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Bill said to the Singapore whore, Gore's tactics are right from the book The good folks of PETA implore The President just endorsed Al: Now the question arises for sure: Cried Tipper, "Why Al those look awfully Al Gore's life is increasingly tense, Could it be he's just trying, my dear, Gore's plan, in deciding careers, Asked a survey of women, door-to-door -- Charismatic? He's hardly the Gipper; WOODEN was the way of Al Gore, Al Sharpton in 2004? Bill Bradley, Bill Bradley, Bill Bradley; There once was a general called Powell Though our forces salute General Powell, Mister Duke has no use for the Klan now, David Duke is the sort that could spawn David Duke says that now he's maturer The former VP, Fritz Mondale, Foul rumors: Gary Bauer's a fur-man? Gary Hart, a bright future did paint, All the flak that he gets seems a shame, The affair Gary had was bizarre; (Politician Gary Hart played games with Ms Rice)
While fooling around with a tart, Politicians, like some high strutting tart, (the rebus 'I heart-symbol heart-symbol')
A man in the news -- Gary Hart -- Gary Hartpence gave his voters the sense The dwindling dwarfs cause no fuss; "The way Gary Hart cavorts, Gary Hartpence, as always quite chipper, Jerry Brown points out Government misuse To the mystical boosters of Brown, A White House contender, Kucinich, I'll put brakes on inflation; what's more, Paul Tsongas's argument he's "Self reliance," Phil Gramm's people say, When it looked like Ralph Nader would foil it, Their liberal agenda they push, A father, who felt rather trusty, You'll probably think I'm no smarty, And you can just think what it means, Ross screwed up in 1992; So no one will misapprehend Tom Harkin's deceit's to pretend "It's not hopeless, but still I confess," Mondale, as you know, is a schiz Guinevere is the nickname he's got, The Republican lead got much greater, H. Ross is a man that I like, It's time for Reform: Ross and Chote! If you must vote for better, then go Perhaps some of you are at a loss I've had my fill of old farts, Said H. Ross Perot, "You can thank Ross Perot walked through Dodge to a cheer. We've not heard from Ross for awhile, Perot was a Texas squeakpip; You've all heard of Roswell, I know; I never heard him say, "Whoa!" George Bush and Quayle? NO NO NO! There was an old man named Perot, I think I can give Ross Perot There once was a man named Ross, A billionaire from Texas named Ross, The desperate will vote for Perot,
"Just where did you intern before?"
"It was in China
Where we use vaginas;
Now I clerk for the monk's friend, Al Gore."
--- Marsha Magee
Machiavelli, if you'd only look.
He wants to be "The
Prince" over us. Duh!
Like Niccolo', by hook or by crook.
--- William A Taylor
That firms test cosmetics no more
On hapless young mice.
(Indeed, not very nice),
But continue to test on Al Gore.
--- Anon
"He could lead the country right now!"
But Al we know well
Is boring as hell;
Gore may as well throw in the towel.
--- Anon
Just what job can Gore find that's secure?
He's got time on his hands,
While he lays out his plans,
For a comeback in two-thousand-four.
--- Anon
Like Cocoa Puffs made of dark toffee.
Now just think of it!
Were it money you shit,
You'd be a hit at a fundraising coffee!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection
As his lawyers plot out his defense.
Asian monks, temple gongs,
Campaign funding gone wrong.
Mr. Gore should have used better sense.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
To say what we all want to hear?
And once in control,
He'll take his wee pole,
And screw one and all in the rear?
--- Anon
(Once he brushes aside any tears,
And is not too despondent):
A white house correspondent!
He'll interrogate Bush next four years!
--- Anon
For sex with Al Gore, would he score?
Ten percent said "No way!
I prefer my sex gay!"
Ninety said, "Who the hell is Al Gore!"
--- H Myers TP9804a
Mr. Rodgers is probably hipper.
But Al Gore's running strong
With the food-service throng,
'Cause his wife is a really big Tipper.
--- Larry Hollister
Whose speeches produced a mass snore.
He'd no help from Bill,
Who thought him a pill,
And wondered what V.P.'s were for.
--- Chris Papa
When I saw that, my jaw hit the floor.
There's no fucking way
That on election day,
I will vote for that coiffed camera-whore.
--- Tomer Shiran
You seem to be polling so badly,
This primary season.
Pray what is the reason?
We'd vote you for president gladly.
--- Prof M-G
Who shouldn't have thrown in the towel.
For he'd come tops in pollin',
If they didn't make Colin
Sound just like the end of your bowel.
--- Mesterton-Gibbons a
There's no candidate he'll disembowel.
For he'd only run
If he'd already won
And the others had thrown in the towel.
--- Larry Dahl
He's matured and is quite spic-and-span now.
David's altered his views
About kill all the Jews.
And has friends Afro-American now.
--- John Sandler P9204
A rebirth for our land--a new dawn.
He'd dispell our ennuI
With a cross burning spree,
Which he'd air from the White House's lawn.
--- John Sandler P9204
Than before, and a great deal securer.
In his view, things would be
So much better if he
Were elected America's Fuhrer.
--- John Sandler P9204
Has a problem that seem's to entail
When he speaks on TV
Inarticulately,
The voters doze off without fail.
--- Arthur Deex P8411
Some ladies he had his fat worm in?
The stories some weave
Are hard to believe;
He looks too much like Pee Wee Herman!
--- Anon
But there was one major complaint.
He met with Miss Rice,
And he paid the full price,
'Cause he just wouldn't practice restraint.
--- Gifford Wherry
But there's only himself he can blame.
He's been caught in the act
Of concealing the fact
That Hotpence is his actual name.
--- A N Wilkins P8803
Eating Rice in motels goes too far.
He'd have not paid the price
If he took good advice
To let Ted take her home in his car
--- Al Chaplin P2005
Poor Gary was not very smart.
Now, politically,
He's depressed as can be,
For he is a real broken Hart!
--- John Dohner P8805
Are flaunting their wares a la carte.
Each new bumper sticker
Makes me sicker and sicker...
Oh spare me from "I love Hart".
--- Arthur Deex P8405
Did things that were not very smart.
They all thought he was out
But he said, "I'm no lout!
I stayed right at home with a tart!"
--- John Dohner P8805
That his chance for success was immense.
But what popped his bubble
And caused all his trouble,
Is that he kept dropping his pence.
--- A N Wilkins P8707
The polls show who's minus, who's plus;
But we're taken aback
By this new Hart attack --
Gary sure has a Hart on for us.
--- Arthur Deex P8803
There's the rumor," explained Mrs. Schwartz,
"That is he can horn in
When the guy's finally sworn in
As chief he'll wear only his shorts.
--- A N Wilkins P8802
Still hopes to succeed the old Gipper,
And the motto he'll sport
To gain proper support
Is, "This time, win one for the zipper."
--- A N Wilkins P8801A
And advocates Armed Forces disuse.
To discuss more he's loath,
Since he once took an oath
Of silence (on all major issues).
--- Arthur Deex P9205
Jerry's influence, wealth and renown
Is the proof that they need
Each of them can succeed,
For an "out" doesn't have to be "down."
--- John Sandler P9204
This is file wcl
Whose main source of protein is spinach,
Though so very healthy,
Ain't delegate-wealthy;
He won't have a stake at the finich!
--- Anon
Drive deficits down to the floor;
I'm of the new breed,
And I'm guaranteed,
For five years, and not just for four.
--- Ed Potts P8501
The one for the job of Big Cheese
Seems to rest on the claim
He's the creme de la creme,
Since he beat a life-threatening disease.
--- John Sandler P9204
"Is the proper American Way.
And to be on the Dole
Is not on the roll
Of approved family values today."
--- A N Wilkins P9508
Helpless Gore made a run for the toilet.
In his manner concise
Ralph gave Al sound advice:
"Just abandon this race or you'll spoil it."
--- Al Chaplin P0012
But their brains must have turned into mush.
No, it isn't a joke.
Those misguided folk
Voted Nader and gave us George Bush.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun
Sent off his young daughter, quite busty,
To work as intern.
He had little concern
'Cause Nader at sex was too rusty.
--- Frank Fazed
But both of those dogs need a hearty
Ass kicking or two.
So here's what I'll do:
I'll vote for Ralph Nader's Green Party.
--- Frank Fazed
Those interns in twenties and teens,
Who wouldn't think twice
And would heed Ma's advice:
All kids should just eat up their Greens.
--- Tiddy Ogg
It seems that his brain cells are few.
Reform's saving hand
Would have been Richard Lamm;
Perot simply hasn't a clue.
--- Nelson Seggley
That Tom Harkin's the working man's friend,
He invokes dad, a miner,
Who was never a whiner
And his immigrant mom without end.
--- John Sandler P9204
He's the downtrodden working man's friend,
Since his dad was a miner.
This program's definer
Is the timeworn, old bunk, "Tax and spend."
--- John Sandler P9204
Walter Mondale complained in distress,
"Though I could beat Reagan,
That born-again pagan,
I can't run against all the press."
--- A N Wilkins P8411
Ophrenic who lives by his wits.
Walter's sugar and spice
And everything nice...
And the bad things were all done by Fritz.
--- Arthur Deex P8408
And they say Walter Mondale is hot
About having that name.
Folks say it's a shame
But it's clear that he loves Lance a lot.
--- A N Wilkins P8411
And the Democrats started to crater,
When the President's tonic(a)
Went from sax to Whoremonica,
And Gore's hopes went from zenith to Nader.
--- Anon
With a presence not seen since old Ike.
With madness quite clear
And that grin ear-to-ear,
And like Ike, brain-dead as a spike.
--- Jim Weaver Collection a
Not Bob in his tie and his coat,
Nor Bill's open fly,
Both have had their last try.
Now be sure to get out and vote!
--- Stephen Fierbaugh
And squander your vote on Perot.
Then you can say smugly
(When things turn quite ugly)
"Remember that I told you so!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Why I want to be President Ross.
It's simple, you see:
It's better for me
If I am the one who is boss.
--- F R Duplantier
Like Reagan and Bush for starts.
I'd rather have Gore
And Bill and his whore,
Than Ross and his fucking charts.
--- MrMalo a
Me for covering right or left flank.
I abandoned the corps
At the first sign of war,
And cried all the way to the bank."
--- Martin Wellborn P9206
He was nude and blamed Kitty 'cause "We're
Strolling out on the prairie
And she stripped me. It's scary,
And then she said, 'Go to town,' so I'm here."
--- Don Moore P9402a
With his cat/canary big smile.
I'd rather Bill's peter
Than Ross for our leader;
We don't need a dictator's style.
--- Frank Fazed
A little too quick with a quip.
He first said "I'm out!"
Then turned face about,
But the voters still gave him the slip.
--- Anon
Where all little Aliens go.
They're there in small hangars,
Massaging small whangers;
They all look just like Ross Perot!
--- Marsha Magee
So, therefore, I can't really know.
But, shave Gabby Hayes,
And in many ways,
He'd probably pass for Perot!
--- Larry J Davis P9402
Bill Clinton and Gore? HO HO HO!
From all that I hear,
No-one's voting this year,
By the way--who is H. Ross Perot?
--- John Roberts P9301
An awesome political foe.
He talked with reporters,
Got lots of supporters,
And then said, "Hey, I gotta go."
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Image help with his upcoming show.
Though he's got lots of money,
He still looks too funny.
Those ears really do have to go.
--- Larry Dahl
Who put SPAM on dental floss.
Now he's a rich millionaire
With big ears and a flair
And he wants to be the nation's boss.
--- Andrew Wiseman
His hat in the ring, he did toss.
While some were excited,
Lots more were afrighted
At the prospect of Ross for a boss.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Adding graphs and charts for the show.
We know he can hear
As he looks "all ear",
But each time I see him, they grow!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
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