MORE

His hooves on the gravel did crunch
While galloping over to munch
On Her Royal Highness,
Who thought it a minus
When stallions were tardy for lunch.
--- Randog

The equine love given to Kate,
Who's known by the moniker, "Great",
Was so oversized,
His meat, it's surmised
Split open this impaled head of state.
--- Randog

I'm suing my wife for divorce,
Since she had an affair with a horse.
I walked in one day,
There's this dappled grey --
He was chatting her up in old Norse.
--- Kevin Hale Q

A cavalryman named Ed Barger,
Once had an affair with his charger.
He fondled its dong,
Which was exceedingly long,
And steadily grew larger and larger.
--- Pat McGregor

"My stallions? Why, yes, I'd just gotten 'em."
"Well," said her doc, "you're too hot on 'em.
From the fluids inside you,
It seems that they ride you,
And together, they filled your duodenum."
--- Jim Weaver Collection

There once was a horny Italian,
Who fell madly in love with her stallion.
She sucked on its penis
With the passion of Venus,
And the horse filled her throat without dallyin'.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

On Sunday's at noon, Cousin Bea
Suspended herself from a tree.
An admirably formed
Stallion performed
The unspeakable act until three.
--- Gents Alphabet Book P9611

An equestrian nympho named Bobbie
Has a mount with an organ quite knobby.
What began as a whim -
Feeling knobs on her quim -
Has developed; that horse is her hobby!
--- Playboy Mag J F O'Conner

Lizzie, I'm told by my source,
Has had intercourse with a horse.
Her husband named Bernie
Has seen an attorney,
And was told he has grounds for divorce.
--- Ogden Nield

There once was a cowboy named Tex
Who was hungup on bestial sex.
But this deviate creep
Spurned heifers and sheep
For the love of a horse, name of Rex.
--- Robin K Willoughby P8710

A faggot who called himself Abel
Went cruising on day in a stable.
A stud of a horse
Fucked his ass with such force,
That his bowels blew out of his navel.
--- H Welchel

A woman at Churchills Downs course
Espied an excited young horse.
After closer inspection
Of the horse's erection,
She shouted, "I want a divorce!"
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0502

Good Lord! He is hung like a horse;
Exuding such masculine force!
I wish you could see
What's enthralling me --
It's some farmer's stallion, of course.
--- Anon

A fine kitty lady named Tabby,
Thinks stallion spooge isn't too shabby.
She crawls underneath,
And fondles one's sheath,
Until she is dripping; he, flabby.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

A poor fellow strained his right wrist
Because he just could not resist
Masturbating his horse,
Which bolted, of course.
He hung on, shouting "Whoa, I insist!"
--- Prof M-G

A lady who loved a thick wang,
Once rented a horse for a bang.
The bronc kicked her head,
And when she was dead,
He ripped a huge rent in her tang.
--- H Welchel

A bestial lady of Whitehorse
Spent a lifetime in search of the right horse;
"When I want to," she said,
"Take a stallion to bed,
On the whole, I'd prefer a quite light horse."
--- Keith MacMillan 112b

A horse-loving girl name of Doris
Was wooed out in Naples by Boris.
"I don't like Italians;
I much prefer stallions",
Doris said, stroking her Horace.
--- Anon

A vixen, long, lithe, blonde, and Norse,
Decided to mount a young horse.
But spurning a ride,
He showed her his pride.
Ms. Norse said, "Dear Horse, but of course!"
--- H Welchel

The beast reamed her hard with his rod,
Inciting sweet dreams of "Dear God!"
She swore then and there,
She'd always ride bare,
And see her fine stallion well-shod.
--- H Welchel

There was a young lady from Ayr
Who remarked, "There is naught to compare
With the size and the force
And the thrust of a horse,
As it buggers my sweet derriere."
--- Peter Wilkins

While Caroline sat smoking some weed,
She was overcome by the need
To bring to her bed
Someone she called Ed,
Who happened to be a large steed.
--- Captain Chaos

Mr Ed, as we Yanks know, of course,
Is a very articulate horse.
He said, "Caroline,
Let's have a sweet time --
I'll give you my dick with much force.
--- Captain Chaos

She replied, "Let's give it a whirl!"
His sweet pounding made her hair curl.
So now you have heard
From this little bird,
Of a horse that went riding a girl.
--- Captain Chaos

The starlet was caught giving head
To the TV star back of the shed.
Her fate was determined,
When the star she was spermin',
Turned out to be Mr. Ed.
--- Jim Weaver Collection A

There was a young farm girl, most coarse,
Who liked being fucked by her horse.
One day when he filled her,
His mammoth schlong killed her,
"No KY," he cried with remorse.

(KY jelly - lubricant)
--- Pete Fintschenko

"I want" said the widow Gert Orso,
"To purchase your finest stud horse, so
I'll have me a male
Who can, without fail,
Fill me up when he plugs up my torso.
--- Travis Brasell

The wife of old Samuel Morse,
She too, bought herself a stud horse.
Quite dashing and dotty,
Got keyed up real potty,
She didit, she didit, of course.
--- Tiddy Ogg

"I see that you've spilled your 'white sauce'
All over your mothers twat moss.
I've taught you quite well!"
"You've taught me? Like Hell!
I learnt watchin' mom fuck our hoss!
--- Travis Brasell

"It's clear you've been whoring, sweet dame."
That's nonsense, my husband-so-lame!"
"Then what is this squirt
Of spunk on your skirt?"
"Why, only old Dobbin's poor aim."
--- Anon

The mounted policeman named Morse,
Every evening had sex with his horse.
Said commissioner Maillon,
"Your horse is a stallion.
You're the queerest old cop on the force."
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0205

In the sixties, in a Playboy mag,
Was cartoon of a sagging, nude hag,
REPINING lost youth;
Still seeking, forsooth,
A reprise with a stallion or nag.
--- Elois

One day in the stable with Claire,
(My stallion was serving her mare)
She suddenly blushed
And breathlessly gushed:
"I'm nipping outside for some air!"
--- SFA

This is file ntk

And so it was, on her return,
That passions had started to burn.
She fell to her knees
Beseeching me: "Please!
Go tell your damned horse, it's my turn!"
--- SFA

And when it was time for her service,
She wasn't a tiny bit nervous.
After taking a pounding,
She said, nicely sounding,
"Next week, this fine stud, please reserve us!"
--- Ward Hardman

A horse of a different colour
Would no longer trick 'er and lull 'er
To stuporous fancies.
He just raids her pants. E-
Ven still, this gal couldn't be duller.

I once met the young Lady Leed
Who rode a magnificent steed.
"He gallops and trots,
And it gives me the hots.
In the morning I still taste his seed."
--- Anon

An old racehorse they gave at the track
Some Viagra and then a sharp whack.
He became most intense
As he jumped o'er the fence
Then he ran off and never came back.
--- Tom Patton P0510Q

There isn't a choosier lay
Than Lucy at U.C.L.A.
Just once when a horse
Subdued her by force,
Was she willing to go all the way.
--- Hugh Oliver A130B

You see that lady named Angel?
She frequently, out on the range'll
Make love to her horse,
A stallion of course;
If hoof-rot don't get her, the mange'll.
--- Marlene Lewis

Says my little one, "Please make a ditty
About Lucy, my cute little kitty!"
Well, the problem is that
I think "Pussy" not "Cat",
And find "kitty" less witty than "titty".
--- John Miller 0264

There's lots of thing rhyming with "kitty",
And a limerick need not be too pretty.
So I couldn't think why
I'd not give it a try;
I hope these are sufficiently witty.
--- John Miller 0264a

While visiting Sal in the city,
She said, "Come up, look at my kitty!"
You can guess my surprise
When the damned thing had eyes,
Drank milk, had sharp teeth, and smelled shitty!
--- John Miller 0264b a

At the jail, the boys formed a committee,
With fifty-five bucks in the kitty,
To sneak in a whore
For an hour or more:
At that price would you bet she is pretty?
--- John Miller 0264c

Said the girl, "Just look at my kitty!
She's so soft, and so gentle and pretty
And her tongue is so rough
Just a little's enough,
When I get her to lick on my clitty."
--- John Miller 0264d

Let's all take a moment to pity
Poor Clarence, whose face was so zitty.
When he walked through the doors
Of a house full of whores,
He heard: "Quick, Someone grease up the kitty!"
--- John Miller 0264e a

Could it be that guy, Walter Mitty,
Once dreamed of a woman named Kitty,
With boobs out to here
And voluptuous rear --
Got in real life not even a titty?
--- John Miller 0264f

In search of exotic diversion,
Tom had an affair with a Persian.
But beneath all that fur
She wasn't a her.
Now Tom's accused of perversion.
--- Richard L Harrison P9012

There was a strange man from Zabat,
Who preferred to have sex with his cat.
"About pussy, I'm fussy--
I don't want no hussy..."
And we all say 'me-ow' to that!
--- Writerman

I've been keeping this under my hat,
But a man's best friend is his cat.
They're much fun to screw
Or pop into a stew;
And all it will cost is a pat.
--- David Miller

I once knew a fellow called Scotty,
Whose habits were awfully grotty.
In five minutes flat,
He had buggered my cat,
And tossed himself off on my potty.
--- Michael Horgan

The Mahatma on Mt. Himavat,
Opined as he diddled a cat:
"She's a far better piece
Than the Viceroy's niece,
And also has more fur on her prat.
--- L0607

A cat must be fast on his feet
When looking for females to greet.
When the barbs on his cock
Make her lash out in shock,
The male beats a hasty retreat.
--- Actaeon

When Father John wanted a screw,
He'd stuff a fat cat in a shoe,
Pull up his cassock,
And kneel on a hassock,
While doing his damnedest to mew.
--- L0645

When fucking a cat that is dead
Avoid the vagina and head.
Their hot little anus
Is rightly quite famous,
Or you could make your own hole instead.
--- Paul Boston

No nooky can make me right crabby,
So I toddled off to the Abbey;
But 'twasn't for fun
With some sex starved nun,
But to rape their once friendly tabby.
--- David Miller

The tabby let out such a screech
That I climbed up the wall, out of reach.
But she also climbed walls
And clawed off my balls...
Taught a lesson the Nuns couldn't teach.
--- John Miller

I have on my knee a knee-sitter;
I'm wondering if my knob would fit her.
I am baby-sittin'
My sisters' new kitten.
My goodness, I have gone and split her!
--- Frank Fazed

And now her pussy's all agape;
If found out, I'll be charged with rape.
Perhaps I can mend
This terrible rend;
Can someone lend me some duct tape?
--- Frank Fazed

Some duct tape I have, but you're sick;
Is there anything that you wouldn't stick?
Some day you'll get stuck
While your trying to fuck
Something too small for your dick.
--- Karen

I've got a big cat called Ginge;
On his love life I never impinge.
So most everyday
He'll find him a stray,
And together they have a sex binge.
--- Anon

In the streets down below we hear cries
From our cats, in heat mobilized.
There's a riot in town;
Boys we have to clamp down;
Lots of water will do -- cold as ice!
--- Anon

A zookeeper fingered a horny cat;
When sure of himself, he did fornicate.
But the female lashed out
And the keeper did shout,
For he wound up in need of a tourniquet.
--- Actaeon

My Siamese is called Juicy Jill;
Luring every tom to my window sill
She's in estrus for weeks;
Shows lordosis and shrieks!
I wish she were irreproducible.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Though praises of cats have been sung,
They're no good if you are well hung;
It won't fit your prick,
But pleasant's the lick
You may get from it's rough little tongue.
--- Anon

There was a young lad of the Nile,
Who had habits exceedingly vile,
That involved tiny cats,
Hardly bigger than rats,
Which he'd stuff up his arse with a smile.
--- Peter Wilkins

Reviewing his sex memory banks,
He still winced at a kinky "no thanks".
What he'd heard was absurd;
Partly hissed, partly purred,
"I tease then I quit, I'm a Manx."

(no tail)
--- Esther Koch P0102


MORE