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In chaotic regions INVIOUS,
Of pathfinders we are envious.
For each little step
Seems harder to schlep,
It requires some thinking devious.
--- Daniel Ford

Of all of life's ways INVIOUS,
Delightful is often the sinvious.
It may lead to Hell
But the trip is sure swell,
Despite raging preachers dinvious.
--- Chris Papa

IOTA, small lot, just a germ,
When comes to acceptance of sperm,
May be just a drop
From boyfriend on top,
Leads to other "wee thing" at full term.
--- Chris Papa

A dwarf of real IRACUND fame,
Did live with that sweet Snow White dame,
In the old tale of yore,
Most irked to his core,
And Grumpy was miscreant's name.
--- Chris Papa

Since Columbine came on the scene,
We're addressing the groups that are mean.
IRENIC we need,
As teachers will plead.
Our morals have grown rather lean.
--- Maggie

Aunt Irene, who loved gin and tonic,
Was frequently tart and ironic.
Venting spleen, she was splenic
And never IRENIC
And her rages were almost symphonic.
--- Eva Amata

There one was a poor schizophrenic,
Who wished for a life more serenic.
He never could tell
Which voice came from Hell,
Or which led to thoughts more IRENIC.
--- Chris Papa

To help him respond to despair,
Of Prozac, he takes quite a share.
It brings peace of mind,
This medicine kind;
Unchanged, he just hasn't a care.
--- Chris Papa

There are blondes who think it desirous
To possess eyes with a blue IRIS.
But blondes I love best
In my urgent quest,
Are those free of the herpes virus.
--- Chris Papa

Incongruous statements, IRISH BULL,
Often confirm that the wit is not full.
Yet they're so pregnant
That laughters regnant,
And we'll not think of that one as dull.
--- Daniel Ford

IRREDENTIST, don't think dental pain,
But more like attempt to regain
Some land lost before,
And is now point sore,
To one who'd erase such a stain.
--- Chris Papa

Those anti-theft devices are not untaggable,
And unless removed, your purchase is unbaggable.
But be of good cheer,
Just had it to the cashier.
This advice, believe me, is IRREFRAGABLE.
--- Norm Brust

Bon mots are wise saying, real cute,
IRREFRAGABLES hard to refute,
Like "Haste makes waste."
"No accounting for taste."
And "From ugly trees grows sweet fruit."
--- Chris Papa

There is IRREFRAGABLE notion
That all the election commotion,
To no one's surprise
Is just pack of lies,
And bold, shameless self-promotion.
--- Chris Papa

The common folks out in the street,
"Irregardless" use as adverb neat;
REGARDLESS, however,
Is surely more clever,
The thinking man's truncated treat.
--- Chris Papa

Fools IRRUPT where angels will not go;
Wake sleeping dogs, seeds of chaos sow.
With narrow view
Of what to do,
Think just force will vanquish the foe.
--- Elois

Explosively bursting-in, to IRRUPT,
Is angry father's way to disrupt
An evening's seduction
Of his tax deduction,
In hopes of foreshortening abrupt.
--- Daniel Ford

When he seemed immersed deep in prayer,
In his mind, the Mad Monk might share
Ideas of a sort
Of different sport;
ITHYPHALLIC smile he would wear.
--- Chris Papa

At the mound in his trousers she stared;
No embarrassment would he be spared.
Then she asked with a grin,
Pointing to his linchpin,
"Ithyphallic?" as if she really cared.
--- Esther

The festivals Bacchanalic,
Roman era and italic,
Feature food and wine
And women supine,
With gentlemen ITHYPHALLIC,
--- Norm Brust

There once was an ITINERANT preacher,
Who'd bed every maid if he'd reach her.
Until he met Sal,
A rather loose gal,
Who became his dire V.D. teacher.
--- Chris Papa

There are several crude folks I know,
Make other's lives hard, and just so,
Would benifit much
From the gentle touch
On bottoms with a JACKBOOT's toe.
--- Chris Papa

In our life, coffee's never JAMOKE,
But rather the street-resident bloke,
Whose run-ins with cops
In stations and shops
Seem to cause the denizens to choke.
--- Daniel Ford

In government, it's not contrary
With being a pol JANISSARY.
You vote with no sense
Nor have a conscience,
Make policy poor and quite scary.
--- Chris Papa

When Lyndon Johnson used to JAWBONE,
His former colleagues felt all alone
And could only sputter
About guns and butter,
Then pass legislation to atone.
--- Daniel Ford

JAWBONING, a technique quite crass,
With appeals through the popular mass,
A dangerous sport,
When done by the sort
Of pol with 'jawbone of an ass.'
--- Chris Papa

In Congress where debate often passes,
As poor pabulum for the masses,
May also appear
To those far and near,
As just JAWBONING of the asses
--- Chris Papa

Michael Jackson with his dark glasses,
Speaking directly to the masses,
Said, "Forget all you've heard.
I swear all that occured
Was just JAWBONING of asses.
--- Gunjan

I told my classes that JAWBONING,
When inflation is out on the wing,
Won't do any good,
Be it understood,
Market forces are stronger than king.
--- Larry Falk

JAWBONING's coercion's close clone,
Like wheedling funds via phone.
If legal or not,
It helps fill the pot,
But depletes our good moral tone.
--- Chris Papa

Conservatives have resorted to JAWBONING
To halt progress in human cloning.
One gets up and yells
"We don't need more stem cells,"
Leaving biologists and others groaning.
--- Norm Brust

LBJ, well know for JAWBONING,
Would leave them in the aisles moaning,
Quizzically wondering
At inept blundering,
Which them demanded atoning.
--- Daniel Ford

In youth, love making is mellow,
When you're a well endowed fellow,
But time alone brings
A change in some things,
And then your endowment is JELL-O.
--- Chris Papa

This is file iol

JELL-O is soluble collagen,
Promoted by Cosby paladin,
Strange comestible,
Made ingestible
By flavors, jingles, comic djinn.
--- Daniel Ford

Enjoy JELL-O then, while gobbling,
As off to your dinner you're hobbling.
It's still a big deal,
Your mouth get to feel,
Something soft, nice, and wobbling.
--- Chris Papa

Yes, Age is a bit of undoing,
Just simple every chewing,
Becomes a real chore,
The diet in store,
Not steak, but JELL-O a brewing.
--- Chris Papa

JEREMIAD will make weary ears,
And bring the poor listener to tears,
With long tales of woe,
And "I told you so!",
Ad infinitum, for years.
--- Chris Papa

A JEREMIAD understood
Directed at ways to be good,
By raising such fears
That cotton in ears
Is needed to do what you should.
--- Chris Papa

"To Jericho!", I'll save for the ladies,
The Emilys, Anns, and Mercedes,
Informing a fate
Of having to wait,
Or else to just hie to the Hades.
--- Chris Papa

The remote walled-city, JERICHO,
Holds many who'd hide where to go.
Though walls may crumble
From horn blasts humble,
It's not a place I'd tarry so.
--- Daniel Ford

It's not only ladies who go
To domestic state's hell, JERICHO.
When hubby shuts up,
Withoholding his tup,
It's reversal of roles, don't you know?
--- Elois

JESUIT priests use casuistry,
Rationalization, and sophistry
To foibles explain
And faithful retain,
In folds of religious artistry.
--- Daniel Ford

Once that the country all knew it,
Sad fact is that Monica blew it;
With no sex life left,
Slick Willy bereft,
Enlisted as novice JESUIT.
--- Chris Papa

New York has its JEUNESSE DOREE;
You can see them up and down Broadway.
They're prolific e-mailers
And spend like drunk sailors,
And party till the break of day.
--- Norm Brust

Daughter, shun the JEUNESSE DOREE.
From that fast crowd, please stay away!
You may like their cars
And nights in the bars,
But to them you are just a quick lay.
--- Chris Papa

I once hung with the JEUNESSE DOREE;
Now I run with the foxes, quite grey.
I still drive fast cars,
And cruise single bars,
And take Viagra with One-A-Day. (vitamins)
--- Norm Brust

Gilded young people, JEUNESSE DOREE,
With time and gold for any foray,
Think nothing of dashing
Through fountains and splashing
Some vicars, then shouting "Ole!"
--- Daniel Ford

Those French kids, JEUNESSE DOREE,
Like to just frolic and play.
None of them works;
They're a bunch of young jerks
Who'll all be on welfare one day.
--- Chris Papa

Just look at our JEUNESSE DOREE;
Their habit of fashion today,
Are loose fitting clothes,
And little of those;
Expensive but sloppy display.
--- Chris Papa

Youth of wealth's fashion, JEUNESSE DOREE,
Often go shopping in dress foray,
Then buy pasties round
For sums that astound,
Going naked as vicious Moray.
--- Daniel Ford

The American jeunesse doree
Flood the movies and are on TV!
But their sway has shortfall,
And in no time at all,
A "has been" is all they will be.
--- Barb

Their sticking power is short,
If they have no talent to sport.
Unless I miss my guess,
Their lives are a mess,
Which papers are just too glad to report.
--- Barb

While sleeping one off in Miami,
Jim woke feeling flushed and quite clammy.
His problem perhaps:
Too many nightcaps;
He'd thoroughly soaked his JimJammy.
--- Gary Hallock

Poor student who urgently crams
For important final exams,
May often sleep lack
Or be on Prozac
To counter those jumpy JIMJAMS.
--- Chris Papa

There was a young girl we'll call Millie
Who met a young cad we'll call Billy.
He pulled out too late.
Now she's in a state
Of JIMJAMS! Won't he or will he?
--- Barb

Among composers for whom game's fair
Is one who often took challenge, dare.
From Cape to Glouster
Young Stephen Foster
Touted JINNI with the Light Brown Hair.
--- Daniel Ford

A guy wasn't too good in bed;
He faced poor performance with dread.
So called on a JINNI,
To perk up his weenie,
Who prescribed Viagra instead.
--- Chris Papa

The supernatural powered JINNI
May be good, but more often is meany.
They have made for stories
Of misdeeds and glories
From Ali Baba to Rossini.
--- Daniel Ford

I took my love on a cheap date,
And asked her if we couldn't mate.
"What, in this JITNEY?"
And I thought I'd get knee
In place that I call "Heaven's Gate."
--- Chris Papa

Limericks are JOCOSE at their best,
When from jocular brains they are wrest.
They are worthy of laughs
Unless poetic gaffes;
Which won't pass the "jest test"!
--- Barb

She didn't know how to appease
Mer mom's seething ire, if you please,
When in girl's room she found
Hung from bed post around,
A pair of a young man's JOC UNDies.
--- Elois

A prankster, a real JOCUND jerk,
Devoted to devious work,
Elicited chaffs,
More often than laughs;
Now lives all alone with his smirk.
--- Chris Papa

JOHN BARLEYCORN is pleasure giver,
Except that he'll take you down-river
And bad acts expose.
He'll redden your nose,
Then leave you a cirrhotic liver.
--- Chris Papa

The trouble with JOHN BARLEYCORN
Lies in remains of after morn,
when contents of head
Seem approaching dead,
And you wish you'd never been born.
--- Daniel Ford

While Hillary stumps New York hills,
Entrancing each Dem jont she fills,
The places she gets
In government jets
Is 'cause JOHN Q PUBLIC pays the bills.
--- Chris Papa

Average Joe is JOHN Q PUBLIC,
Heart and soul of our dear republic,
Whom pol hand some Spam
Dressed up like a ham,
And see reactions only bubblic.
--- Daniel Ford


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