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Slang for detective is HAWKSHAW, HAWKSHAW is the best divorce dick, HAWKSHAW could well play game of golf A HAWKSHAW of olde, bumbling sleuth, Don't mean to engage in strange quibblings Same sex marriage okay would misfire Marriage today invokes gay ire. If en route, you have to change a tire, In Florida, things HAYWIRE are norm. Pay attention! To the past hearken, There is something that may be said HEBETUDE is one attitude When lethargy becomes HEBETUDE, Nutritionists say they find There was HEBETUDINOUS dude, With pardonable pride they'd both beam, In Army, drill sergeant director, The bully does harrass and HECTOR Liberals view the private sector Of weighty import do matters' HEFT The youth, love-struck swain was bereft. A twenty stone HEFTY lass, mellow, HEGIRA, to escape the dread, No reason for Michael to feara, (said Don Vito to his son in "The Godfather".
Escaping danger on HEGIRA, One who commits an act HEINOUS Some folks like their sex, S&M. The "spinmeisters," with biased slants, A HELLKITE is shunned, so 'tis said; Happiness never seen the light, Hitler the HELLKITE caught a Jew; As Hitler got to eating, aghast, The butcher did search for a wife, Eight rhyme beats that I savor, Frightened sixty-fourth note bravers I once had a hen named of Meg Hendecagon sides of elevens, HENOTHEISM, as you can see, HENOTHEISM battles most creeds, The one god of HENOTHEISM Belief in one god before others With Mammon top dog in our V.I.P.s', Plant-crunching vegan, HERBIVORE, You'll find grass and veggies galore, Be prepared to burn at the stake A bird with a walk, HERKY-JERKY; The coke heads abound in the street; Some folks live up here like a hermit, Adopting subsistence life style Make mine HERMITAGE with a view, HERMITAGE, for those who dare, That gal whose heart didn't respond, "HERSTORY' brings consternation; Her sexual preference was orthodox It is exceedingly HETERODOX Against the norm is HETERODOX, Young shepherds to good morals hew, HIBERNACULA just ain't for me, HIBERNACULUM we all see, Whenever the word HIE is said, To the stores! To the malls! We must HIE! To Florida most old folks HIE, Doc's Rx's for purgative, HIEROGLYPHIC, When helping with cures quite terrific, Some picture symbols HIEROGLYPHIC Difficult signs HIEROGLYPHIC, I think old Egyptians terrific.
Even if Navajo or Choctaw,
Or that clever Holmes
Who's found in our homes,
Though not on the streets of Arkansaw.
--- Daniel Ford
Naked nabs, his signature trick.
When they reach for their clothes,
With an awkward pose,
That's when the camera goes 'click'.
--- Norm Brust
Without ever taking pants off;
Plaid pants are the style,
Though some folks might smile,
They'd not be so rude as to scoff!
--- Observer
Worked in a coat of houndstooth.
Surreptition was bad,
He wore pants of plaid,
In gaudy display, quite uncouth.
--- Chris Papa
Or endulge in gratuitous scribblings.
But should one disparage
A unisex marriage,
Where both of the partners are siblings?
--- Fran
Only if such a law would require
That both partners be
A he or a she
Now that would be really HAYWIRE.
--- Fran
They feel laws have all gone HAYWIRE.
While straight folks, instead,
Look on with great dread,
If laws are changed on some day dire.
--- Chris Papa
That's when everything goes HAYWIRE.
The lugs are frozen,
The wrong wrench you've chose,
And the rear wheels are stuck in the mire.
--- Norm Brust
First was failed paper chad storm.
Then push-button fuss
Caused primary blush.
Grant secession! That's election reform!
--- Larry McGrath
For when troubles to your door dorken,
You will want a Sue
Or some you-know-who
With whom to retire for some sparkin'.
--- Daniel Ford
For frolicking in a warm bed,
Without HEBETUDE,
But rather in mood
For amorous screwing instead.
--- Chris Papa
That I have not thought to include
In my daily life,
Because it was rife
Being screwed, blued, and tattooed!
--- Barb
Logophilia is not subdued.
But rather it flowers
In greater word powers;
And that's when you know you have it, Dude!
--- Daniel Ford
Overeating can dull the mind.
As we stuff the food in us,
We become hebetudinous,
As blood moves from brain to behind.
--- Norm Brust
Who dwelt in a hovel quite crude.
With moronic wife,
The love of his life
Who helped him raise a brutish brood.
--- Chris Papa
'Cause things were not dark as might seem.
With the help of Heaven,
Of sons, she'd eleven,
Who now are a pro football team.
--- Chris Papa
To rookies, looms as a spectre.
He'll see that you're fed,
And tuck you in bed,
And constantly badger and HECTOR.
--- Chris Papa
The defenseless with no protector;
Itching for a fight,
Or forging their flight,
Along some more divergent vector.
--- Daniel Ford
As a target which they joyfully HECTOR.
What they seem to ignore
As does their champion, Gore,
It's the mother load for the tax collector.
--- Norm Brust
Squeeze out others, with little left.
Such biased leaving,
Makes for bad weaving.
It's hard to tell warp from the weft.
--- Daniel Ford
His sweety had a curvy HEFT.
On strict diet lost
Her weight and the cost;
All bones now and nary soft cleft.
--- Chris Papa
was smitten with hundred pound fellow.
He expressed his love
Positioned above,
Like a buoy on a vast sea of Jell-O.
--- Elois
When one is with excess fear fed,
But poor Saddam went
To a hole with a vent
And had to be smoked out instead.
--- Chris Papa
Just convert some Dollars to Lira,
And while we cool
The New York Police pool,
You go have a lovely HEGIRA.
--- Gunjan
From the Bronx to far West Elmira,
The Gershin boys two,
Found tunefulness flew
From George through the keys to young Ira.
--- Daniel Ford
Is more than a pain in the anus;
The results are rough,
Especially tough
From those who must likely disdain us.
--- Chris Papa
I, for one, pity them.
"Oh please, mistress, chain us,
Then do something HEINOUS,"
They cry as they kiss the dom's hem. (dominatrix's)
--- Norm Brust
Use lies when they roar forth their rants.
It's their sleazy job
To promote some slob,
And serve as despised HEIROPHANTS.
--- Chris Papa
A lady who most folks might dread;
She may get her way,
But dubious pay.
Result is a cold lonely bed.
--- Chris Papa
Since the great connubial fight
'Bout how he got ill
From her cooking skill
And how she'd become a HELLKITE.
--- Chris Papa
At gunpoint made him eat dog doo.
The gun slipped his grasp,
And the Jew it did grasp,
And shouted, "Now it's your turn to..."
--- Gunjan
The old Jew made a getaway fast.
Home, he sighed with relief,
Says to wife, you won't believe
With whom today, I shared breakfast.
--- Gunjan
The HELPMEET of his married life,
Who would in bed hop,
Then work in his shop,
And help meat with cleaver and knife.
--- Chris Papa
This is file itl
HEMIDEMISEMIQUAVER,
Belongs to Time's thief,
A note that's so brief,
Amounting to almost a waiver.
--- Chris Papa
Of French Horn or trumpet flavors,
Would prefer tickling keys
For "Flight of Bumblebee's"
HEMIDEMISEMIQUAVERS.
--- Daniel Ford
Who could crow while she stood on one leg.
And when she was juiced,
She sometimes produced
A hendecahedron-shaped egg. (eleven sides)
--- Nancy Schimmel
Seem source of the "loonies" heavens.
Those who care to count
That absurd amount,
Are oft at "sixes and sevens."
--- Daniel Ford
Promotes such religiosity,
To many a soul,
At reasonable toll,
Is great ecuminic' P.C.
--- Chris Papa
Against their religionists' needs,
Where each god-go-getter
Decides he's much better,
And has all of world-wisdom seeds.
--- Chris Papa
Sounds somewhat like gallitheism,
Worshipping chicken
As the pots thicken,
While praying skies don't-hit-me-ism.
--- Daniel Ford
In no way religious smothers;
HENOTHEISM
Tennesseeism,
Even Jack Daniels had his druthers.
--- Daniel Ford
New HENOTHEISTIC hegemonies,
Of Fame, Good Looks, and High Class,
(Compassionless Gods, en masse,)
They wallow in lucre and felonies.
--- Elois
Munches nuts and seed by the score;
My girl Valerie's
Counting calories,
But you should have seen her before.
--- Daniel Ford
In gut of a pure HERBIVORE.
The fiberous mass,
Sure generates gas,
Contributes to earth-warming, more.
--- Chris Papa
If a HERETIC position you take.
Better say the earth's flat
Than to risk all that,
'Cause the bastards won't give you a break.
--- Norm Brust
The gobbler, American turkey.
Once nominated,
Very top-rated,
National emblem quite quirky.
--- Chris Papa
They think their bad habits are neat.
Their take HERMENEUTIC
On sin pharmaceutic,
Is endorphins that just can't be beat.
--- Chris Papa
But when they want to hunt, they need permit.
They raise lots of hell,
"All this Red Tape", they yell!
But "self interest" is how I would term it!
--- Barb
Isn't easy, by a long mile.
When It gets very cold,
It can get very old,
Viewing diminished wood pile!
--- Barb
And witty pals, quite a few,
And fruit of the berry,
So we can make merry,
And the thermnostat reads 72!
--- Barb
Is place where you find people rare,
Who solitude crave
And are willing to brave
The rigors of such pied-a-terre.
--- Chris Papa
Of whom Dave is exclusively fond,
Give no sign of pleasure,
From Dave's greatest treasure;
His expandable HERMITAGE wand.
--- Elois
Adds fuel to sex conflagration.
Is it not true
That what women do
Is fitfully called MENstruation?
--- Chris Papa
With strong predilection for HETERODOX,
But if some that she'd see
Had their Ph.D.
And fat purses, she'd swing with the ambi-docs.
--- J'Carlin
To eat mozzarella with your lox.
Unless you're like Chris,
Whose bi-ethnic bliss
Includes menus "outside the box."
--- Norm Brust
But when all choose the unorthodox,
Do they not become
The uniform some
Oft running like lemmings off the docks?
--- Daniel Ford
Knowing the right thing to do.
Their duty to keep
Watch over the sheep,
Not playing the ram to each ewe.
--- Chris Papa
Even if below zero I see!
If the mercury freezes,
I brave arctic breezes
By fireside, books, company!
--- Barb
In the U.S. for you and me,
When the North gets cold up,
Some natives get holed up
Near the warm shores of Miami.
--- Chris Papa
It means one should "get out the lead",
And move with great speed,
Go real fast, indeed,
Before one more moment has sped.
--- Chris Papa
Heed the call -- it's your duty to buy.
Indebt? Don't fear it.
Get the holiday spirit!
There'll be time in April to cry.
--- Phil Kinay
But yound Dan and I both get by;
When winter snows come,
Like polar bears numb,
Shivering and wondering why.
--- Chris Papa
On dosage was less than specific.
So results were rated
By patients constipated
From "nothing" to "really terrific."
--- Norm Brust
One's given prescription specific;
It's written you see,
All quite cryptically,
As medical HIEROGLYPHIC.
--- Chris Papa
Are found in caves and on walls cliffic,
In Ur and Chaldeas,
Conveying ideas
Semiotics now find pontific.
--- Daniel Ford
Interpretations nonspecific
And all sorts of Greek
That professors speak
To give them an air pontific.
--- Daniel Ford
They must have had some HIEROGLYPHIC
For upset tummies
Which produced the mummies,
Or maybe a good soporific!
--- Barb
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