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So sad he was all the night through, Socrates' shrew-wife XANTHIPPE, A man would be happy if he, Hospitality XENIAL The Greeks were exceeding good hosts, New England heritage YANKEE, YANKEE Doodle pejorative Yankee, a word in my noodle, Who's watching for our country's good? The safe-cracking robber's a YEGG. An impatient YEGG I once knew, Jill was thrown out of her birthplace; The YEGG's name was Halibut Hal, There once were some clumsy young YEGGS, Safecrackers or robbers may be YEGGS. YELLOW JOURNALISM, a mess, It's not opium, smoked in a den, It's safe to admit that most men, For sex I will always have YEN; Said Hilde, the new lesbian, The poor deprived guy with the YEN, Such strong longings for sex as YEN. As a youth, I had quite a YEN, A fellow may date now and then, Testosterone which flows in men, Or "head ache" will oft intervene, I've always had this YEN But when "outside" on a spree, If I'd like to dish the latest dirt, How did rumors make ears ring Yesterday's eventide was YESTREEN, I think that, between you and me, A rowdy hooligan is a YOB; For back-slang, defined in the SOD, (Shorter Oxford Dict.) Encounter a YOB?, I would flee one, According to creed of YOUNG TURKS, The YOUTHQUAKE at my house is fine; Come on, guys, give me a break, With studs piercing all body parts, Now every swabbie sure knows, Some folks like to fool with YOYO's, The YUPPIFIED sections of Boston The old gent announced with a sigh, Where I live, it's the YUPPIES that rule. Young urban wealthy do YUPPIFY ZABERNISM is deed of the damned, The bullying of ZABERNISM, A ZAFTIG big Inuit maid Monica, a ZAFTIG maidel, The ZAFTIG maids get noticed fast; "She'll be ZAFTIG," her genetics said, ZAFTIG Monica lured Willy with "head", Her accusations unfounded, ZAFTIG? Don't be down in the dump! In an era when brides were still chaste Now paste gems would make ladies burn, ZAIBATSU, which has certain flaws, Commedia deli'arte foil ZANY The comics we think of as ZANY Now ZANY meant "over-the-top", (French zani, from Italian zanni, nickname for Giovanni)
My rude, inconsiderate neighbor A leaf blower that belongs to my neighbor A marker of time, ZEITGEBER, When the sun moves over to the west, The sun, if I may now surmise, A ZEITGEBER works in my pup, Our dog is the best of ZEITGEBERS,
By dawn the boy knew what to do:
His horn he employs.
Folks cried, "What's that noise?"
He heaved a cyan said, "I'm blew!"
--- Gary Hallock
Began tirades in tones snippy,
Though soon in sound bold,
Her scold would take hold,
And Soc chose hemlock drink zippy.
--- Daniel Ford
Were not married to Xanthippe,
Who had a sharp tongue,
Now listed among,
Viragos, most definitely.
--- Chris Papa
Begs preparations menial,
To make guests happy
With hot canapes,
And cool libations genial.
--- Daniel Ford
Except for their retsina toasts;
Duties XENIAL,
Quite congenial,
Observed on Aegean coasts.
--- Chris Papa
Whom sloth will surely make cranky,
Is hard-working kind,
Prefers daily grind:
No nonsense, no hanky panky.
--- Daniel Ford
Is now more commemorative;
Again we've usurped
What British had "perp'ed," (perpetrated)
Into paean majorative.
--- Daniel Ford
Part of a song very crudal,
Where pasta is sung,
Or otherwise hung,
On somebody's hat, guy named "Doodle".
--- Chris Papa
It's something each President should.
But one quite adept,
Slick Willy, yclept,
Was more into bobbing his hood.
--- Chris Papa
With speculation, difference I beg:
Without precision,
Wording elision
Yields safecrackers who break the egg.
--- Daniel Ford
Once got in a helluva stew.
He tried to be quick
With a dynamite stick;
And now he is called Gimpy Lou.
--- Chris Papa
Poor thing lives in total disgrace,
Ever since the day
(It's a shame, I say,)
She was caught with YEGG on her face.
--- Gunjan
Who had ways of pleasing each gal.
The prissy or louche,
With or without douche,
He loved scents both perfumed and mal.
--- Chris Papa
Who fumbled with their powder kegs.
The safe blew sky high,
With them standing by;
They've drained "bitter cup" to its dregs.
--- Chris Papa
Oft drawn from society's dregs,
Though Damon Runyon,
The Peeler of Onion,
Often described them as good eggs.
--- Daniel Ford
Pariah of the other proud press.
Which though it's unchaste,
Meets popular taste.
Sells many more papers, not less.
--- Dr Limerick
Nor cannabis: No it is men.
Young or old, straight or gay,
I must have one today,
For I'm gripped in the vice of a YEN.
--- Eva Amata
For ladies, have definite YEN.
Frustrated by breaks,
For pads and headaches,
Which seem to intrude now and then.
--- Chris Papa
I want it again and again.
I'm lucky, you see,
Wife gives it to me.
Don't have to visit sleazy den.
--- Barrie Eksteen
"For the ladies, I too, have a YEN.
Yes, it's Merkins for me
Because men, you see,
Have always been beyond my ken!
--- Sheryl A Lemma
Is one of the bipeds called men,
Who may go to bed
With dumb quadruped,
When YEN tops the scale, one to ten.
--- Elois
Does cut both ways, a partners cry "When!"
The subsequent stress
Does create a mess,
Of internal strife, hives and a wen.
--- Daniel Ford
To meet a gal who's a "ten".
Now I would settle
For much less mettle;
Like a "six" who prefers older men.
--- Norm Brust
A lady for whom he's no YEN;
But if he has bucks,
He may get some yucks,
Though likely she isn't a "10".
--- Gary Hallock
For sex creates powerful YEN.
But once they are wed,
Cool in wife's bed,
With estrogen's words, "Not again!"
--- Chris Papa
Which sours the domestic scene.
As mailman intrudes,
While poor hubby broods
Or moves on to new pastures green.
--- Chris Papa
To see what would happen when
I ever got "thin",
The clothes I was in
Made me look exactly like Jen. (nifer Lopez)
--- Barb
There's one shop where they know me.
When I buy their threads,
Without rueful dreads,
I can rightfully get to say "whee!"
--- Barb
With all the bad news I could blurt,
I might go rent a
Genuine YENTA
Who'd then all the neighbors alert.
--- Chris Papa
Before telephones were the thing?
One simply sent a
Message to a YENTA
And everyone got the word, bada-bing!
--- Norm Brust
During which some couples made routine
The pursuit leisure
Of mutual pleasure,
With some feeling betwixt and between.
--- Daniel Ford
Some YLEM we never will see.
With "Big Bang" it went,
All totally spent,
All gone into eternity.
--- Chris Papa
For Jorge Jorgeson, it's a job.
This backward spelling,
For such raise helling,
With my syntax surely does play hob.
--- Daniel Ford
This is file kxl
A sample, we see, so we nod:
A 'yob' is perverse,
(It's 'boy' in reverse),
Demonstrably, damnably odd.
--- Nick
And prefer not even to see one.
"Bad-assed", second rate,
Contorted with hate,
'Tis pity that some try to be one!
--- Daniel Ford
Established guys are hoary jerks.
They'd like to get out,
So they, too, can flout
The power, positions, and perks.
--- Chris Papa
I'm proud of this teen male of mine!
His grades are real good;
He does what he should.
He never walks over the line.
--- Maggie
The fad that you'd call a "YOUTHQUAKE",
Is loud music, manic,
In a tongue profanic,
Designed to produce huge headache.
--- Chris Papa
Adorned by the bad tattoo arts,
In ill-fitting clothes,
A bone through the nose,
And icicles there in their hearts.
--- Chris Papa
It's safer to play with YOYO's;
A much better match,
Who knows what you'll catch,
From messing in bars, with GoGo's.
--- Chris Papa
But for me, I abstain with no no's.
I more like a bed
With a sexy redhead,
Taking vitamin E with my NoDoze.
--- Ken Bonnell
That visiting parents get lost in,
They admire with pride
And are then stupified
On learning what kids' rent is costin'.
--- Elois
Since his condo did YUPPIFY,
Like "Sex in the City",
He ogled girls pretty,
But could not quite remember why.
--- Chris Papa
It's like the dorm at graduate school.
To truly YUPPIFY
You need a WIFI, (wireless network for internet connection)
--- Norm Brust
Whole regions with prices up. If I
Wanted to live there
Near Washington Square,
Where no decent ladies shtupify.
--- Daniel Ford
Where innocents often are slammmed
By unrighteous force,
As matter of course,
And with great injustices crammed.
--- Chris Papa
Accompanied by saber schism
And head removal
Without reproval,
Reveals character's priapism.
--- Daniel Ford
Would swim nude at zip centigrade.
With no suit of rubber,
'Cause just like whale blubber,
Those layers of fat, frost allayed.
--- Chris Papa
That Willy had snatched from the cradle,
And on pizza fed,
Was known to give head,
And things that no intern aide'll.
--- Chris Papa
Their figures, full bosomed and assed.
They're fun in the car,
And bound to go far,
With padding that's sure meant to last.
--- Chris Papa
But with other genes too, she was bred.
Many guys will opine,
She should carry a sign,
Saying "Dangerous Curves Are Ahead!"
--- Bob Dvorak
Though she really wanted him in bed.
But Willy said "No,
There I won't go!
That's sex, according to Senator Ted."
--- Norm Brust
The woman is solid and grounded;
If you care to sample,
Her bosom is ample;
She's ZAFTIG and pleasinly rounded.
--- Antigone
Remember, you're pleasingly plump!
Some men like to grab
What models call flab.
Just wait 'til age gives them a slump!
--- Barb
And ZAFTIG was the preferred taste,
Sugar daddies were raunchy
(And frequently paunchy)
And gave diamonds that really were paste.
--- Norm Brust
Who worked hard for what they might earn.
Their anger they'd vent
With the cheapskate gent,
By giving the clap in return.
--- Chris Papa
Would not last in U.S., because
Our Justice would howl
And scream and cry "Foul!
You've broken our anti-trust laws!"
--- Chris Papa
Is clownish John who's not too brainy,
Who nevertheless
Enjoys great success
Rocking emotions like Ma Rainy. ('20's jazz singer)
--- Daniel Ford
Can be surprisingly brainy.
You can't be too thick
And create a schtick
That's both funny and slightly insane-y.
--- Norm Brust
Something just like "Keystone Kop".
But as we see
It evidently
Relates to a comical wop.
--- Chris Papa
Arises at five to go labor.
He forgets to disarm
His vehicle alarm...
We call him the local ZEITGEBER.
--- Observer
Serves as an accurate ZEITGEBER.
It means autumn is here,
And winter is near,
And soon, with snow, we will labor.
--- Norm Brust
Gives us each a cue to day's labor.
Changes diurnal
Make life infernal
In commute to be shared with neighbor.
--- Daniel Ford
That's the signal that I like the best.
This ZEITGEBER sublime
Tell me that it's time
For martinis spiked with lemon zest.
--- Norm Brust
When morning, will shine in my eyes,
Or those of a neighbor
Is merely ZEITGEBER,
With the message that we should arise.
--- Chris Papa
Who is ready just as he gets up,
To rattle his plate
And quickly indicate
We'd better provide him some sup.
--- Chris Papa
Sharp as those Wilkinson sabers.
He barks for his chow,
"Not later, right now!"
Effectuve as bugles and tabors.
--- Chris Papa
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