Your thoughts on that Doggy appalls Trust you'll let faithful old Rover Well suddenly look who appears! I try to envision this scene; It's years since you've seen me? No way! Yes, Archie, I'm single and free, Now you're free of sexual disease, Randog and Carol went to bed, I've died and to heaven I've gone. I debate with myself should I duck I see that the Tongueman is back; Good God! They all said you were dead Not dead that I knowed, but berefth What happened to Pete's love so great I remember once upon a time, Not heeding supply and demand, My dear Doctor Petal I seek ...At the centerfold spread in a Play- Doctor Petal, oh will you take pity? Though pics are mere fantasy fiction, So take down my undershorts please, Slap me hard till my butt-cheeks turn red. It couln't have been me falling in You might have imagined it, pet, It wasn't mad Pete who fell in, I purchased a good rubber mask When tried, it all worked like a dream; You'll just have to wait until Sat- What? Under my hat? Yes, I know The problem is people; they stare But aren't you a qualified Doc If my Psych advice you do seek, You may feel a bit creepy,
This is file pol
Your first love was a girl named Maureen; Oh Peter, I felt we were bonding -- Now you've started talking again. I can't believe we've spent seven days So sorry, your treatment must cease! I'm a satire just waitin' to happen It sure is the edge of good taste I have just declared a jihad To AOL'ers you discount your stuff? We do not need all your arse peeves, The Lord of the Flies got a swat! I once had a pig that could fly. Pathetic attempts leave me bored. You're not twisted dipshit -- You're lame, Beelzebub's neck's in a noose! I passed on your message to Gates, Piss off with your ads for cd's! You've just made a deadly mistake; Dear Carl, your limericks do suck; If only I could have three wishes, To you it might sound a bit crass, Your spam we find cruder than crude; No, sonny boy, God don't love spammers What a pleasure to tell you good-bye! If only you'd let us, dear Daily, But in commerce you're clearly engaging, Guess what! I just couldn't care less; Devoid of all harshness of feeling, Defender seems quite out of sorts; The mother of Malo was crude, What they say, they'd best say in rhyme, I hope for your sake, Paddy boy, An advertisement it's not;
Me more than their pissing on walls.
But I got your cure;
If you can endure
The thought of me licking my balls.
--- Anon
Give you a good seein' to all over.
Once he's got his bone in
He'll sure have you groanin',
And happy as piggy in clover.
--- Anon
Gearhart I've not seen you in years,
I'll not hang around,
Your mangy old hound,
If you let me scratch your cute ears.
--- Anon
Frank bent in a position obscene.
T'would be quite the trick,
If you were to lick,
Your own balls; I hope that they're clean.
--- Anon
I'm with you most everyday.
I guess there's no doubt
I've fucked your brains out,
A little bit more with each lay.
--- Anon
And honey, I'd sure like to be
Down under with you,
To have a nice screw,
On a hot sandy beach by the sea.
--- Carol
No longer will I have to tease.
It's time to proceed
With the dirty deed.
I'll savor you with expertise.
--- Randog
Where he received plenty of head.
And he fill her night
With hours of delight.
Will this be the end of the thread?
--- Carol
You slaked every need, dusk to dawn.
Let's put this to bed;
It was a good thread.
Lots more in the future we'll spawn.
--- Randog
This subject or wade through the muck,
And raise a big stink,
When I say that I think
That this was a pure pity fuck.
--- Goin2
His posting has really been slack.
I guess he's been off
With Carol to boff,
And licking and lapping her crack.
--- Anon
Or wrapped up quite snugly in bed.
The truth is now out
You're back from a bout
Of giving sweet Carol some head!
Of hope and that'th why here I lefth.
The rumorth that path
Through thith plath like gath,
Through my ath smelth juth like your breafth.
That flourished back in '98?
Once Erika craved
The nob that he waved,
But now he hunts teenage jailbait.
--- Randog
All AJL girls were in line
At the door of Peter
For his bulging meter,
And kisses that tasted like wine.
--- Carol
The lad wrote himself to a stand.
And now, it seem age
Has tempered his rage,
But not female flames that he fanned.
--- SFA
Your advice. Though it's barely a week
Since you told me I'm cured
And to D-cups inured.
I'm afraid I've been taking a peek...
--- Peter Wilkins
Boy which leaped from a news-stand today.
Can you guess where it land-
Ed? Yes, right in my hand!
So I bought it and took it away.
--- Peter Wilkins
I'm weak and addicted to titty;
Been licking the pages
Of Playboy for ages.
They're soggy and taste rather shitty.
--- Peter Wilkins
I just cannot help my addiction.
So maybe I need
Reprimanding; indeed
It may cure me if done with conviction.
--- Peter Wilkins
And I'll bend myself over you knees.
If you thrash my behind
With some vigor, you'll find
It may cure my obsession with ease.
--- Peter Wilkins
(Surreptitiously under the bed
I have hidden that Play-
Boy I purchased today,
And I'll peek at that centerfold spread.)
--- Peter Wilkins
For I'm free of all sexual sin.
After promising Doc
I'd take care of my cock.
Was it not my identical twin?
--- Peter Wilkins
It that state of high tension you get,
When you're squirming around
With a whimpering sound,
As you panties get thoroghly wet.
--- Peter Wilkins
Nor yet his identical twin.
If you've not guessed yet,
Who got you all wet,
Then list to the tale that I spin.
--- Archie
Of Peter. I then had the task
Of buying red scanties,
'Cause if I was Andantes,
My name you would not think to ask!
--- Archie
When I dropped in, you failed to scream!
We quickly got set,
Removed panties, wet.
While I screwed, I was not who I seemed.
--- Archie
urday; then I'll be free to do that
Which you're craving, my dear,
With my stiffening spear;
But till then it stays under my hat.
--- Peter Wilkins
It's absurd, but my touser commo-
tion embarrasses me
When those 44D
Cups I see, make my hollyhock grow.
--- Peter Wilkins
Like they know what I'm hiding down there;
And they laugh as they watch
Me adjusting my crotch.
And it fills me with deepest dispair.
--- Peter Wilkins
Of Psychology, used to the shock
Of perversions much worse
Than the one which I nurse.
And which causes a bulge in my jock?
--- Peter Wilkins
Then we can't have sex for a week.
The privileged talk
Between patient and Doc,
Requires concentration unique.
--- Ericka
And sometimes laughy or weepy,
But once hypnotized,
You'll tell me no lies.
Now, my dear, you're getting sleepy.
--- Ericka
You were both just shy of sixteen.
She'd OK a fondle,
but you went beyond all,
And sucked both her nipples off clean.
--- Ericka
Why have you stopped responding?
You need stimulation?
Professional fellation?
We Psychs call that "Magic Wanding!"
--- Ericka
Let's try to analyze his brain.
His nursury nanny
Had bazooms uncanny.
(You don't need me to explain.)
--- Ericka
In this post-hypnotic haze.
But please rest assured
I pronounce you cured.
(But I'm in a sexual daze.)
--- Ericka
I've aches of my own that need ease!
Share this couch, lover,
My turn to recover!
Now probe me all night, if you please.
--- Ericka
And poets here rush in to flap, and
They crap and they fart
On the Gingerful-art
That you've posted, as if in a crap-in.
--- Anon
To use up our bandwidth and waste
Our time and our cash.
You deserve a good lash
And fingers all glued with some paste.
--- Archie
On writers whose postings are bad.
If you post in prose
Then anything goes --
I'm angry, upset and I'm mad!
--- Anon
Life can be painful and tough,
But to pander your jokes
To those pitiful folks?
They've already suffered enough!
--- John Miller
And no formal dressing too, please.
The bare minimum we say,
That goes off anyway,
Use clean language folks -- avoid sleaze!
--- Anon
He's a devil! A god he is not!
No way a hero?
An absolute zero?
He surely deserves what he got.
--- Observer
Slick Willie ne'er once told a lie.
Saddam's not insane.
Roseanne's not a pain.
Beelzebub's a really nice guy.
--- Pookie
It is no surprise you've been gored.
Back out of the light,
Till you have learned to write.
I think you had best be ignored.
--- Frank Fazed
Deserving of more than a flame.
We'll shove your free beers
Deep into your ears,
And you've only yourself to blame.
--- Anon
He may think of calling a truce.
If flames make him bitter,
He might then consider
Changing his name to Bubba or Bruce!
--- Redneck
'Cause suckholes like you he castrates.
And then he builds pyres
Of petrol and tyres,
And laughs while your body cremates.
--- Archie
They're worse than the ones on TV's;
I hope you get the pox,
And foot-rot in your socks,
Then get cancer from pvc's.
--- Anon
The last one that you'll ever make.
For now with my trusty
Old penknife, so rusty,
I'll hack off your testicles, Jake.
--- Peter Wilkins
Their rhythm, the crash of a truck.
Try hard to be rude,
And more so, be lewd,
And never censor the word FUCK.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
I'd first serve you up on small dishes.
Next, concrete overshoes,
So your body we'd lose.
Last, I'd send you off to the fishes!
--- Archie
Or completely lacking in class.
Hang on to your shorts,
One of our cohorts
Is likely to just crisp your ass.
--- Frank Fazed
Once more I am forced to allude
To what we might do
To spammers like you --
The prospects, some say, are too lewd.
--- John Miller
Like you, with your recycled yammers.
In time, son, I'm sure
He'll get his friend Thor,
To crush up your bollocks with hammers.
--- Tiddy Ogg
You're not welcome, I tell you no lie!
And so, if you please,
Just take your disease,
And keep it, and curl up and die.
--- Anon
Escape from your clutches so scaly;
Though we scorch you with flame,
You persist, all the same -
Must I ask with my hardened shillelagh?
--- Anon
In this battle to spam us you're waging,
When you ask for donations
For your wild accusations,
And cookies are sent from your paging.
--- Anon
You belong in a pit full of cess.
And care for my karma
Means I should do harma
To fools who just litter and mess.
--- Anon
I chundered at "Piss on the ceiling".
I'll give him a chance,
Although if he pants
Like Cerebus, I'll leave him still reeling.
--- Archie
His balls must be caught in his shorts.
His coffee should be
I think, caffeine free,
If through this group, he want to cavorts.
--- RidgeNOrfg
And raised up a very large brood
With different fathers.
She screwed in hot lathers;
Semen stains were all that she chewed.
--- Archie
'Cause otherwise we've got no time
For reading your crap,
You damn dim-bulb sap.
What you've stuck in here is a crime!
--- Anon
You're speaking in rhyme. You annoy
By posting prose crap,
You dim-witted sap;
Now go, the peat bogs to enjoy.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Not rhyme nor meter it's got.
It still fails the test
So do not post her lest
You improve on your rhyming a lot.
--- K-man