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It may not be, you see, accidental An impotent composer named Rohr The first time I listened to Orff (Worf - alien in Star Trek TV series)
Beethoven, Mozart and Liszt Whenever Pier Gynt and Grieg would meet Something I have suspected for long (Pippa's Song - poem by Robt Browning)
To compose a sonata, today, Prokofiev was quite aloof Betty just loves Turandot, A young Chinese girl called Mae Wong, This year is the year of Purcell, The cacophony, one of life's joys, She said, "Don't know what I'm morsickov. Sue said, "I've just had an epiphany. A composer called Leopold Boons Said Sid, a most musical Scouse, (Scouse - native of Liverpool)
Richard Strauss won't let Bach steal his thunders; (what is a gesunder?)
Apart from a couple of faults There was a curmudgeon who swore He bought her that tune, "William Tell," Willy Dufay (they say this is true) A song was composed by young Chuck, The page it is white and so clean; Composers wrote classics for queens. A lady musician named Tharp, Mr Bach was a man among men, Prolific and splendid was Bach. There was a young fellow named Bloch, An elderly scholar of Bach, For our organ concerto, my hunch Johann Sebastian Bach A young music student called White There was a small dog of Pirbright. A computer programmer from Wight, When Bach strayed too far, he repented, J. S. Bach strayed too far and he cursed There was a young man from Iraq If Johann Sebastian B, Arnold S. Played some summer stock, When Johann Sebastian Bach J S spent his time thinking lug- Carl Philip Emanuel Bach, With his rooster nearby, J. S. Bach Frau Bach, she cried, "Jesus, Johann! Sprach die jung Frau Bach to her spouse, Our music is technically slack, My child, though a talented flutist, They asked I play a Bach cantata. When Bach met the organist Flo, I married my ladyfriend Kay, At spirit seances in Queen's, The high-cultured date thought, "I lack words That ear-splitting sound from St Mark "Tocata and fugue in D minor," Johann Sebastian Bach While dozing off in my recliner, That there rhyme was write tongue-in-cheek, Johann Sebastian Bach Said Bach, "If I scrwed your vagina, There was a young man named Achillo As Bach turns in his grave, teeth a-gnashing, J S Bach, famous for the cantata, A trainer of dogs name of Knight A programming whiz-kid called Bright, On Beethoven's Ninth -The Choral. Beethoven wrote more than one work.
When music, though termed incidental,
Is performed in the West.
It is deemed to sound best
If it's recognized as occidental.
--- Loren Fitzhugh P0108
Couldn't satisfy girls any more.
He really belongs
Writing Broadway songs,
As it's the only way he can score.
--- Thomas M Patton P9712 A
I was courting young Emily Dorff.
In bush that was thick,
I pummeled my dick
Whose head is now looking like Worf's.
--- SFA
Are only infrequently hissed.
But the prommers go manic
On listening to Panic
And mutter: 'That's one to be missed.'
--- Jim Weaver Collection
The pair would not think the day complete,
Without having dinner,
With wine the beginner,
And off they would go to Pier Gynt's suite.
--- Irving Superior
Is that truth expressed in "Pippa's Song."
Events now as unfurled,
Show a view of the world
Which would indicate Pippa was wrong.
--- Loren Fitzhugh P0309
Don't proceed in the old fashioned way.
Take your seat on the keys;
Bump about as you please --
"Oh how modern!" the critics will say.
--- James Bryant Collection
With women; to tell the truth,
He got his diversions
With some most odd perversions,
Performing with Peter and the Wolf.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Puccini makes her hot to trot...
By now it's pro forma,
When he sings "Nessun dorma,"
She secretly fondles her twat.
--- Chris Kirchner
Asked herself why her life went all wrong.
Like Madame Butterfly,
Life was passing her by.
She asked Puccini to write her a song.
--- Arthur Pattaffy
Which we all have enjoyed pretty well.
As each note resounds,
His genius was crowned.
For me he can now go to Hell.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Is intended for Reich and his boys.
And whether they bow it
Or hit it, or blow it,
It makes the most horrible noise.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Stories, or that great big horsdickov
Yours. Just kill me now,
I'm so bored anyhow.
Stuck here on the rimsky, Korsakov."
--- Anon
When my date played a tape of a symphony,
The miserable creep
Knew I'd fall fast asleep,
And the SOB then stuck his dick in me!"
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0511Q
Said, "My head's always chockfull of tunes.
Some are simple and plain
As the drip of the rain.
And some enigmatic as runes."
--- Mary Danby - 2nd Armada
"I dig all that music by Strauss --
The one called Johann,
But the other one, man,
I wouldn't let into me house."
--- Ron Rubin
What his next work will be, the world wonders.
Musicians who know him
Predict a tone poem,
Scored for flush toilets, horns, and gesunders!
--- G1473
I played Strauss on my piano; a waltz
With a 1 2 3, 1
2 3 rhythm (What fun!)
2 3, 1 2 3, 1 2 (What shmaltz!)
--- Anon
That the hullabaloo and the roar
Of some rock groups, make clear
To those who can hear,
What the dead have to be grateful for.
--- A N Wilkins P8606
"You can't smooch to that," said his gal.
"Oh, just get them off,"
Said he, "Then we'll boff.
When the quick bit comes, I'll give you hell!"
--- Tiddy Ogg
Composed "Adieu m'amour" in the loo --
Subtle voice parts, all three,
While he handled his wee --
He was quick! And he cleaned up when through.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
But the lyrics ran into bad luck.
Though devoid of all flaws,
It fell short just because
Of the title: With Love You Don't Fuck!
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1989
Of masterworks I start to dream.
I start on my song
And something goes wrong;
The words that I write are obscene.
--- Anon
Their opuses called forth sweet miens.
But plebian nations
Now buy orchestrations.
This Yawny guy? Weak in the genes.
--- Anon
Got her bust tangled up in her harp.
Though protests arose,
She was forced to transpose,
Bach's G-Minor Suite to C-sharp.
--- Anon
Since his scores were sufficient for ten.
And his offspring? A score--
Which engendered the lore,
He was scoring again and again.
--- Thomas A Quinine P8301
Though he, on occasion, could shock.
For once, when he played,
'Twas risking a raid.
He did the whole fugue with his cock.
--- Larry Davis P8602
Who could play the bass viol with his cock.
With a superb erection,
He could play a selection,
From Johann Sebastian Bach.
--- Anon
Used to write on the board with his cock.
His member he'd stroke,
While he lectured Baroque,
And his dick was so old, he came chalk.
--- Anon
Is the music of Bach will have punch.
There will be co-audition
In the finest tradition,
To be followed, of course, by Bach's Lunch.
--- Albin Chaplin P8612
Was blessed with an oversized cock.
His concert complete,
He would beat on his meat
While caressing his mistress's twat.
--- Arthur California
Couldn't get his pastisches quite right.
His Gibbons was rotten,
His Byrd quite forgotten,
His Bach so much worse than his Scheidt.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who would play at the organ all night;
And in this shrewd way
It kept burglars at bay,
For its Bach was much worse that its bite.
--- R Macdonald
This is file oyl
Scored symphonies on disk at night.
Though the notes were quite pretty,
The music was shitty,
His Bach was much worse than his byte!
--- Claudius Rex
For hunger pangs gnawed and tormented.
By luck passed a maid
And her crotch she displayed,
And thus was the Bach's lunch invented.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1291
For he suffered from hunger and thirst.
But there passed a maid fair
And her pussy was bare.
What ensued was a Bach's Lunch the first.
--- Albin Chaplin
Who had holes down the side of his cock
His boyfriend Umberto
Could play a concerto
By Johannes Sebastian Bach
--- Anon
Knew his work in the minor key D,
Would involve cocks and cunts,
And non-musical grunts,
He'd say "Schtoppen zie schtuppen mit me!"
--- Anon
With a cast entirely defrocked.
A composer, the villain,
Got to do all the women.
For the first time was heard "I'll be Bach".
--- Anon
Was asked what he did after dark,
He said, "I compose a Te Deum
And perhaps a Requim,
Then I pop out and flash in the park.
--- Bill Wall
ubriously how to get tog-
ether with his Dais,
Where the sheep safely graze,
For a prelude and maybe a fugue.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Would oft take a walk in the park;
He'd pull out his flute
For a cutie to toot.
Quite a lark in the dark for a mark.
--- Anon
On his organ would play 'round the clock.
He was playing so bored
When he found the lost chord,
Which he found with the help of his cock.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1935
I gave you a whole bloody clan!
I've had quite enough...
Get that prick from my muff!
I'm twenty-six times a grand-dam!
--- Tutta Gioia
"Ich krank of your fugueing heraus!
Keep your fugueing herein,
Und maybe you'll find
Some more kleinen Bachs in der haus!"
--- Kathleen A Martin P8302 A
Inharmonious, noisy, and black.
Its ear-splitting strain
Evokes the refrain:
"Oh, Johann Sebastian, come Bach!"
--- Laurence Perrine Lib Lim
Likes music that's simply the crudest.
The Pumpkins and Manson,
(Thank goodness, not Hanson)
But when she plays Bach, she's the cutest.
--- Anon
When I told them I can't at a
Moment's notice play.
Ultimatumed they,
"A cantata or you can just ta-ta."
--- Irving Superior
He noted her organ did show.
She looked tempting to Bach
So he pulled out his cock
And he played her a fugue with his bow.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0448
But I fear we got carried away.
In the church she said, "Hark
At that music by Bach."
Then she played on my organ all day.
--- Tutta Gioia
The spirits make terrible scenes.
Thus recently Bach
Shouted angrily, "Ach
I'm sick of your damn tambourines!"
--- Morris Bishop
To help out this yuppie. This hack nerd's
Recordings of Bach
Give my stomach a shock;
He's playing the bloody Mass backwards!
--- Tucker D Ott P9001
Is Old Morgan who's practising Bach,
For the thunderous noise
Hides the squeals of the boys,
Who gyrate on his knob after dark.
--- Anon
Oh, nothing could ever be finer.
All I do is quote it,
But J S Bach wrote it,
On his napkin, at lunch, in a diner.
--- Ken Klein
Met a strippagram girl in a park;
And as he was feasting
His eyes on her G-string,
Composed a new Air for a Lark.
--- Peter Wilkins
I thought that there's no music finer
Than "rap" and "hard rock"
Or that thing by Bach:
"Tocata and fugue in D minor."
--- Observer
While in bed with young Dominique.
Please know it ain't true
Or otherwise you
All will think that I'm some kind of freak.
--- Observer
Met Anna-Marie in a park.
And as he was feasting
His eyes on her G-string,
He composed a new Aire for a lark.
--- Peter Wilkins
I'm sure I'd compose something finer."
And while they were porkin',
He played on his organ
Toccatas and Fugue in D Minor.
--- Peter Wilkins
Who preferred to be lulled on a pillow,
To the music of Bach
And composers baroque,
To be played in a manner tranquillo.
--- Albin Chaplin
His "Suite in C Minor" they're thrashing.
Then "Variations Rococo"
Are "andante giocoso",
With French ticklers, und alle Art Fasching.
--- Jester Jon
Would dash off in a trice, a sonata.
And he loved so to do
The odd, wild fugue or two,
Symphonies and a flute obbligata.
--- Loren Fitzhugh P0306
Had a dog that could sing and recite
From classical Bach
To modern day rock,
But his Bach was much worse than his bite.
--- Albin Chaplin
Once got his computer to write
His own "Ode To Joy."
It served to annoy.
His Bach was much worse than his byte.
--- Tiddy Ogg
It ends like a battle royale;
An ARMAGEDDON;
Or backgrounding on
The Gunfight at 0. K. Corral.
--- Irving Superior
He never was one who would shirk.
But as he grew deaf,
He'd fart the bass clef.
I am sure you'll forgive him this quirk.
--- Larry Davis P8602
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