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An ambitious young trull named McPherson Jay moaned on the phone, "Listen, Georgia, You've been bad, old grouch Ebenezer! Said a whore to a fellow named Meyer, No cash to buy ass had McDuff; A handsome young lad of Carmel There once was a wench, I am told, A girl who for virtue could care not There was a streetwalker discreet Observed an old prelate named Lowndes, There was an old madam named Bates Her body, a terrific treasure, There's a very sweet girl named Louise I once wooed a gal in a Jeep "The price," said the whore from Livonia, The lady from old Abu Dhabi Poor Morris, whose pals called him Dick, My friend Willy's mom's a great fuck, To the call-girl went horny young Mahler, I read in the paper today Said the harlot to stockbroker Lynch, There once was this lady from Tyre, In a paint ball action most crude, Il y avait une demoiselle d'Aix Oh Maggie, you sly little lass, They call her the lay of the land; There's a girl up at Three Valley Lake When invading UK in the war, A Los Angeles hooker named Fay Another young girl named Louise To a well-endowed maiden named Gloria A soft-hearted harlot named Bryce A seductive young lady from Lansing Sarah, sleek CYPRIAN slut, There was a young fellow named Doak; Most men looked at her charms and said, "Nice!" (HF - Hollywood madam of early 1990's)
"Shall we?" said Fred pinching Flo, "Give in to your filthy desires? Hey girls! Yes, you heard me a-right. With a great deal of help launch his seed, At the brothel the other day Now I admit to carry some weight, Another girl wanted pay by the minute; There was a young girl from Alaska, (And, occasionally, John Jacob Astor.)
There was a young girl from Lancaster, There was a young lady named Bastor, I asked if a million would do So I asked if a fin would repay "And just what", she questioned with ice, You know just what Jenny is, right? This Jenny might be a soiled dove, Now that you know what Jenny is "Is it thou?" "Ay," cries Fra Lippo Lippi, So they up and went at it like knives, Harry met the young girl on a cruise; And when it was over and done, She is bold, she is hot, she is willing, She is bold, she is hot, she is willing, The seductive Dolores could lay so A versatile harlot named Breech, What I'd like to do if I could, Any whore whose door sports a red light, There was an old harlot named Shields A torrid old tart of Timiskaming A notorious whore named Miss Hearst, The sex show at Rose's now closes
Leased the sexual right to her person
To rich Arab sheiks
And other sex freaks,
And left the rest of us ravin' and cursin'.
--- G1827
I'd love to, but I can't afforgia.
I simply can't pay
Fifty bucks for a lay,
Which is why, for three months, I ain't borgia!"
--- Grand Prix Lim 993
Your wife knows how often you pleased her;
That cute little whore
In down town Singapore;
You should have used cash, not your VISA!
--- Friar A
"It is fifty for fucking me, sire."
"I'll save money," he swore,
So he married the whore,
But he found that the price was now higher.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1607
Said the whore with a laugh, "That is tough."
To him trousers she threw,
As she bid him adieu.
"You can have one," she said, "on the cuff."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1591
Wouldn't buy what the girls had to sell,
Unless given it twice (Since at sex he was through)
At one-third the price, (In a minute or two)
So the girls shrugged and said, "Go to hell."
--- Isaac Asimov
Who sold favors only for gold.
She'd do anything nice
For the right price,
But for silver she went dead cold.
--- Arwen McDouball
Was as tough and as tight as a square knot.
She only would lay
Spurred by plenty of pay,
By an old millionaire who had hair not.
--- Chairman Steve
Who would not cut her price for a treat,
For she said, prices low
Would not bring enough dough,
And she'd find herself out on the street.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1490
"Inflation quite clearly astounds;
When I was a kid,
Sex cost but a quid,
Now trollops demand fifty pounds."
--- Armand Singer
Superbly endowed by the fates.
She was in such demand,
If you got out of hand,
She would charge you the overtime rates.
--- Albin Chaplin
To men, in many a measure,
Came at a fixed price,
Which netted her nice
Posh PECUNIARY pleasure.
--- Chris Papa
Whose sex-play is certain to please.
Her charms are unique,
Likewise her technique,
But she charges prohibitive fees.
--- Isaac Asimov
And hoped a reward I would reap.
I pitched my best woo
And she said she'd like to,
But dammit, her price was too steep.
--- Neal Wilgus P8405
"Is fifty, and I'll have to phone ya."
Said the fellow named Reese,
"I just came for a piece,
And I really do not want to own ya."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1584
Whose edacity rivalled Dear Abby,
And with hooters prodigious,
Wooing verged on religious,
So her income remaind far above shabby.
--- Robert Elliot
(A name that pure logic would pick)
Enjoyed making merry
Partaking of Sherry,
At two hundred dollars a trick!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
And on Mondays, it's only a buck.
There is no wine and dine,
Just wait there in line.
But I'm broke, therefore Shit-Out-Of-Luck.
--- Frijole T9711
But her price made the poor fellow holler.
So he said, "I would pay
The high bucks for a lay,
If your pussy would shrink like the dollar."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1595
Of call girls and high rates of pay.
When choosing vocation,
Forget education,
Teach your daughters to be a good lay!
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0302
"My ass is ten dollars per inch."
Said Lynch, "You have blundered;
That makes two hundred,
But I won't pay a cent if you flinch."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0526
Who filled every man with desire.
Ten quid was enough
For your back seat stuff,
But fees for one night were much higher.
--- Tim Hopkins
Little Bambi is stalked in the nude.
"Gotcha!" yelled he.
"Ten thousand!" cried she,
"And then I am yours to be screwed."
--- The Sailor P0308
Qui demanda, "Mas qu'est-ce que c'est--SEX?"
Une vielle dit, "Je sais!
C'est ce que cherchent les Anglais,
Mais n'acceptez pas travellers' cheques!"
--- Peter Seward G1733
You've shown us "hot stuff" under glass.
Our senses perplex,
With visions of sex,
But high price for 'tumble on grass'.
--- Anon
Each session's a modest 2 grand.
Prolonged penile pleasure
Makes her a real treasure.
Men come at her express command.
--- Esther Koch P9911
Who is said to be "not hard to take."
All you need, I've been told
Is two ounces of gold,
Some champagne, and a porterhouse steak.
--- John E Mayhood P0900
US Forces had money galore.
And this was the lark;
Any whore and house shark
Could charge up twice over and more.
--- Bill Backe-Hansen P8901
Said, "My game is playing for pay.
Though my prices are high,
Men will pay because I
Always bring lots of skill to L.A."
--- Bob Giandomenico P8805
Would hand out her personal keys
To handsome young men,
Every now and again,
But only for very high fees.
--- Isaac Asimov
I said, "I would like see moria,"
And she said, "Well, you may
If you're willing to pay
For a suite at the Waldorf Astoria."
--- Alsops Foibles
Was fucking a gentleman nice.
He was ready to blow
When she let the man know
She expected an increase in price.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-2946
Found pleasure in penthouse romancing.
But wherever she went
She wouldn't stay pent
Unless she had proper financing.
--- Lims Unlimited
This is file gkm
Can never keep her warm thighs shut.
This sporty young maid
Is frequently laid,
And well paid by dudes in the rut.
--- Chris Papa
Fate played upon him a cruel joke.
His wife had an obsession
For her former profession,
And she charged him until he went broke.
--- Albin Chaplin
They would call for a date once or twice.
But though they adored her,
Few could afford her,
'Cause this chick worked for Heidi Fleiss!
--- Ann Gasser P9408
"Or are you as pure as the snow?"
"That's two questions," said she,
"And my answer must be
--If you've got fifty bucks--yes and no."
--- John Ciardi
I should say not!" cried snotty Miss Myers.
"The only thing free
I do with it is pee --
As for fucking, I've dozens of buyers."
--- G1771
That's five hundred dollars a night,
By downloading spunk
From all blokes, from a hunk
To a puny spam poster, who might...
--- Anon
But spammers cannot ever breed,
By fucking great tarts,
Their wee shrivelled parts
Will only react to dumb greed.
--- Anon
A whore said I would have to pay,
Not by the trick
Or the length of my prick,
But according to the pounds that I weigh.
--- Puff Adder
As a result of cleaning my plate.
But a sudden brain wave
Told me how I could save,
If I just went honme to masturbate.
--- Puff Adder
In other words, how long I was in it.
That's cheap as I reckons,
If she'll prorate the seconds;
A minute is way past my limit.
--- Puff Adder a
Who could, and she would, if you asked her.
But she thought she was nice,
And so high was her price,
That no one could have her, save Jesus H. Christ.
--- Anon
Who'd do anything anyone asked her.
But when she got spliced,
She got so high-priced,
Only Jesus H. Christ and John Jacob Astor.
--- L0989
Who always said "No" when they asked her.
But she took down her britches
For rich sons of bitches,
Like Morgan and John Jacob Astor.
--- G1737
For Jenny to give me a screw.
She thought for a trice,
Then said she'd be nice,
And probably suck on it too.
--- Anon
The cost of said contracted lay.
She grew quite irate,
And yelled at me, "Mate,
Just ain't gonna happen, no way!"
--- Anon
"Do you think I am? Be concise!"
My answer did scar:
"We know what you are.
We're now on to dickering price!"
--- Anon
It will get you nowhere tonight.
To pander to greed,
And then just proceed
Over money to start a big fight.
--- Anon
But she's right to give you the shove.
Because you're so cheap
No way could you keep,
Her in the high-class style she'd love.
--- Anon
I think you should take this short quiz:
You've offered to pay,
So what would you say
That means 'bout your lure to a Ms.?
--- Anon
"Zooks, lass, 'tis confoundedly nippy.
But slip out of your gown,
And I'll give you a crown,
Or two more, But we'd best make it slippy."
--- Gerard Bensen
Or they humped (shall I say it?) as their lives
Were dependent on what
They performed and they got
To the climax in just twenty drives.
--- Gerard Benson
She was fair from her hat to her shoes.
He got her in bed
And she even gave head,
But it cost 50 bucks worth of booze.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0205
She said, "I admit it was fun,
But my usual charge
Isn't nearly so large;
So I've screwed you in more ways than one."
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0205
But his will Will will first have to fill in.
With her future secure,
She'll let William screw her.
Sign it, Will, if you must dip your quill in.
--- Tutta Gioia
But Bill she is billing for billing
And cooing. Poor Bill's
To be billed for refills,
While that chick, she is making a killing.
--- Tutta Gioia
Well, she earned many a peso,
From men who walked miles
To climax, with smiles.
(Her ads in the papers all say so.)
--- Isaac Asimov
Ten methods of fucking did teach.
But a man in a bind
Could not make up his mind,
So he tried a small portion of each.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1456
Is boff a bad whore -- yes, I would;
But from what I've found,
There's no whore around
Thats 'bad' -- no, they're all very good!
--- Anon
Knows a prick when she sees one, all right.
She can tell by a glance
At the drape of men's pants,
If they're worth taking on for the night.
--- L1029
Who never to critics did yield.
She settled all rumors
With Approved by Consumers,
And her rating was best in her field.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1658
Was so skilful, no partner could miss coming.
And Saturday nights
Were suffused with delights
As her clients exploded in bliss coming.
--- Keith MacMillan 73a
In the pleasures of men is well versed.
Reads a sign o'er her head,
Of her well-rumpled bed:
"The customer always comes first!"
--- Playboy Mag L1018
With Rose in positional poses,
While the audience studs
Keep inserting their puds,
So that everyone's coming up Rose's!
--- Playboy Mag J F O'Conner
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