Jim's too butchered by now to correct 'em.
(Is that hole a vagina or rectum?)
He played one of the bitches,
'Fore they took out the stitches,
And diplays an odd sexual spectrum.
--- Ward Hardman

There was a young lady from Tuphet,
Whose box was so huge none could stuff it.
They transplanted the twidget,
Of a rather small midget.
Now she's known as Little Miss Muffet.
--- Anon

A sex-mad young satyr named Toby,
Set up shop in the town of Nairobi,
Where, to worn out old tarts,
He sold brand-new parts,
Which he cleverly made of adobe.
--- G0683

A great surgical genius named Taylor
Grafted tits on the back of a sailor.
If his ass had held out,
There is hardly a doubt
That the cash would have filled up a whaler.
--- G1063

There was a trans-sexual chappy,
Who thought, as a girl he'd be happy.
While under the knife,
He said, "It's my life,
And Doc, would you please make it snappy!"
--- David Miller

The new Miss America's a fraud;
From Florida not Kansas, by God!
She raged and she ranted
Till her breasts were implanted;
Could it be that her true name is Claude?
--- Tom Patton P9701

If asked, are there man-things you miss?
One's standing upright for a piss,
And shagging the asses
Of poor country lasses,
And watching them slurp down my jis..!
--- Anon

There once was a man who's named Grady;
Sexually a little bit shady.
Fucked up in the head;
With surgery instead,
He's now not a man but a lady.
--- Troy Walla

When Christine was George one fine autumn,
A great many ladies had sought 'im.
Where he was once on top,
She has turned a full flop,
And she now spends her time on the bottom.

(Christine Jorgensen had sex change operation early '50's)
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1932

Our poor Jimmy has been in a snit,
Since he traded his dong for a slit.
Says mad Jim, "I'd a whim
To acquire me a quim.
Now I've only one ball and one tit."
--- Anon

He's tried raising some cash as a whore,
But he's currently lacking allure.
He's considered tenth-rate,
In both gay bar and straight,
Though he's somewhat improved from before.
--- Anon

The transplant most wanted by SHE -
A penis placed vaginally.
No more need for men.
But one problem then -
With which of them then will she pee?
--- Irving Superior P9503

There was a young fellow named Walter
Who his sex he wanted to alter.
Upon the completion
Of the penile deletion,
He could feel his manliness falter.
--- Popsicle TP9806

Inclined as you are to penisectomy,
Here's some advice that was fed to me:
It's not a cunt hawk --
It's a clit on a stalk,
Said the transvestite as s/he gave head to me.
--- H Welchel

"Doc, will I need some morphine?"
Asked transexual Joe, soon Jolene.
Said Doc, "We'll have quarts!
The most painful part's
When we sew in that salty sardine!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection A

A fanciful fellow named Milt
Was completely redone and rebuilt.
Said his girl, "Let's partake
Just for good old times' sake."
But he said, "Not how I'm now built."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-2193

There once was a young man named Chris,
Whom everyone thought was a priss.
In sheer desperation --
Sex change operation,
And he went from a mister to miss.
--- Chris Dunbar

Why women live seven years more?
Reward for the children they bore.
Be that as it may,
At eighty today,
I'm having a sex change before....
--- Irving Superior

His folks wired back: "Dearest Daughter,
We're shocked to be told of that slaughter.
You've cut off your pole
In exchcange for a hole?
Now you'll have to sit down to pass water!"
--- Bluebird TP9806

There was a young person named Clarence,
Who cabled from Sweden: "Dear Parents:
Sex-change operation
Creates new relation.
As Clara, implore your forebearance."
--- John Ciardi

On the gender they really do want,
There are those who are quite nonchalant.
They seek amputations
That transform their relations
Now my father's my cousin's new aunt.
--- The Sailor P0306

I'd like to possess just a slit,
And perhaps with pills, some nice tits.
Said the surgeon, "For cash,
I do not think it rash
To provide you with two one-inch clits."
--- F Ormatsee

A sex change removed both his stones.
It was on advice of sawbones.
And now they must build
His breasts and he's thrilled.
I hear what they use is whore moans!
--- Al Willis

We all know the word "Apendectomy",
As well as the term "Tonsilectomy".
But we find it quite strange
That in a sex change,
Why it's not called, "Adadicktomy".
--- Lims For Year - 01

Said a colorless dyke, "There no kick to me.
As a male I'd look less like a hick to me."
So she made a date
With a surgeon first rate
To perform on her an addictomy.
--- Jane D Hughes P9104

Diabolical surgeon, Doc Bunce,
Transplanted ten peckers from runts
To his hands, feet and nose,
Then he stripped the Pope's clothes
And broke Ten Commandments at once.
--- Al Chaplin P8908

Whilst staying just south of Milan,
I began to dance a 'can-can'.
Except that I can't
'Cause my recent implant
Is still sore. (But at last I'm a man!)
--- Anon

There was a young fellow from Beverly
Who went in for fucking quite heavily.
He fucked night and day
Till his ballocks gave way,
But the doctors replaced them quite cleverly.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

A surgeon named Timothy Morgan,
Was a whiz at transplanting an organ.
For twenty-five grand,
He'd install one goat gland,
One prick, and two balls -- Quite a bargain!
--- Anon

To the doc went a fellow named Schule
For correcting the kink in his tool.
Said the doctor, sedate,
"I will make your prick straight --
I'll exchange it for mine, you damn fool."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0601

There was a sad hunter named Ware,
Whose manhood was snapped off by a bear.
Sobbed he, "That damned bruin,
Caused my sexual ruin.
Do you think I could glue on a pair?"
--- Grand Prix Lim 561 G2063

Have you heard of the big Texas Ranger
Who boasted that no one would change her?
"Let some surgical nit
Make a cock of my clit?
Fuck Off! or I'll shoot at you, Stranger!"
--- Anon

Here's Constable Julia Bird
Looking utterly daft and absurd,
In a tunic so brief
That it beggars belief.
Operation's on April the third.
--- Anon

This is file nhl

To the doc went a fellow named Jock
For his neck was as stiff as a rock.
The able physician
Called in a magician,
And he transferred the cramp to his cock.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0492

A wretched young man from La Porte,
Was hung much too thin and too short,
So he increased his shaft
With a elephant graft,
And now it won't fit where it ort.
--- Hugh Oliver A046C

You may think my story is bunk,
But I knew a horny young punk,
Because of lost face,
He had his replaced
With a full grown elephant's trunk.
--- Possum TP9802

The guy with the elephant's putz,
Just look at how far out it juts.
But it wasn't all good;
Occasionally it would
Try hard to feed him his nuts.
--- Possum TP9802

I came home last night just to check her;
When I saw it I wanted to deck her.
Everything was fine
Till she gave me this line,
"Look down, you now have Frank's pecker!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection

She went on to say, "Ain't that rich?
I'd not wait for Halloween to switch.
When a tinkle you're taking,
It's Frank's shank you're shaking --
Take that, you big son of a bitch!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection

A soldier who came from East Rockaway
Had a mine blow his balls and his cock away.
Kangaroo genitalia
Grafted on in Australia
Fixed him so he jumps broads a block away.
--- Bob Giandomenico P8901a

A bisexual person of Trail
Would prefer to be robustly male,
And enjoy the sensation
The right operation
Could probably fully en-tail.
--- Keith MacMillan 98d

A penurious Frenchman named Breep
Had crocodile glands put in cheap.
Now his smile is quite bright,
For he spends every night
Making love while he swims in the deep.
--- Arthur Deex P0309

A penurious Frenchman named Bratis
Had nightingale glands put in gratis.
Now his smile is quite bright,
For he spends every night
Making love while he's perched in a lattice.
--- Arthur Deex P0309

A penurious Frenchman named Bost
Got polar bear glands at no cost.
Now his smile is quite bright,
For he spends every night
Making love while he's covered with frost.
--- Arthur Deex P0309

An old man who lived by the Nile
Had dysfunction that was erectile.
They grafted a boner
From an equine donor,
Now all the girls give him a smile.
--- Laurence U

There was an old man of Cajon,
Who never could get a good bone.
With the aid of a gland,
It grew simply grand,
Now his wife cannot leave it alone.
--- L0277

When Smith caught his cock in some gears,
They grafted on skin from his ears.
And now the poor guy
Can hear through his fly,
And fucking just bores him to tears.
--- G2016

On a heart transplant, patient Tom Mather,
Worked himself into a lather.
Said he, "The idea's good,
But, God! If I could,
Have a new prostate gland, I'd much rather."
--- Anon

There was a young butcher named Spicer,
Whose pecker got caught in the slicer.
As it dropped from the root,
He could only salute,
And the whole thing could not be conciser.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1816

He met an old sailor named Pete
Who knew how to splice a rope neat.
So he cut off the cock
Of a horse of fine stock,
And he asked him to splice on three feet.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1817

When Spicer attempted to lay,
He held it erect and did say,
"Are you ready to test?"
But was sadly depressed
For his pecker dropped down and said, "Neigh."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1818

In a gene exchange mixup, young Neal
When he woke, felt his crotch to reveal
The prick of a horse,
And it caused him remorse
For the horse got the best of the deal.
--- Al Chaplin P9403

For a sex change operation I wait
To provide better fucks for my mate.
But when they cut and sew,
Where do the pricks go...?
There's a hotdog van parked by the gate.
--- F Ormatsee

A young sapphic nun from St. Wister,
With a wish to be switched to a mister,
Underwent a sex change
With results that were strange,
For it turned her into a tran-sister.
--- Bob Giandomenico P9507

A shy plastic surgeon named Jack
Transplanted himself a Big Mac.
The girls were amazed
At its size when it raised,
Which was great (though it was colored black).

(hear about the plastic surgeon who hung himself - McW)
--- Martin Wellborn P9502

There was a young lady called Fran
Who started her life as a man.
She first got some tits,
Then lost her bits.
Now she does what she wants 'cause she can!
--- Countrygirl

Whenever he plays with his sword,
He conjures up pictures of Maud.
If only he knew
As he splatters his goo,
That she's now a most definite Claude.
--- Anon

An epicure dining at Crewe
Grabbed that elephant whang and just flew
To a surgeon (viz plastic)
And requested a drastic
Transplant of a mere foot or two.
--- Martin Wellborn P8507

His monkey-glands made poet Yeats,
Most anxious with girls to have dates.
His poetic measures,
Gave very few pleasures,
If one can accept estimates.
--- Anon

The glands of a monkey may be
Restorers of virility,
But the operation
Can cause consternation,
If the patient swings up in tree.
--- Warrick Elrod

A penurious Frenchman named Brie,
Had monkey glands put in for free.
Now his smile is quite bright,
For he spends every night
Making love while he swings from a tree.
--- Limericks For John P9802

My sweetie vacationed overseas;
During her absence I was not pleased.
With passion I burned
And now she's returned;
At last I can put my mind at ease.
--- Anon

At her house I did intrude,
On my girlfriend in the nude.
It suddenly seemed
Like a horrible dream;
In my absence, she'd become a dude.
--- Anon

In the place where my head used to rest
On her soft and ample breast,
I could only stare;
It was covered with hair,
On top of a brawny muscular chest.
--- Anon

Below her hairy love triangle,
A new appendage now did dangle.
It was easy to see
She was bigger than me!
From every view or any angle.
--- Anon

I didn't quite know what to say
I felt like I should run away
We had to part
It broke my heart
But if I kissed her now then I'd be gay
--- Anon

You shouldn't laugh or be rude,
And to tell jokes so mean and crude.
You know its true;
It could happen to you;
Your baby could become a dude.
--- Anon