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It's said by some, that they smell fishy, A legman from Research Immoral From the office came newlywed Scott, There was an old fellow named Hicks There was a young fellow named Case, He was glad he had begun this affair, Canny linguist Rene from Alsace, The world's finest bookstores now have I remember the night that I ate (imbricate - overlapped at the margins)
I have eaten good dinners for years; Said the Bishop of Bonne, " 'Pon my word, A quick-tongued young fellow named Keating A horny Italian Pastor McDonalds? Too expensive a dish. Even though he has only a pinky, There was a young chap in Arabia, Said a wimpy Chinese lad, a twit, My honey can't hope to be sweeter; Muff-diving's like tasting champagne A great football player named Muntz Though seized from waist down by paralysis, A man with a yen for poontang, He insisted on kissing her there, A major in language, Miss Lee, There was a lewd fellow named Duff, She asked me if I could surmise, I get all my services free While favoring a lass with my tongue, In Africa, near the equator, A disgusting old man was McGyver, Bold cunnies are quite overrated. Oragenital expert MacStroup My boyfriend who lives in L.A. For my age I still act very young, I dated a man with no weiner, It's true, menstruation's a waste An invention produced by young Keith Mit Vergnugen! It's never with haste Yvonne found a small cunning dingus, A Swedish whoremonger named Bork There was a young priest in Morocco A pervy young fellow named Peter There once was a young man named Gough, I'm sure that you're big, tall, and strong, There was a young fellow of Alltree, (Four liner or maybe something missing? - McW)
A hostess I once knew just sings A habit neglected when young All of us big kahunas My big tongue will play masterpieces He complained to friend Herman Young, Well Tongueman you sure have been missed, I can give any girl A man with two tongues name of Luntz They found an Egyptian cartouche A young girl that smoked heavy, Miss Bright, There was a young man named O'Dare A clean-thinking fellow named Potts Since puberty, John's eaten twat; I've found that the female love juice An Asian who loved to eat nooky True orgasms from you I'll win, I'll lick your plate 'til it's clean; I'll lick just the tip of your finger, When a certain young lass was much younger, The clams are the best, that wear beards, Said Professor Emeritus Keaton, A Frenchman we know of in Natchez
But if served with a very nice missie,
There is no reason why
I should let it pass by;
I will even give it a hot kissie.
--- Anon
Got hung up, it appears, on the oral.
Asked to do the statistics
On cunnilinguistics,
He said, "I might give it whorel!"
--- G Legman G0860
While upstairs his wife waited, distraught.
And when he got inside,
Down the handrail she'd slide,
To prepare him a meal that was hot.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1292
Who dated a girl from the sticks.
Though they fought over straws,
It was not a lost cause,
For he said he got in a few licks.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0825
Who entered a cunt-lapping race.
He licked his way clean,
Through number thirteen
But then slipped and got pissed in the face.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024 G0835
As he bent her over the chair.
With her legs spread apart,
He could see that this tart
Was his favorite dessert, his eclair.
--- Charlotte
Had a tongue trained to fit in the space,
To unerringly hit,
The "G" spot in the slit,
For his effort was spit in the face.
--- Bob Giandomenico P0306
My newest book: 'Field trips with Trav';
It's all about hiking
And biking and liking
To lick the slick snatch of a Slav.
--- Travis Brasell
The girls' hockey team at Penn State.
I worked my way round
As they lay on the ground --
Not unlike a wild rose - imbricate.
--- Martin Wellborn P8309A
For the specials of chefs, give three cheers.
But nothing can beat
This delectable treat:
My head in a cunt to the ears.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-2406
When eating a cunt, it's absurd
To draw back or to flinch,
For you're clear a full inch
If you come face to face with a turd."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1116
Once gave a girl's clit such a beating
That she said in a daze,
"My snatch is ablaze."
Said he, "Must you smoke while I'm eating?"
--- Bob Giandomenico P9007
At cunnilingus was a master;
"When they lie on their backs,
And I lick their cracks,
They wiggle and squirm so much faster."
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Even value meals are on my list wish.
But I'd be just as happy
To eat on her 'nappy'.
Close my eyes and imagine it's fish.
--- Anon
He always has dates, Willie Winkie,
Ask any miss,
"Where did he kiss?"
They blush and say "Somewhere that's stinky!"
--- M Demers
Who courted a widow named Fabia.
"Yes, my tongue is as long
As the average man's dong.'
`e said, licking the lips of her labia.
--- G0824
"If ladies request, I do it.
They like fast or slow,
So that pace I go,
And comply, doing lickety-split."
--- Jane D Hughes P9301
I give her a kiss when I greet her.
And do, furthermore,
That which honey is for.
To wit: open her, spread her, and eat her.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
One must try every vintage, it's plain;
Take a sip, swirl it 'round,
Spit it out, 'til you've found
One you'd like to sip time and again.
--- Anon
Was famous for kicking big punts.
He teammates revealed
That off of the field,
His face was for pricking big cunts.
--- David Miller
His shrink cheered him with this analysis:
That when weak in the hips,
One will find that the lips
And the tongue as much fun as the phallus is.
--- Bob Giandomenico P8801
Who had him a really big whang,
Had his tongue in a twirl
And went down on a girl,
And she came with a really big bang.
--- Anon
Way down deep inside her pubic hair.
With practiced licks,
The clit he would flick
For orgasms were his favorite fare.
--- James Murray
Attended a school in Paris,
So she'd master the tongue,
But she said with head hung,
"I'm afraid that the tongue mastered me."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0848
Who loved to dive deep in the muff.
With his head in a whirl,
He said, "Spread it, Pearl!
I cunt get enough of the stuff!"
--- G0846
Why pubies are curled on hair pies.
The reason, I said,
As I gave her more head,
Is that straight ones would poke out your eyes.
--- Irish a
From the countess while over her knee.
In exchange for the thrashing,
She gets a tongue lashing,
For no one is better than me!
--- Peter Wilkins
Back before I was no longer young,
I so flittered and fluttered
That she came and then uttered,
"I don't care that you're not really hung."
--- John
A horny and handsome young waiter;
He charmed off the pants
From a woman from France,
And right there, on the table, he ate 'er.
--- Cap'n Bean
A crude and nasty muff diver!
He'd attend to a gash,
For twenty bucks cash,
Or lick your dog's ass for a fiver!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
But mind you, no twat's to be hated.
But fuzz on the peach
Puts "mmmm..." in my speech;
These pussies are best oraltated.
--- Anon
Licked a lady so well, she did poop.
His amazing technique
He developed last week,
And perfected while slurping his soup.
--- Albin Chaplin
Is stealing my heart away!
I'd sit on his face
If he'd just name the place.
He pleases me so much that way.
--- Lovs2Laf
This is file rhl
Like a lion from his cage when he's sprung.
Though my speed's not as fast
As it was in the past,
I am still in my prime with my tongue.
--- Anon
His ex could not have been meaner.
She got custody of
His organs of love,
But his tongue made a fine pussy cleaner.
--- TP9802
And can sometimes leave you red-faced.
I'm not talking about shame,
For no one's to blame;
When muff diving, there's no bad taste.
--- Anon
Was for men that licked girls underneath;
A most handy device
Which he sold at low price,
For removing the cunt hairs from teeth.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0843
That I tickle the taco and taste
Secretions so sweet,
From the labial treat,
And savor the morsels encased.
--- Anon
Which she gently caressed with her fingers.
And then with ambition,
She changed her position
And tried some auto-cunnilingus
--- Archie
Had a seven foot tongue like a fork.
Four tarts he'd array,
Like sardines on a tray,
And concurrently do clitty torque.
--- H Welchel
Whose motto was always quite macho.
He said, "To be blunt,
I will eat your cunt.
Why else 'twould be shaped like a taco?"
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Claimed to be the world's best pussy eater.
Said, "I'll lick a puss
With a long, hairy bush,
But snackin' on a shaved one is neater."
--- Possum
An expert in diving the muff.
He'd lick and he'd wiggle,
And his girl would wriggle,
And squirm, till he cried, "That's enough!"
--- Scott Oliver
And proud of the size of your dong.
But the man I adore
Is all that and more.
(And his tongue is six inches long!)
--- Ericka
Whose parts were but puny and paltry.
But he knew how to do
A neat gobbledegoo.
[. . . . . . . . . . . cetera desunt]
--- L1365
When sighting her favorite things.
I'd give her a hand
For a take-off on land,
Then soar while I'm spreading her wings.
--- Frank Sfa
Was clitoral use of the tongue.
But now that I'm old,
I've struck liquid gold,
And many fat ladies have sung.
--- Anon
Like removing a girl's pantaloonas,
Then spreading her lips
With fingertips,
To dive for a swim with the tunas.
--- MrMalo a
All over you, if the thought pleases.
When your organ groans
And her owner moans,
I'll know that I've reached the right creases.
--- Anon
That lack of sex left him unstrung.
Said Herm, "Pencil dick,
Just learn a new trick;
The ladies go wild for my tongue."
--- Anon
There's no one around who can twist
Their tongue in a knot,
Right on that hot spot;
There isn't a girl who'd resist.
--- Anon
An unforgettable whirl.
It's not that I'm hung,
It's more that my tongue
Is twelve inches long when unfurled!
--- Mike M TP9802
In speaking performed fancy stunts.
On a flute he could trill
While he sang with great skill,
Or could lick on two pussies at once.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0852
Concerning a gent, Scaramouche.
He was born with two tongues,
So could probe ladies' bungs
While providing their loins gamahouche.
--- Anon
Had a nicotine cunt -- 'twas a fright.
A bold fellow from Wheatley
Learned to eat it discreetly,
After licking an ashtray each night.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0795
Who maintained his teeth in repair.
After eating a snack
He would brush front and back,
But the brush that he used was for hair.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1283
Would not entertain evil thoughts,
So he went everyplace
With a mask on his face,
For concealing his tongue which licked twats.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0868
Young girls on his menu a lot;
And needing no urgin',
He know that a virgin
Tastes better than those who are not.
--- David Miller
Gets better with age and with use.
And take it from me,
By age forty three,
It has to be durnk from a sluice.
--- SFA
Was considerably more than a rookie.
He said with a frown,
As he dove on back down,
"I would like a snatch fortune cookie."
--- Gary Columbus
And I say this while wiping my chin.
For only I know
How your juices do flow --
There's no faking that wetness within!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
With my tongue, I'll give it a sheen.
Not a drop will spill,
While you get your fill.
When I am through, you will beam!
--- Anon
Then find other places to linger
Along the slow route.
I doubt you'll stay mute
When I tongue your clit with my zinger.
--- Anon
She requested a fellow to tongue 'er.
He was two inches deep
And then fell asleep;
An event that completely unstrung 'er.
--- Isaac Asimov
But they never are eaten by weirds,
Who avoid them like fiends,
And are probably queens:
Those sissified, dandified skeereds!
--- Anon
"Some contend Polish cunt can't be beaten,
But I've written a paper
On the bowling ball caper.
In a pinch bowling balls can be eaten."
--- Albin Chaplin
Has asthma attacks by the batches.
We heard that, Good Grief!
His only relief
Is actually breathing in snatches.
--- Jane D Hughes P9111 a
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