MORE
The man of a young girl named Glover A killer dwarf came from Stavanger; A dwarf wed a giantess, Randall, A hasty young lady named Gore There was a young whore in Nantasket That famous equilibrist Brown Although it is quite nice to vary, An experiened lecher from Mission Sweet Sally is best when supine, On my back, with my legs in the air, With physique resembling a loach, Well, not only the female physique A lady who favors coition, At last, a returning young bimbo There once was a fellow called Keith A young ape, very bright, but quite hairy, A preacher, just back from a mission, A rugged young lady named Good 'Missionary Position' will stop Said the Pussy Galore of Brunswick, We've been told since the old days of yore, When caught fucking boys near the mission, Here's an idea that's a gas; This ceiling is lumpy and weird. His butt is as bumpy as bark. Well girls if you want us to jump I did try to squirm all around Last time that we both hit the sack Sweet Sally is best when supine Our usual starting position Of sexual themes multifarious, A Japanese man, name of Hideo, There was a young woman named Cora Lee, A rounded young love of Belle Air, She first met a man for some action. A clever young cockster named Vinal Did you your desire ever sate, Bells and whistles and tooters, A seven foot tall lady angler A childless old fellow named Otis There was a young lady named May A skillful professional wench An amorous fellow named Bart Sexual positions are fun A curious cunter named Jay To his concubine Percy cried, "Toots! An amorous monster named Biddle Sex is so boring, I find; My fav is the woman on top; Turn her over and around as in Greek; Only nine orgasms in a week? The cunt of a cutie in Niles At a contest, a lady named Cog There was a young lady from Otley, In considering active coition, A Rice business major named Fred On top...Underneath...Half suspended... While fucking his girlfriend, Max Jopp, The Oggman replied to him, "No, A responsive young girl from back East, A Hostler who live outside Otley, In the Evening News Journal edition, A bashful young girl from Fort San Well, I once had a job at a store, A heart makes me think of your butt; There once was a gal named Lorraine, She thought that she would FORFEND
Attempted a new way to love her.
She was held by a 'copter,
But the poor pilot dropped her,
And it took him a month to recover.
--- Albin Chaplin
He'd take a whore home, then he'd hang her
In the hall, on a nail,
Then he'd stand on a pail,
From which height he'd happily bang her.
--- Tiddy Ogg
And the way they made love was a scandal.
For instead of a bed
With a pail on her head,
They screwed as he swung from the handle.
--- Bob Giandomenico P8712a
No longer could wait any more.
By her man tall and handsome,
She was had through a transom;
There was no time to unlock the door.
--- Albin Chaplin
Who would fuck (for a price) in a basket.
She could make it spin 'round,
And jounce up and down,
While her client below blew his gasket.
--- G0705
Achieved not just local renown:
He'd come to a climax
And set his new Timex,
While chained by his feet, upside down.
--- Armand Singer
Some of those positions are scary --
I prefer to ride
Nice and easy, astride,
Or the comfortable old missionary!
--- Anon
Was describing the arts of coition.
Said an aging old pop,
"I just lays on top."
Cried the lecher, "A brand new position!"
--- Hugh Oliver A053A
With a pillow placed under her spine,
To improve her gyration
In counter rotation,
And twists in the old bump-and-grind.
--- Anon
As you search among my pubic hair,
I sure do take pride
At the treasure inside;
Come and get it, dear Snooks, if you dare --
--- Anon
'Twas only her rear I could broach;
But often, my sweet,
For a change and a treat,
I would rather the frontal approach.
--- Anon
Can surprise; Though with clever technique
He would charm her real quique
His most honored Yang Peaque,
Was so small and incredibly weaque.
--- Anon
Has invented the spaceship position.
She lies down with ease,
And pulls up her knees,
And hollers, "Lift off!" and "Ignition!"
--- Anon
Who wasted some time with old Jimbo.
She's now on her back
And offering her crack,
With both of her legs out, akimbo.
--- Anon
Who was getting quite long in the teeth.
In the mission position,
He bowed to tradition,
But was much more relaxed underneath.
--- Dick Hedger
Was brought up in a strict seminary.
When he grew up and found
Time for messing around,
The position was pure missionary.
--- William N Nesbit P9701
Admitted with pious contrition
That he'd failed as a priest
To save souls--but at least,
He had taught them a brand-new position.
--- Norm Storer P9612A
Stood up to a man in the wood.
They could see where his knees
Skinned the bark off the trees,
For she stood a lot more than he could.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0700
When women find their niche on top.
When erections go
(Man's greatest blow)
You'll find you're a lollypop.
--- Irving Superior P8808
"When asked for my preference, I pick
The old family position
For big bouts of coition,
But some fellows just give it a lick..."
--- Grand Prix Lim 721
Woman's place is supine, evermore,
While the man moves above,
All the while they make love.
Did this come from some old hazy lore?
--- Bob Giandomenico P0308
The chief heard the threat of perdition.
Seems the previous priest
(A buggering beast)
Told him this was the missionary position.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
A cure for the bored, humping lass.
Before you make love,
Tack a mirror above,
Then count all the bumps on his ass.
--- Anon
I pondered, as at it I peered.
A zillion small bumps
To count while he humps --
Not very much fun, I'm afeared.
--- Anon
It'd be fun to count every mark
I'd better learn Braille,
A "mirror count" would fail:
He'll only have sex in the dark.
--- Anon
To attention while having a hump,
Try squirming around
With a whimpering sound,
'Stead of lying inert like a lump.
--- Anon
But that just caused trouble. I found.
It threw off his aim,
And I got the blame
When his juices went on the ground.
--- Anon
I painfully sprained my dear back;
For to pleasure my love
Tried to squirm like above.
Writhe with pain now - the damned bed went CRACK!
--- Anon
With a pillow placed under her spine,
To improve the gyration
Of counter rotation
And twists in the old bump-and-grind.
--- John Miller
Finds me wishing I were a magician,
Who could turn you to glass,
From your head to your ass.
Then at least I could watch television.
--- Pierce Evans
'Tis true that many are AERIOUS,
And some that exploit
Skills of the adroit,
But others are simply hilarious.
--- J'Carlin
Spent a night with a whore, for his libido.
He practiced coition
In every position,
Whilst recording it all on his video.
--- Anon
Who said, "I will do it immorally.
On top and on bottom,
Any way that I've got 'em,
Vaginally, anally, orally."
--- Isaac Asimov
This is file wzl
Laid guys on the floor, bed or chair,
In the breakfast nook, kitchen
Or parlor she'd pitch in...
If the guy had the cash, who should care?
--- Grand Prix Lim 517
His foreplay gave her satisfaction.
They enjoyed coition
In the strangest position;
His femur is now up in traction.
--- Stephen Cordwell
Invented positions: synclinal,
Head down, with legs high,
And God knows just why,
The ultimate: cerebrospinal!
--- Armand E Singer 383
Attempting position one eight?
Or was it just fine
In position nine --
And then did his passion deflate?
--- Anon
Airline strikes and stranded commuters,
Politics and science
And a lot of defiance,
But mostly just pussy and hooters
--- Anon
Fell in love with a bucking horse wrangler.
They attempted to court
But the bunk was too short;
In the morning they couldn't untangle her.
--- Cow Sheep Petersen Rhodes
Just served his dear wifemate due notice:
She must try new positions
To increase his emissions,
Like missionary or lotus.
--- Armand E Singer 875
When queried on ways she did play,
She replied, "Twenty four,
And there aren't any more."
She forgot the American way.
--- Albin Chaplin
Is one who'd on no account blench
At active coition
In any position,
Including the Greek and the French.
--- Isaac Asimov
Was pressing his girl to his heart.
She remarked in a daze,
"Will you love me always?"
He said, "Yes! Tell me how shall I start?"
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1944A
With who, where, and how they are done.
I know quite a few;
I'm sure you do to.
Please join me in trying each one.
--- Jon Gearhart
Screwed newly-found fillies each day,
In varied positions,
Revealing ambitions
To waste not that sun, which makes hay.
--- Armand E Singer 300
Let's make love by circuitous routes.
You jump on the bed
And stand on your head,
While I show you why all men are brutes!"
--- Guy Wernham P9306
Admitted he did love to diddle,
But added, "In reference
To sexual preference,
Most anything goes, near the middle."
--- Armand E Singer 913
I lay on my back and just grind.
A new variation
Could renew my elation,
So suggest one and come blow my mind.
--- Countrygirl
That way on her nips I will sop.
Bumping and grinding,
Her screaming no minding,
Feels so good I will not stop.
--- Toolman
My hand gives a slap to each cheek.
Her eyes roll back;
Orgasm on track;
That's the ninth one this week!
--- Toolman
I don't call it all very sleek.
Give me the power;
I'll have dozens an hour;
Lose count before I lose my peak.
--- Toocurious
Attracts all the cocksmen for miles.
She likes her coition
In any position,
Except in the rear (she has piles!)
--- G1024
Took part in a quiz dialogue.
Asked what fashions she knew,
She replied she knew two --
One was Paris, the other was dog.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-2086A
Whose boy friends were varied and motley,
Who had had her first
And who first, reversed,
Were questions debated quite hotly.
--- Prof M-G
Good girls scorn to impose a condition.
They let it be known
They have be to be shown,
To adopt any wanted position.
--- Isaac Asimov
Said to Jill as she stood on her head,
"I'd much rather lie
Looking up at the sky
Than upend with my face turning red."
--- Arthur Deex P0112
Karma Sutra and Western all blended...
I found she was best
When at her behest
I had her, while standing, up-ended.
--- Anon
The bus driver, oft calls out "Hop
Aboard, if your gay;
I go all the way,
And there's room for one more there on top."
--- Tiddy Ogg
Unless you get rid of that hoe,
With a 60 k sign.
We'll do 69
Then I'll enter real slow from below."
--- Lightbulb
In bed was an able artiste.
She had learned two positions
From the family physician,
And ten more from an old parish priest.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024 G1104A
Had a wife, who welcomed him hotly;
They both like a ride,
With him first astride,
And then is positions all motley.
--- Harold C Bibby
It said, "Wanted w/several conditions,
A female or male
Who's hearty and hale
And who knows exotic positions."
--- Michael Polo P8704
May pretend that she can't, but she can --
In a bed, on the turf,
Upside down, soixante-neuf,
With any available man.
--- Hugh Oliver 82d
Where they made me pack groceries (a bore!),
Except a girl in deli,
Whose nickname was Nelly,
Who'd happily go down on all four.
--- Anon
Of which you know I'm truly a nut.
Be my Valentine,
While I ride your behind,
So please be my Valentine slut?
--- M Foster
Who had a most serious pain.
Guys from Wendover
Asked her to bend over,
Bonking her without refrain.
--- Anon
The harassing advance of a "friend,"
So she turned her back
When he jumped in the sack.
He said, "Hey, that's cool, now bend."
--- J'Carlin
MORE