Turn Backward, O Time, Backward turn While in Athens, a tourist named Joan, A Greek--let us call him Silvanus-- In Athens, the tour guide reminds you I knows of the French and the Greek, There was a Greek ruler named Solon, Regarding Ed's Grecian sojourn-- There was a young girl from Quebec In checking the Websters for SODOMY, A frustrated lady of Berne The long-peckered Bey of Algiers This two-balled old Bey of Algiers. A native of Havre de Grace, (Published 1879)
There was a young fellow whose mode Confessed an old cripple named Bruce, Alfresco, I've done dancing disco, Three girly-men, all dressed in leather, There was an old man of Madrid, (He out with his cock, and he did.)
Those Aussies are such funny folk; (ockers - boorish Aussie men)
There was a young man from South Bend Hold back with that downward turned thumb! His plain quarter-pounder was fat, A tourist in Rome, from South Bend, Young Will warbled tunes from his throat, An adulterous lecher from Bend There was a young man named Carruthers You know just what I want to do; You are not the first one, my dear, There once was a bugger named Russel There once was a bellhop named Goose, I sing of the brothers DeBeers, There was an old man named Grasty, There was a young fellow of King's,
This is file qnm
There was a young parson named Bings, There was a young rector of Kings l thank you! Now that's a good fellow Said a pederast in cellblock three, "Indeed," quoth the King of Siam, A diarrhoetic young sodomite said There was an old man with fat jowls, A horny musician named Heft We are nearing the end of the year; An old friend by the name of West, My crank is as massive as China. There was an old preacher named Cole There once was a sinister Ottoman, I've taken what shit that you gave Ms McCann's fey son, Phil, was a fan There was a young man from Wanamee, A very gay fellow named Lance, Oh yes, we confess we've been seekin' "You're wicked, evil and vile," In Scotland each sturdy male Celt I once met this girl called Monique There was a young student of Oriel, John Miller's poor mom has just freaked; My mommy, I fear, is quite dead My mom died when I was just two; Said a fruity young man name of Biggle, (Said Oscar McDingle O'Figgle - reference to Oscar Wilde)
It's silly to hold such a grudge, A hereto fellow named Jewel There once were two brothers named Luntz, It seems a fat homo of Bentree Then two assholes suddenly appeared Two gay contortionist friends There once was a young man from Kent, The announcement came out of the blue;
And tell us why Greeks Backward yearn.
In orgies Olympus,
Did Gods cry, "O limp us,"
And all other apertures spurn?
--- Irving Superior P9210
Told her guide, with a trace of a groan,
"Though a fuck is just fine
When I'm lying supine,
It's a pain in the ass when I'm prone."
--- Playboy Mag J F O'Conner
Is strange: he has one extra anus.
The one up in front
Can be used as a cunt,
Which makes him a queer sort of Janus.
--- G2505
To always keep looking behind you.
Like pickpockets pick
And Superman quick,
A blink and they'll start to...behind you.
--- Irving Superior P9210
But these Portuguese about whom you speak,
It gives me a puzzle.
Does they start with a nuzzle,
And end with a poke on the cheek?
--- Q
With a fondness for joys that were stolen.
He claimed Alcibiades,
Whom he buggered on Fri-a-days,
Had the nicest tight ass for cornholin'.
--- G1044
His doctor said, "If you return,
And if you go walking,
They're everywhere stalking.
So Vaseline or it will burn.
--- Irving Superior P9210
Who preferred to make love 'a la Greque'.
To this method perverse
Was a waltz in reverse,
As composed by a prominent Czech.
--- Albin Chaplin
"In sexing, when using hole number three"
Then further defined
With quote marks, "behind,"
And ends with the words, "it's all Greek to me."
--- Irving Superior P9210
Had problems that cause her concern.
She married a Greek
Who male partners did seek,
And she knew not which way she should turn.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0904a
Loved to spear chubby lads in their rears.
A demon for semen,
This buggersome he-man
Shot the chute till it seeped from their ears.
--- G0927
Sent his head eunuch shopping for queers.
"Mohammed," he smirked,
As he casually jerked,
"Just be sure they have overdrive rears!"
--- G0928
Once tired of cunt, said, "I'll try ass."
He unfolded his plan
To another young man,
Who said, "Most decidedly, my ass!"
--- L0473
Was taking it up the dirt road.
He maintained pedication
Cured acute constipation,
And no enema beat a good load.
--- G1015
"Can't even get chicks who are loose.
It may seem a bit odd of me,
But I'm deep into sodomy;
It's cheap and it beats self abuse."
--- Armand Singer
While visiting in San Francisco.
Twirl, bump, grind and thump,
A sharp pain in my rump.
Bent over, you better use Crisco!
--- Anon
Tied Hans and Franz firmly together.
'Pumped them up' all night long,
Though they started out strong,
Now they're so tired, they can't lift a feather.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who cast loving eyes on a kid.
He said, "Oh, my joy!
I'll bugger that boy,
You see if I don't." And he did.
--- Norman Douglas L0487
They think it's the sheep Kiwis poke.
In reality.
It's Ockers who we
Screw - yet they don't get the joke!
--- Anon
Who wanted to bugger a friend.
His friend, a bit nervous
About anal service,
Agreed it felt good in the end.
--- Limericks Naughty & Gay
Thrust onward and don't be so glum.
You'll work up a lather
Of thick fanny batter,
Then flip and repeat with 'er bum!
--- Anon
So he rammed it in where she sat.
Then heard her exclaim
The moment he came,
"I really would like fries with that."
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Decried sodomy to an old friend.
Leered a visiting Bulgar:
"Sir, you may say it's vulgar,
But you'll find that it's fun, in the end."
--- G0669
And girlies all phoned in their vote,
At 10 pence a throw.
Now they don't want to know,
Since they've found he's been browning his choat.
--- Anon
(as he filled Mrs Day, squirting spend)
Remarked with a leer,
"I go for the rear:
There is nothing beats sex at Day's end."
--- Armand Singer P0203
Who buggered two crippled twin brothers.
And he felt some surprise,
As you may surmise,
When they both announced: "We are mothers!"
--- G0943
Just don't get upset with the goo.
Be a good lass;
Let me stick it up your ass;
It will make you quite happy too.
--- Julie
Who has expressed a desire for my rear.
We could have more fun
For aren't you the one
That can stretch all his tongue to his ear.
--- Julie
Who adored a tight anal muscle.
To enter with ease
Required bear grease,
With that tool, 'twas a real hustle-bustle.
--- G1039
Who had morals extremely loose.
His portal of choice,
As he often would voice,
Was to put it right in your caboose!
--- J T. Snake
A pair of incestuous queers,
Who, citing the dangers
Of sex with male strangers,
Reserved it for each other's rears.
--- Armand E Singer 842
Whose favorite sport -- pederasty.
He'd bugger with joy
Any innocent boy,
But thought fornication was nasty.
--- L0472 G1001
Who was weary of women and things.
Said he, "My desire,
Is a boy from the choir,
With an ass that's like Jello on springs."
--- L0553
Who talked about God and such things;
But his secret desire
Was a boy in the choir,
With a bottom like jelly on springs.
--- Anon
Whose mind was on heavenly things,
But his heart was on fire
For a boy in the choir
Whose ass was like jelly on springs.
But, Sir, it has got to be JELLO.
That jiggles on springs,
Like cute other things
That make horny gentlemen bellow
"I'm as happy as I ever could be.
On the outside, it's rough
To get half enough--
Inside, the judge sends them to me."
--- Arthur Deex P8909
"For cunts I just don't give a damn.
They haven't the grip,
Nor the velvety tip,
Nor the scope of the asshole of man."
--- L0512
To a nancy-boy sharing his bed,
"I regret that I find
That your spunk doesn't bind,
So leave in your penis instead."
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who said, as he spread out the towels:
"I know pederasty
Is sometimes thought nasty,
But think how it loosens the bowels."
--- G0988
With his packer was sharp and so deft.
But he thought nothing finer
Than to stick a lad minor,
For the asshole was his major cleft.
--- Albin Chaplin
So I wish all the limerists were here.
Great guidance from heaven,
A great ninety-seven --
And a twenty inch cock up your rear!
--- Writerman
Thought that anal sex was the best.
"It's clean as a whistle",
As he looked at his pizzle,
"All the chunks they get caught in her nest!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection
It hurts when I poke your behina.
But if you'd just push,
Relaxing your tush,
You'd never feel nuttin' mo' fina.
--- Anon
Who did what was good for the soul:
Pederasty, his game,
Which he did without shame.
He was good, so they say, on the hole.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0913
To the fair sex, I fear, he was not a man.
He evaded the charms
Of feminine arms,
"Quite frankly," he said, "I'm a bottom man."
--- G1028
And smeared it the length of my stave.
It's just a veneer -
Please give us more, dear.
I've got a turd highway to pave.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Of rear assaults which he would plan.
While attempting to spear (And once while astride)
A gay friend in the rear, (A sissy friend cried,)
His friend cried, "Oh, Phillip McCann!" (I love you, dear..)
--- Bob Giandomenico P9104
Well schooled in the technique of sodomy.
He buggered with glee,
An old man in a tree,
And remarked with a shrug, "Won't you pardon me?"
--- L1619
Would respond to the slightest advance.
It took too long to strip,
So he'd urge men to slip
Their tool through a hole in his pants.
--- L0492
A way to make money so we can
Afford a large loophole,
To cram up your poophole,
Until your tight asswalls all weaken.
--- Anon
Yelled Jane, "and a big glob of bile
For screwing my ass!
For payback, alas,
I'll suck your damn cock for awhile!"
--- Travis Brasell
Wore nothing except a fur pelt.
They buggered the sheep
And men in their sleep,
Enjoying the way that it felt.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who advised me on sexual technique.
Oral sex, she did say
Can make your whole day;
Anal sex can make your whole week.
--- Friar TP9802a
Who flouted all rulings proctorial.
He ran down the Corn
With a hell of a horn,
And buggered the Martyr's Memorial.
--- L1506
Some bad news to her has been leaked;
Twenty thousand bucks bail
To free Johnny from jail,
For tail-gating the last time he streaked.
--- David Miller
And my Oedipus complex, instead,
I slake at full moon
On a wrinkled baboon;
On the new moon, a moose give me head.
--- John Miller
I was adopted by new parents who;
Alas, finally went
In a car accident,
So that makes me one up on you.
--- David Miller
With an almost hysterical giggle,
"Last night I was sick
With delight when my prick
Felt Brucie's delicious ass wriggle!"
--- L0499
With matters of packing of fudge.
It may be a sin,
But getting it in?
It's hard for an anus to budge.
--- Jayne
Says a twat's the best place for his tool.
But his brother, named Ray,
Who is openly gay,
Is a fan of the Tunnel of Stool.
--- Cap'n Bean
Who buggered each other at once.
When asked to account
For this intricate mount,
They said, "Ass holes are tighter than cunts."
--- L0316
Traffics nightly with pederast gentry.
It may strike you as frightful,
But he finds it delightful,
As they Vaseline up his rear entry.
--- G0935
And eavesdropped as closer they neared.,
"A coincidence, odd,"
Said one, with a nod,
"Right here is the place we were reared."
--- Hugh Clary
Could make the most elegant bends.
They did it so well,
It became hard to tell
Who had fucked whom in the end.
--- MrMalo
Who had trouble paying the rent.
He went out with a smile
And returned in a while,
With his anal virginity spent.
--- Observer
"Two gay zoophiles in the crew!"
The keepers looked 'round
And finally found
A zoo in a zoo in a zoo!
--- Jim Weaver Collection