A spermatozoa called Dave One fallopian tube to another "Your ova are ova the hill A conceptual masterpiece, this, A spermatozoa called Claude A spermatozoa named Proff, A spermatozoa named Horace We're here in this strange terra nova, A spermatozoa called Odin, A spermatozoa called Ivan A spermatozoa called Lee, A spermatozoa called Lew Two sperm were discussing the issue A spermatozoa called Ted A spermatozoa called Ed Sperm 1: "I feel quite out of place." A spermatozoa named Jack Sounds more like poor Jack was just lost, Now Jack's on a trip down the loo. A close friend of Jack's was name Frank. The fate of the sperm is unclear. A spermatozoa called Sean, A spermatozoa called Mac, A sperm platoon well trained and steady. A spermatozoa called Ron A spermatozoa named Bruce, Two sperm swimming after the blast, A spermatozoa named Mort A spermatozoa called Boyce A brother to Boyce was named Bruce, Joyce thought herself to be great, A spermotozoa called Ed There once was a sperm cell named Lou,
This is file mdm
A spermatozoa called Jules, Some spermatozoa, they're French, My memory takes me 'way back I stopped not for breakfast nor dinner; One night when my mother got hot, At the time I was naught but a blister. "I know we're inside her twat," A spermatozoa called Thor Two ova called Mary and Joy A spermatozoa called Boyd For poor little Boyd with some feeling Worse places there are to be flung, A man from Manputo and so on, Poor Leo, poor Jimmy, poor Lenny, I was contented and snug in your ball There once was a sperm name of Leo, Two sperms recalled tales of their past; But now what's that sticky brown goo, And something more's happening, I note, A spermatozoa called Jill A flow of sperm's racing along A spermatozoa called Paul, A spermatozoa, (no name) What I am called, rhymes with germ; Said an ovum one night to a sperm, There was a young poet named Corso, The boy who forgot to grow down There was a young man of Bengal There once was a young guy named Fred, A salesman without any cares, So short was the girl of young Visser, There is no particular knack If over your peer group you loom; (yeah but you get a lot more - McW)
A tall man who found his great height
Found himself in a long narrow cave,
And fearing his doom,
Climbed into a womb,
Met an egg, and they started to rave.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Said, "My turn this month to be a mother."
"Your ova-provide-
d," the other one cried;
"But your under-supplied," said the other...
--- Peter Wilkins
And not ovaly keen on the thrill;
But I'll make an eggception;
You try for conception."
"Okay," said the other, "I will!"
--- Peter Wilkins
Which no one could possibly hiss.
But can one afford
To roundly applaud,
An occasion at best hit-or-miss.
--- Prof
Was feeling lethargic and bored,
So he went for a swim
Right into a quim,
And in no time at all -- Claude scored!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Was jerking his little tail off.
Just by pure luck,
He got his head stuck,
In something quite thicky and soff..
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Belonged to a fellow called Boris.
And as Boris humped
Horace was pumped,
Into someone who gave Boris solace.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
And found nothing interesting, so fa'.
But we got to rush
Or else she will flush
Us out 'fore we get to the ova.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Had a quite dreadful foreboding;
The hole he was sent in,
Belonged to a gent in
Possession of faulty sex coding.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Had a man who tried life to enliven.
He found a young gel
Who handled him well;
Ivan fell in her palm on a divan.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Had feelings of gladness and glee.
But his mirth turned to doubt
When he was, he found out,
In the orifice used for a pee.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Was waiting, with nothing to do.
When his man felt an urge,
And Lew, with a surge,
Was projected straight into a loo.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Of Buddha, Nirvana, and Vishnu.
Where they were was all white,
So they thought it all right,
Little knowing it was only a tissue.
--- Wobbly
Came out on the night they were wed,
But was sadly, withdrawn,
And discovered next morn,
Remaining, a stain on the bed.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Had a double length tail but no head.
He came back to front
In a nice lady's cunt,
And a knot in his tail, it is said.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Sperm 2: "Me too, but 'twas nice change of pace."
Sperm 1: "Bet we look funny
All gooey and runny."
Sperm 2: "Oh no, we look good on her face!"
--- Travis Brasell
Said, "I think that we're on the right track;
Past the entrance we've sped,
In the dark and ahead
Are the tonsils we aim to attack.
--- Marlene Lewis
Which he would soon find -- to his cost.
He did not taste good,
So, just like I would --
The poor girl, her cookies, she tossed.
--- Peter Wilkins
If he aims to make something new,
It will not be pretty --
It's going to be shitty --
'Cause all he can get to is poo.
--- Peter Wilkins
In the next load ex the sperm bank,
While looking forward to cunt,
Heard a yell from up front,
"Go back lads, it's only a wank!"
--- Marlene Lewis
And all will admit the same fear,
In finding the spot,
In which it is shot,
Is the ass of a big hairy queer.
--- Goin2later
Aroused when his man got the horn,
And from this erection
Shot out with perfection.
Nine months later a baby was born.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Found himself in a wee lassie's crack.
He cried out aloud
To the rest of the crowd,
"Ah came, and ah'm nae goin' back."
--- Jim Weaver Collection
One weakling, though, said: "I'm not ready.
Can't go with the flow,
Much too weak now, you know.
When I gain strength I'll catch up", so said he.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Was called on, and now he has gone.
Because in the night
To someone's delight,
Ron shot out from inside a hard-on.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
When styling his tail with some mousse,
Said to his master,
"It'll be a disaster!
I'll end up as someone's papoose!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Said one, "I don't think I can last.
I don't mean to beg,
But I can't reach the egg.
It's only the tonsils I've past."
--- Tim Fisher
His mission just wouldn't abort.
He managed to slip
Past that resevoir tip...
Now he's living on dad's child support!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Held on grimly but hadn't a choice,
When a sudden explosion
Sent Boyce and an ocean
Of friends past the tonsils of Joyce.
--- Peter Wilkins
Who, too, tried to hold but no use;
The blast had such force,
It knocked him off course,
And sailed him through Knockatooth Loose.
--- Peter Wilkins
At the speed with which she'd fellate.
A soft inner cheek,
Tongue silky and sleek,
Caused many to shoot and gyrate.
--- Nini Poo
Quite philosophically said,
"If she's on the Pill
Why is it a thrill,
To get me excited in bed".
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who dreamed that an egg tryst was due.
But his dream proved a dud,
For his swinging host's pud
Trysted off in the mouth of one Sue!
--- Playboy Mag Jim Weaver
Swimming happily in a gene pool,
One day was projected,
Much as expected,
From the tool of a fool up in school.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Were hot to get into some wench.
When they heard her "Oui Oui's"
They thought, "Where she pees?
Or shall we that Gallic thirst quench?"
--- Tutta Gioia
To life as a sperm in the sack.
With millions of guys
With teensy-small Y's
And gals with an X for a crack.
--- John Miller
Like the tortoise, I came out the winner.
It really felt swell
As I latched to her shell
And happily drilled my stuff in her.
--- John Miller
My dad did his thing -- I was shot
In a thin rubber sack,
But did that hold me back?
As you clearly can see, it did not.
--- John Miller
I noted another -- my sister --
Who shared the same sac;
But she turned her back
When I made my advance, and I missed her.
--- John Miller
Said sperm number one, "It's so hot
And moist, juices thick..."
Sperm two: "Yeah, I'm sick
And tired; and I'm feeling quite shot!"
--- Travis Brasell
Was received with a scream and a roar,
When he was ejected
Somewhat unexpected,
In a throat that was painful and sore.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Were so innocent, blushing and coy,
That they asked Ermintrude,
If she saw Dick intrude,
To shout, "Spermatoazoa ahoy!"
--- Anon
Was exceedingly upset and annoyed
To discover he'd not
Been shot straight up a twat,
But instead into space and a void.
--- Peter Wilkins
Had hoped for a fate more appealing,
And felt he'd much rather
Have been somebody's father
Than glued to the ceiling, congealing.
--- Peter Wilkins
Like straight up the chute of a bung.
Once mired there in muck,
Then Boyd would be stuck
And destined to squirt out with dung.
--- Goin2later
Once kept a pet spermatozoon;
It used to swim races
In feminine places --
I haven't much data to go on.
--- J H Lee
Were ingested, just some among many
In digestive juices
To die. Such abuse is
So common it's not worth a penny.
--- John Miller
'Till your silly sex nature did call.
In a violent broth
You me did send forth;
Later to appear with a bawl.
Who longed from the balls to get free-o,
Yet in panic swam back,
For it wasn't a crack,
That led to the tummy of Cleo.
--- John Miller
Said one, "Life's a bitch -- goes too fast!"
"You're right," said the other,
"But aren't we glad, brother,
That we started out with a blast?"
--- Travis Brasell
That's washing out both me and you.
I thought it a joke
That they use diet coke,
To clear us out; gee but it's true.
--- Tiddy Ogg
The mouth of that randy old goat
That dumped us in here,
Is sucking us clear
And we're now in the bugger's own throat.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Was taking it really quite ill..
All those macho tadpoles,
Said she'd too many holes,
To swim with the requisite skill.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Toward the head of a pumping hard dong.
Says a tiny weak critter,
"Better stop till I'm fitter;
To compete now is utterly wrong."
--- Anon
Was reluctant to exit the ball.
He knew he was right
And in a great plight,
When a turd came and hit him -- that's all.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Was swimming about in a dame.
Said he: "Tubes fallopian
Are quite near utopian!
A vast difference from whence I came."
--- Anon
When pleasure, becomes a concern.
I swim in races
In feminine places,
My applicator resembles a worm.
--- Anon
"You're a very attractive young germ.
Come join me, my sweet,
Let our nuclei meet,
And in nine months, we'll both come to term."
--- Isaac Asimov
Exceedingly short in the torso;
An undersized dwarf,
Scaled down endomorph,
A pigmy manque, only more so.
--- Armand E Singer 240B
Grew up on the far side of town;
By the time he was seven,
He was six-foot-eleven,
A figure of highest renown.
--- Tom Baker P8806
Who grew most excessively tall.
He'd peer from his height
And his wife, poor wee mite,
He hardly could see her at all.
--- Mary Danby - 2nd Armada
Whose feet were quite far from his head.
His girlfriend was small,
'Bout four feet in all;
But height doesn't matter in bed.
--- Jim Weaver Collection a
Caught a housewife quite unawares.
She was eight inches taller
Than her gentleman caller,
So their passion took place on the stairs.
--- John Fernbank
He knelt on his knees just to kiss her.
When she stood on her toes,
The end of her nose
Would come to the knob on his pisser.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-2376
To give people the height that they lack.
For there's only one way,
You should try it today;
It's called stretching yourself on the rack.
--- Anon
If you're tallest, by far, in the room,
Here is research to fear:
Each inch costs you a year,
And you'll have to pay more for your tomb.
--- Anon
Was the level of birds in their flight.
When they did ask why
He'd his head in the sky,
He described the cause of his plight.
--- Edwin J Weinstein