,
Cooked to medium rare,
The girl kept exclaiming "Well Done!"
--- Playboy Mag J F O'Conner
Found two naked girls on the trail;
He lent one his coat
Then turned billy goat
And misused the other for tail.
--- Armand E Singer 909
Felt he ought to make use of his horn;
So, crying out, "Zounds!
I'll not follow hounds."
He lay with his lass on the lawn.
--- Harold C Bibby
Attracted a lady named Stover.
Upon getting acquainted,
She felt ill anad then fainted.
She awoke and the rites were all over.
--- Albin Chaplin
Who, on meeting a girl, told her dad,
With a radiant smile,
"I won't harm your chile!"
The truth is, he already had!
--- John Miller
My wiener she started to tug.
It happened so fast,
The moment was past.
Then she kissed me and gave me a hug.
--- Burrito Man
His need for raw sex is pristine.
He'll pounce on his prey,
Forthwith have his way,
At speeds heretofore never seen.
--- Armand Singer
Of music will lengthen sex pleasure."
The ad was quite right,
As proven last night.
I shot my load by the third measure.
--- Travis Brasell
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