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Said the groom, "Please believe me my dear, "No matter," said Aunt Mary Jo, No need to be rude 'cause you're rusty Do not fret since you're small in such haste, On the breast size, attention's misplaced; There are breasts of a size to be propped, A flat female, baring her chest, Wailed Van der Rohe's daughter, Ms. Mitty, His lover had very small breasts, Her hair was her joy and her pride, On her wedding night, said a young bride, (probably of starvation - McW)
In the quaint little town of Biarritz Those implants just don't look the same, There once was a woman named Nor, Obviously I have good taste, My friends are all hooting and mocking I guess we have similar taste; My membrum virile's too minute The flat-chested girl felt so rotten, Tired of A-cups, poor Shirley U. Geste There was a young lady named March The con man who'd never INGRATIATE, There once was a girl from St. Paul, A limerick point can be smart A flat-chested tart from Vancouver A proud mother, whose name was Hermione, A flat-chested girl of Noorat Anorexic in lingerie, Kay The rhymes, dear, you won't find in books, A crazy young student named Pitts "Oh, Darling, you have such warm hands." A deluded young man of Trieste It's easy to be full of glee A lass named Veronica Mapes, So much for that "Size doesn't matter," A surfer who scores on St. Kitts, "When breasts are," said Dr St. Pellans, There once was a fellow named Blatt Fair Jennifer's hair is beyond compare; A flat-chested girl was denied A lass with small breasts wished to raise them, A skinny young lass on a whim Said a girl who bought things at Gimbels, Young Kate from the village of Totham A bee sting, a blister, a bite. An unfortunate woman from Bramalea, A man there was from Kansas City, There was a young girl named Dinwiddie, "Now Johnny," said dad, "Mrs Beecham Now Ermintrude's real well endowed, ...He do it, she must have been slack, There once was a whore of Belize, "No marriage!" they said, "It's the pits! Enormous Joanne was a whore, There once was a young girl called Kate, A ripening lady named Grace, Reminds me of Jane, growing older, Old Buford, observing that sight, There was an old lady of Clapham When younger, that lady would tease She never shows any compunction A loathsome young lass named Nelly, A cute go-go dancer named Kit Have you heard of the buxom Miss Keyes, Big-busted Amelia Shawm Every time Lady Lowbodice swoons, Her titties were double DD's.
You have nothing whatever to fear!"
But his bride sadly said,
"It's the nothing I dread
That you'll see when I doff my brassiere!"
--- Goldie Tusselman P8302
"If you've no chest attractive to show.
Just puff up your vest
And you'll look your cute best,
And haul in the boys with the dough."
--- Mike O'Conner
At dealing with gal's who ain't lusty.
My feelings are hurt --
I know you won't flirt
With me just because I'm not busty.
--- Anon
To think less of yourself is bad taste,
When it comes to your bust,
In this put your trust,
Anymore than a mouthful's a waste!
--- Anon
It's all, friend, a matter of taste;
More than one, less than three;
Side-by-side, hanging free;
But all of it, please, 'bove the waist!
--- Anon
Some so large that my eyes indeed popped,
But in time they will drag,
'Neath the waist they will sag,
Like two melons that must have been dropped.
--- Anon
Confessed disdain for the usual test.
"No natural selection
By the size of erection,
For the biggest ain't always the best."
--- Kathleen Martin P8809a
"Regard the small size of this titty;
And what of it's mate,
In no better state? --
Dad, less isn't more, more's the pity!"
--- Armand E Singer 738
And in spite of her tepid requests,
He started in feasting
On her lovely bee-stings,
And she made some lusty requests.
--- Al Willis T9710
And her beauty could not be denied.
But her breasts were so small,
They became her downfall.
They resembled a pair of eggs, fried.
--- Al Willis
"My appearance was not bona fide.
Though I tried to augment
This most special event,
I regret that my living bra died!"
--- Observer TP9901
Lives a girl with two very small tits.
I don't think I'd mind them
If once I could find them.
Why, once I mistook them for zits.
--- Al Willis a
As any real natural dame.
And now Erm is slimming,
Her bra isn't brimming
With flesh, it's a criminal shame.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Whose chest was as flat as the floor.
It is sad to be said
That in dark, in the bed,
Men sucked on her shoulder blades more.
--- Lims For Year - 01
And I do not speak in haste.
Whilst handling tit,
In hands they must fit,
'Cause more than a mouthful's a waste.
--- Jayne
My choice of young girls for defrocking.
They all have small tits,
But I think that it's
All the same, when your bed starts rocking.
--- David Miller
I also would never make haste
To get up and flee
A girl with mere "B",
'Cause more than a mouthful's a waste.
--- David Miller
For a woman's cunt, shaved or hirsute;
And I can attest
That big breasts are best
As a soapy-tit-wank substitute.
--- Jester Jon
After a date she finally had gotten.
But God's oversight
Served the bastard right,
When he'd gotten a mouthful of cotton!
--- Laurence Craft
Sought to purchase a burly new chest.
Well her doctor threw fits:
"What, me transplant tits?
Oh Shirley, but surely you jest!"
--- Norm Storer
Whose mien was exceedingly arch,
But her breastwork dimensions
Would be helped by attentions
From either brassiere or some starch.
--- Cliff Rather P9009a
With models young and emaciate,
Can never be happy,
As was his dear pappy,
For their mammae never satiate.
--- Daniel Ford
Whose breasts were so firm and so small,
Hubby said "My dear,
Please burn your brassiere;
It's performing no function at all."
--- Isaac Asimov
In describing the cle(a)verest art,
When there isn't a vestige
Of feminine breastage
On the girls who parade in the mart.
--- Arthur Deex P8311
Took silicone shots to improve her.
But alas the effects
Were concave, not convex,
Which utterly spoilt her whore d'oeuvre.
--- Hugh Oliver 105a
Had her hopes all glistening and shione,
That her daughter, young Erica,
Would become Miss America;
But alas, the girl's breasts were too tione.
--- Isaac Asimov
Loved a sensual fellow named Tat.
Friends said, "This affair
Won't get anywhere--
She hasn't enough tit for Tat."
--- Robust Ribald Rude P9703
Would languidly lounge through the day,
Bemusing her suitors
With glimpses of hooters,
That measured no more than an "A".
--- Norm Storer
But in the back of your head where it cooks.
So take off your sweater
'Cause I've got a better
Surprise that is "harder than it looks."
--- Anon
Went all over school popping zits.
They put him away
One Friday last May,
For popping a cheerleader's tits.
--- David Miller
"Yeah. Where are your mammary glands?
Good grief, you're flat-chested!
I thought you were breasted.
Your bras are made of rubber bands!"
--- Marlene Lewis
Was impressed by his ladyfriend's breast.
But he soon was distressed
And he lost all his zest;
She came out second best when undressed.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0361
When your bra is a 42-D.
But the gal worthwhile
Is the gal who can smile
With bosoms the size of a pea.
--- Larry Wilde P8909
This is file ptm
Sported mammae the size of small grapes.
She started to scratch 'em,
In an effort to hatch 'em,
Till all that remained were the scrapes.
--- G0398
And all of that "Small is cute" chatter.
Who wants them great big?
Some guy who's a pig
And who never would flatter flatter.
--- Marlene Lewis
Refuses to ski St. Moritz,
Claiming babes on the beaches
Have perkies like peaches,
While the tiny Swiss nubbies St. Tits.
--- Travis Brasell
Enlarged to the size of St. Helens
Big peaks, just for show,
Let everyone know
Those mountains from molehills St. Melons
--- Travis Brasell
Whose girlfriend was built rather flat.
But I've heard that he'll say
To his friends any day,
"I'm glad to exchange teat for twat."
--- G0259
Her eyes are bright and shiny.
Her lips are divine,
In fact, she'd be fine
If only her tits weren't so tiny!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Entree to a nudist camp pride.
After being so bold
To bare breasts, she was told
That hers was a tit to be fied.
--- Bob Giandomenico P9410
For when guys saw their size, it would faze them.
Till a lad, Mark by name,
Said he swore that he came
Not to seize her berries, but to praise them!
--- Stargazer
One morning went topless to swim.
The men she'd have wowed
Thought her underendowed,
And many took her for a him.
--- Pedro J Saavedra P8210 A
"Men all think of sex and sex symbols.
And they just feel disgust
For my tiny, wee bust--
For brassieres, all I use are two thimbles."
--- Grand Prix Lim 522 G0342
Has far less up top than at bottom;
In fact so much less
That it's anyone's guess
As to whether she's got 'em or not'm.
--- Anon
Over anything which seems it might
Swell up quite a bit,
She thinks is a tit
And staples a bra at that site.
--- Anon
Was flat where she should have been mammally.
She shared her stuffed bras
With her sisters, because
This attribute ran in her family.
--- Alex Heydon P0506
Who dreamed all his life of big titty.
He drooled with a grin
As he wiped off his chin,
And played with his wife's itty bitty.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
With a brace of voluptuous titty.
But the boys squeezed them so,
That they hung down below,
And one drooped behind and got shitty.
--- L1157
Has lessons you'll love -- she can teach 'em.
Besides the old bag
Has big boobs that sag;
The short boys in class call all reach 'em.
--- Travis Brasell
Of tits, and is suitably proud.
Of this recreation.
I've tried emulation,
But failed, and I don't know how'd...
--- Anon
Her bosom just two empty sacks.
To stuff her old dugs
In each of his lugs;
Of substance there must be a lack.
--- Anon
Whose tits carried down to her knees.
While showing her pair,
Saying, "They pay to stare,
For not a man can handle these."
--- Phil T
Our commitment's as firm as it gits!"
But it sagged as time passed
When his flag flew half-mast,
And she sported now-navel-length tits!
--- Ann Gasser P8711a
Whose breasts reached right down to the floor.
So she pushed them along,
For her back, it was strong;
But bejaysis her nipples were sore.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who was shy and demure, but looked great!
But when she was older,
And randy, and bolder,
Her tits had begun to migrate.
--- Loz
Had methods to hide aging pace.
Her system was flawless;
She always went bra-less
To smooth the age lines in her face.
--- Observer
Whose methods were, I think, even bolder.
She shouted "Hurrah!
Tossed over her bra,
And threw her tits over her shoulder.
--- John Miller
And trying to be quite polite,
Then stated to Jane,
"No need to explain.
I know it's real windy tonight!"
--- Observer
Who oft took her tits out to flap 'em,
And cool herself off;
But should anyone scoff,
Then she'd use 'em, quite rightly, to slap 'em.
--- Anon
The boys with her 44d's.
But as she got older
They drooped from her shoulder,
And now they are down by her knees
--- Anon
For havoc caused 'round Clapham Junction.
The railway men say
It's her mammary sway
That causes the trains to malfunction.
--- Anon
Had teats that would wobble like jelly.
They could tickle her twat,
Or be tied in a knot,
And could even swat flies on her belly.
--- L1498
Grew a tooth on the front of one tit!
A swinger named Jack
Said he planned an attack.
Kit said, "Jack, if you do, you'll get bit!"
--- Don Tidwell
Who was proud of her tits, if you please?
Not to seem arbitrary,
But they weren't ordinary,
For they hung all the way to her knees.
--- Al Chaplin P0310
Went bra-less, though ample of form.
But as Amy aged,
Her bosom, uncaged,
Went south, now they keep her knees warm.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Her bubbies pop out like balloons;
But her butler, the cad,
A most forward lad,
Grabs 'em and plays "Kiss the prunes.".
--- Arthur Deex P0001
In her bra-burning days of ease.
Now when she walks,
Her lumbar joint balks,
And her tits interfere with her knees.
--- MrMalo
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