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Forgetting great men would be callous, Jesus Christ, Superbiz, don't you know Clinton is loved in the poll; I voted for Bill and how! The leader of my Fatherland I've heard Clinton cheated and lied, Some are in favor of Bill, The Queen just received a new fax By chicanery, swindle, and scheme, Maybe the poll situation His reign was just odd theater great, Western earth-movers and shakers So now Utah folks feel "Though Bill Clinton's out wooing all classes, If Utah's job base should dive, So Clinton has declared "Off Hands" Even after these years of such pain, When Clinton came on, they said WOW! King Clinton has done it again Some times it all seems so clear; You get government that you deserve, On Inaugural Day we can see Impeach him, Republicans are beggin'; Though detente has provided relief, If Bill wants Barbra Streisand to sing, Four more years we are getting from Bill. (Beatles song)
Aides told him, it's time for a rally. "I think the Republicans stink!" For the Kansan don't shed any ears, If leaving the church they were booed? Through Congress, his budget plan sailed The budget fills Bill with distress; "I am warning you, do what I say, There once was a President named Clinton, He's a sore in the mouth like a canker; With Bill's lying, my blood pressure peaks; There once was a Pres named Bill He had a big bitch of a wife, Now the Pres, who was seen as a glutton Now his grumpy old foe was Bob Dole, Now the Pres, who plays a mean sax, Bill wanted to show he's efficient Bob warned us, alone on the floor, It's not worth my spare time to note Not Billy, 'cause that is the law, To Hillary Clinton said Bill, Bill Clinton ran well for president, Let's all sing "Hail to the Chief." Though bein' tempted for many a time Bill was always a polished debater, In Montana Bill must draw a line; There once was a Clinton named Bill, An orthopod fixed up the knee, Thank you so much for your time Time has come for a lesson to teach The man who resides where the buck stops, From here I just judge by his works, And those who mistakenly think For this is the way of the world; And all of it is just perception The leader's the dominant male We keep hoping for their abdication; So here's one I've posted before Hey, get a load of this, folks! (Source: Center for Media and Public Affairs)
When the Congress and Bill meet to chat The White House is great and it's evident
So we honor their fame without malice.
But a pillar would seem,
To unerringly mean,
We'd memorialized Bill with a phallus.
--- Anon
That the folks in this group love Bill so?
If you tell Clinton jokes,
Then these very same folks
Will turn up the flames 'till you glow.
--- Anon
Who cares if he's found a hot hole.
The economy's great.
Just lay off jail bait,
Or repubs will put us back on the dole.
--- H Bomb
I'd vote the same again now!
The issue, no doubt,
That I care about
Is Jones...not Paula, but Dow!
--- Richard H
Has taken a powerful stand;
As the danger still grows
I'm sure that he knows
That he holds the match in his hand ...
--- Anon
Now it seems like his butt will be fried.
No wars have been fought,
Our children get taught,
So hell, I'll stay on his side.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
And some wish his guts would spill.
But I'm truly disgusted
With how he's been busted.
And wish congress and news hounds to hell
--- Jim Weaver Collection
From Madame Tussauds. Here the facts:
"Done Bill's balls and his dick;
They're life-size and real slick;
But now Ma'am, we've run out of wax!"
--- Anon
Bill's achieved the American dream.
Though his greatest success
Is on Monica's dress,
Aren't you proud to be part of his team?
--- Anon
Could use some investigation.
CNN sources say
Something different each day.
Their numbers need reconfirmation.
--- Gearhart
And whether you liked him or hate,
He did provide fun
To limericks we spun,
'Bout bawdy red-neck Chief of State.
--- Chris Papa
Drooled over millions of acres.
But at the last minute
The land went off-limits;
Now they're whining, like spoiled bellyakers.
--- Dr Limerick
Clinton grabbed their rich land in a steal.
Then signed rights away
In Arizona that day,
Not in Utah, where they'll feel the raw deal.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
He'll never be one of the masses,"
Jerry Brown claims. "It's true,
Because he'll always view
The whole world through Rhodes Scholared glasses."
--- A N Wilkins P9205
It's OK 'cause her votes equal five.
And since those five are lost,
Just let them pay the cost,
As they angrily buzz in their hive.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
A huge tract of scenic South lands.
If only he'd been there
Years ago to declare:
"The National Park of Sundance."
--- Jim Weaver Collection
And the pressure that's cooking his brain,
When it's all said and done,
And the last race is run,
Slick Willy will rise once again!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
We'll get that crook yet...And how!
But after this long,
With all he's done wrong,
You'd think they'd have something by now!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
As he rules with a stroke of his pen.
To hang onto his throne,
Utah miners can groan.
Who care about plain citizens?
--- Jim Weaver Collection
I cannot do better, I fear.
But of Bill they're still fond
This side of the pond,
And I really find that kind of queer.
--- John Miller
So Clinton was twice asked to serve.
As our President
With cock straight or bent,
He'd doing it with lots of nerve.
--- Arden
Some events that won't be on TV.
There's Rodham's subpoena,
Bill's drugs come from Mena,
And Al Gore is humping a tree.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Slick Willie is not even shaken.
Paula Jones case is dead;
Not much more to be said.
At least he's not senile like Reagan.
--- Navin
There's a threat that could cause the world grief.
We must act right away;
There's no time for delay.
Buzz the Marriott, we need the chief.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
He must give her permission to bring
Her current white Knight
To spend the whole night
In the White House, like a Queen and a King.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
After eight years we should have our fill.
But with lawsuits to handle
And Whitewater's scandal,
Perhaps there's a 'Fool on the Hill.'
--- Limerick Man
"Make your choice, sir, there' no time to dally."
With big boobs on his mind,
He says he's inclined
For a visit to "Silicone" Valley.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Said Bill Clinton. "And what's more, I think
That Perot is a jerk;
That his plan just won't work,
And that Dole is a chicken-heart fink!"
--- Oliver M
In the Senate he had some good years.
But Clinton can smile,
'Cause he'll win by a mile,
And soon can announce "FOUR MORE YEARS!"
--- Quilis
I'd say that it was very rude.
But knowing the facts
They would give him the axe...
Typical Christian attitude!
--- MrMalo a
With all those good points it entailed.
But when it was read,
So many then said,
Bill Clinton had surely inhaled.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
With his party, he's now in a mess.
As the GOP chugs
Willy's shoulders he shrugs,
Then runs after the budget express.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Or I promise there's hell that you'll pay.
Cale and staff I want gone;
They have been here too long.
And p.s. Tell them have a nice day."
--- Jim Weaver Collection
This is file vam
Who'd rather go joggin' than sprintin'.
But a leisurely pace
Might still win this race,
If it's Dole that Perot votes are stintin'.
--- Walter Rollin
And his party is speaking with rancor.
It's each man for himself;
They'll put Bill on the shelf;
His coat tails are now a great anchor.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
He won't answer or take our critiques.
So for your protection
From his interjection,
You should condom your ears when he speaks.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who had his fat hand in the till;
With money he'd pay
For a three-dollar lay,
From the seclusion of Capitol Hill.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who'd stab her friend's back with a knife.
Now the Pres, he did fear
That Mrs. Bobbit slept near.
So he'd not slept a wink in his life.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
For steak and potatoes and mutton,
Made his appetite clear,
That job loss was no fear;
Who would, with their hand on the button?
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who constantly dug his own hole,
With rantings and ravings
And GOP cravings,
Met reality head-on at the poll.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
To some, he may seem a bit lax.
At his inaugural address,
He'd eye all in a dress
And even a few who wore slacks.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
In things foreign, so very proficient.
But in troubles he's mired,
And the missles were fired
Because his own weapon's deficient.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
'Cause an oath to his country he swore.
With their far-leftist goals,
We would lose all our souls,
And be forced to turn over the store.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
If Bill is a lamb or a goat.
Despite all your fears,
He's there two more years.
On Clinton we'll not again vote.
--- Frank Fazed
But another from Hope Arkansas
Might have held the White House
Except that her spouse
As First Husband's a little too raw.
--- John Miller
"I think we can stay on the Hill.
'Cause tired old Dole
Dug himself a hole,
And the Whitewater thing, a cheap thrill."
--- Andrew Wright
And became the White House resident.
But his troubles piled
'Cause his friends ran wild,
But he also had much precedent.
--- Joseph McEwen P9407
He's just trying to get some relief.
If Hillary doesn't mind,
We should all get behind
Him and quit giving him all this grief.
--- Rusty Smith
To get rid of old Billy-boy's slime
In a violent way,
I am sorry to say;
I've denied me this pleasure sublime.
--- Anon
Now he plans to be gun confiscator.
All you gun nuts aren't wrong
And you won't have them long
Unless you're a felon or traitor.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Stop the hate talk, let's all be benign.
While he's up on the horse,
Thought of danger, of course,
But don't worry, he has not a spine.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who lived up on Capitol Hill.
He sold out the White House
And cheated on his spouse,
Then tore up his knee in a spill.
--- KJ
While the Senate checked out DNC.
Show me the money,
The numbers look funny,
Said Al Gore and friend Hillary.
--- KJ
As I close this rendition of rhyme.
I know it's quite sill,
But alas, old slick Willie
Makes making fun, much more sublime.
--- KJ
That they really are not out of reach.
For one hour each day
Join our protest display;
And at noon, headlights on to impeach!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Was arrested, and told by the fed cops,
"These little white slips
Are for two many flips,
Alternating with too many flops."
--- Cyber Geezer
And not by his lurks and his perks.
The world has felt safer;
He's no gung-ho strafer;
It's only the "GOP'S" that he irks.
--- Anon
That Presidents never should drink
Give way to their lusts
Or fiddle with trusts
Or sometimes to visit a shrink
--- Anon
Through my years I have seen it unfurled;
For leaders are takers
And cover-up fakers.
Their standards are twisted and curled.
--- Anon
And not really any deception.
We believe what we're told
In headlines quite bold;
It depends on the press's reception!
--- Anon
Beside him our prowess must fail
All ladies desire
To share in his fire
He naturally gets lots of tail.
--- Anon
When they leave there will be jubilation.
It's in evil they toiled,
So the White House was soiled.
The first thing will be fumigation.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Poking fun at BC and Al Gore.
If you do not like it
Then feel free to strike it,
And write me off now as a bore.
--- Anon
Bill Clinton's the butt of more jokes
In all history
On late-night TV,
Than all other top-ranking blokes!
--- John Miller
About budgets, they end in a spat.
But a new game's beginning
And in the first inning
They'll make Bill take the first turn at bat.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
That a lot can be learned from its resident.
If you practice your drawl,
And no morals at all,
Someday you too can be President.
--- John Miller
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