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With skill in the word parsing game,
Bill Clinton will have lasting fame.
And though he may brag
Of the "Slick Willy" tag,
It's PERJORATIVE, all the same.
--- Chris Papa

Well, Clinton survived the attack --
He's once again slipped through the crack!
So away he trots,
'Cause the rest of the pots
Were afraid to call that kettle black!
--- Anon

Clinton's days are going by in a whoosh.
Before he leaves, he wants a big push.
Worried about his legacy --
His place in our history.
It's easy, he's the President after Bush.
--- David A Brooks Q

I'm thinking of starting a push for
Putting Billy's dick up on Mount Rushmore.
First in whore, first in piece,
First to fuck someones niece,
And first in desire to gush more.
--- Anon

For in this manner, they may
Ask questions all night and all day.
These statesmen so glum
Take it up the bum,
And it this you have no say.
--- Anon

There once was a man named Slick Willy,
Who told the whole nation a dilly:
"I'm your President, folks."
But enough with the jokes,
Will you tell us who's president, really?
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Presidential MONONYM, a dilly,
Which few folks now think of as silly,
Describing the part,
As well as his art;
That "Red Neck" we now know as "Willy".
--- Chris Papa

Get off your fucking fat ass!
Sorry if that sounded crass.
At the last election,
His perpetual erection
Should have been rejected en masse.
--- Arden

Bill Clinton has spoken with pride
Of some bills he has happily signed.
But he seems to ignore
Many got to the floor
Because of a Republican landslide.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

If the Vast Right Wing were to conspire,
They sure wouldn't choose such a liar.
To conspire and be vast;
Right winged or right assed;
Why a jerk with his pants on fire?
--- Anon

Look how they have stuck it to me;
Why can't they just let me be.
I'm sure I have read
It was Jesus who said,
"Don't flaunt your religiosity."
--- Dave

In the garden of earthly delight
Somebody has started a big fight.
There's blood on the wall
And that is not all,
There's something very dead on the right!
--- Anon

A man once from Arkansas
Was seen all too often quite raw.
His national exposure
Should finally reach closure,
Unless Bill rises above the law!
--- Andy Onymous

We're often described as ironic,
Acerbic, sarcastic, sardonic.
Why are we so arch?
It's drycleaners starch,
Makes our casual cantankerousness chronic.
--- Tom Simon

I myself am thoroughly bummed;
Consider my nose to be thumbed
At the whole crew,
But scared what they'll do,
Before the whole problem is plumbed.
--- Karen

Now Slick is a real miracle man.
The polls show if anyone can,
He can stick it in double,
And come out of trouble,
It's a Right Wing conspiracy plan.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Bill Clinton has said quite a lot,
And his listeners deserved what they got;
But at times he has lied,
And the things he's denied,
Convinced me he's still smoking pot.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

His wife says he's filled with shame
While besmirching his good family name.
We all know that Bill
Just loves a cheap thrill,
But his poor Granny's the one to blame.
--- Frank Petersohn

Our hero's been taken away;
Unresolvable conflict, they say;
With less chance than Lotto
Of upholding his motto:
"Truth, Justice ... The American Way!"
--- Anon

Hoping to score him a goal,
Bill Clinton attended the Bowl.
But soccer moms booed him.
Had nobody clued him?
He ought to have taken a poll!
--- Anon

Halloween brings out priates and fairies,
Plus a rash of strange monsters all hairy.
But for tricks and no treats,
Bill and Al have them beat;
They're the one that I think are most scary.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

A raving right-winger named Tibbs,
Sought to give Bill a poke in the ribs.
But with meter so poor,
He was naught but a boor,
And so Clinton sloughed off all the digs.
--- Joe Long

There is a great man named Bill
Who climbed to the top of the hill,
But he'd gotten ants,
And dropped his pants,
And the voices are getting shrill.
--- Joseph McEwen P9407

Somalia and Waco weren't pranks;
In shame, very high each one ranks.
How are these events tied?
In both, innocents died,
But in Waco our leaders used tanks.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Come one, come all, follow me
Across the bridge to the next century.
Bring your cash or your card
'Cause you're getting hit hard
With a toll and a tax and a fee.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

In spite of my conservative leanings,
The re-election of Clinton's intriguing.
Imagine the fun
When I turn on C-SPAN
And watch the impeachment proceedings.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

In the future our grandkids will stare
At a portrait of Clinton somewhere.
He'll be holding a scroll
While he's taking a poll,
His wet finger held high in the air.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

If Congress decides to employ it,
And rather than censure, a coy hit,
Has Willy stripped bare,
And whip derriere,
Except that I'm sure he'd enjoy it.
--- Chris Papa

At the end, Ray and Starr had to simper;
Of evidence they had no glimmer.
They spent millions of bucks
Raking the muck,
But are finished sans bang, but with whimper.
--- Dr Limerick 03-20-02

The Clintons are now sinking fast;
His party is scared and aghast.
With tempers exploded,
The lifeboats are loaded;
The women and children are last.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Saying she can't recall, she just shrugs;
Susan's covering up for the thugs.
New commercial is set;
It's a winner, you bet --
Children this is your brain while on drugs.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

There are things they don't want you to know,
But you reap from that which you sow.
They've come to discover
A film undercover;
Roger Clinton buys coke for his bro.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

A new twist to the Clinton mess
Revolves around Monica's dress.
Now they say that cocaine
May be found in that stain.
If there is, will Willie confess?
--- Gearhart

This is file uum

Will he say it belongs to M L (Monica Lewinsky)
And deny his drug use until
A drug test confirms
That not just his sperm's
On the dress, but his coke as well?
--- Gearhart

Doc Sam Houston has nothing to gain,
As Bill's medical questions remain.
Take a Little Rock trip;
Learn the truth and you'll flip,
'Cause he knows about Bill and cocaine.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

I'm Clinton, I didn't inhale;
I spin a most marvelous tale.
I once tipped my hand
Against my homeland,
But mostly I've covered my trail.
--- John Miller

By the White House, we're left in a quandary.
We've discovered their dirty drug laundry.
It's a crack staff indeed,
And we'll gladly concede
An obvious double entendre.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Thanks to Bill there is more crack and meth
That has ended so many kids' breath.
You need not be a sleuth,
To know where to find truth.
Talk radio scares him to death.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Their election was quite an event;
In the war on drugs, he put a dent.
With young people we find
Willy's really their kind.
Use of drugs is up eighty percent.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

These kids will not make it to Yale,
And they love their smokes and their ale.
It seems he's not joking;
Bill teaches safe smoking,
And shows them how not to inhale.

(Bill Clinton did not inhale the one time he used pot - McW)
--- Jim Weaver Collection

In the galley aboard Air Force One
Stands the President, having some fun,
With a stewardess, Gail,
Who knows how to inhale --
Till the oxygen masks come undone.
--- Anon

Bill is following through, we confess;
It's been very successful, we guess.
He had planned it so well,
Increased drug use will tell.
His compaign to the kids, just say yes!
--- Jim Weaver Collection

His honor again they assail:
First, they claim that the steps had a rail.
And says Rush on his show,
"The Shark's party was slow
Until Bill finally learned to inhale."
--- Jim Weaver Collection

When the White House physician inquired,
Bill panicked and had the guy fired.
His records were hidden,
The contents forbidden;
Would we find on cocaine he got wired?
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Clinton's angry and ready to spit;
Saw a youngster with cigarette lit.
It looked kind of funny
So Bill produced money.
"Hey Kid, can I please have a hit?"
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Once a Rhodie from Hope
Thought it within his scope
To make the government work.
My god, what a jerk!
And he said he never smoked dope!
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Make quick changes, that skill has been honed.
Pass the coke, we know Willy has moaned.
We have heard the reports
Back and forth while he snorts,
And Slick Willy makes no turn unstoned.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Please pass this to Bill for a blast;
The White House has quantities vast.
They have no concern;
So what if we learn,
Drug tests ended, 'cause nobody passed.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

You may criticize to no avail;
Clinton we try to unveil.
So decent so pure
And one thing for sure,
He smoked pot, but he didn't inhale!
--- Anon

Clinton, that sorry shit-ass,
Didn't inhale while smoking that grass?
Yeah, and O.J.'s no killer,
I've the hots for Phillis Diller,
And the Pope yells "Fuck You" during mass.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

We elected a slimeball from Hope;
His supporters say we don't vote for Pope.
So far that slogan works,
But my goodness, you jerks,
We don't want a guy who scored dope!
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Feeling his paramour's pain
And seeking no personal gain,
He showed in his fashion
Clintonic compassion
And offered to share his cocaine!
--- Anon

Dole says "Willy, you son of a pup!
No more cronies will give you heads up.
Though you still remain cool,
Over drugs we must duel.
Fifty paces then pee in the cup!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection

A slogan Bill needs for his edge,
So he'll really go out on a ledge.
From the dope charge he stalled;
His draft record recalled.
Some pot in each chicken's, his pledge.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

From smoking the kids should refrain.
Bill doesn't want them to complain.
But if quitting's too tough,
And their will's not enough,
His brother can get them cocaine.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

There's an Arkansas airport called Meena,
Which is in Mr. Clinton's arena.
Passing this domain
There was lots of cocaine,
For which he should be served a subpoena.
--- Popsicle TP9806

To the house of Sharline, Willy ran;
They had powder so fun soon began.
With cocaine, had a ball,
Then he slid down the wall,
And fell down in the old garbage can.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

When they finally are clean, we'll rejoice.
Tell the truth and they silence your voice.
Don't pee in the cup;
We'll cover it up.
White House Drug test is multiple choice.
--- Jim Weaver Collection a

Through the hearings, these people have sailed,
Yet we know that the truth has been veiled.
They must think that we're blind,
And I'm sure that we'll find
That the whole fucking cabinet inhaled!
--- Jim Weaver Collection

There once was a young man from Hope,
Who used to smoke lots of dope.
He just cannot see,
Falling for Lewinsky;
Will I vote for him again?...Nope!
--- Navin

When the lid on the Filegate thing blew,
Clinton said it was a "SNAFU".
He put the blame on
Some low-level pawn,
And then swore that was all that he knew.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Bill and Hillary are quiet as mice
As they follow their lawyer's advice.
In the meanwhile,
The FBI files
Have old Slick Willy's balls in a vice.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

What info did the White House compile
From those secretive FBI files?
And I wonder who'll wince
When they check them for prints?
Just the thought makes Republicans smile.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Slick Will shall soon write his life story;
No doubt, touting his own self-glory.
But don't be surprised
If we're not apprised
Of the full and complete inventory.
--- Observer

When we watch them in action we're sick;
It's the evil First Lady and Slick.
No files were taken;
We must be mistaken;
It's a wascally wepubwican twick.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

We may soon smell the odor of scorch
As Bill's pants feel the FBI torch.
When the facts are disclosed,
And veiled wrongs are exposed,
All Bill's dogs will take off for the porch!
--- Jim Weaver Collection


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