MORE
Those bitches, they touched, licked and kissed; That night I thought I'd be their hero; Now folks if you ever should be It's you backwoods boys from the sticks, Good reason to get out my Witch hat Said the agile young dyke, "In a bind, There was a young belle from Bombay, (Out of the closet - to acknowledge homosexuality)
I'm seldom a PC offender (politically correct) Overdue questions now have begun, She worked at the Mullah's behest, Gushed pervert and pederast Brad, There once was a Dutchman named Mike I knew this young lady named Anna, A beautiful gal named Vandyke Said a cute little lesbian Swede, The Bistro was known as Cumquat Tree, Please tell me, what is the address? The address, as you see, is as follows: The tile in my bathroom is striking, Our muses have all cried "Manana", There was an old lady named Beryl A Lesbian Dutch girl named Wyck "I'll screw any girl that I like," My friend's mom, boy, she's a whore, There once was a fellow named Roddy, A shameless Dutch lesbo named Wyke The lesbian hooker felt snide, A closeted dyke had a song in her, There once was a dyke name of Sue, An aristocrat, Lady Nanette, There's no need to look at me oddly, My lesbian friend said "I'm horny, I replied, "The solution is clear. "What luck!" said the lass, "I might screw you. I was slightly offended, but fark it -- Miss Lewinsky, one fine autumn day We men should not put up a fuss So well stacked was the coed named Brenda, While sitting in a dim-lighted bar, Joan's note to her hubby said: "Bye, There was a young tart from the South End, There was a young girl from Decatur, A Lesbian on a divan Said Helen to Sappho, "Away us! A group of blind Lesbians were lunchin' There was a young man they called Mike; There once was a dyke from B.C. Well, the straight folk can think what they like Last night, your girlfriend I stole; A lady who lived in Corfu A naive college student named Mike, There once was a woman named Gwen, I'll tell you the tale of Fred Moss; Well, you can imagine the gloom There was a wierd chick called May, I knew her when he was Jose, Mused a lesbian schemer named Wild, A lesbian raped in Van Nuys Religious beliefs of May Quick, If by Sappho you're tempted, my dear, I once wrote a song with those words, For lesbians, there is not a cure. There was a young lady named Sherry So well stacked was a freshman named Brenda, I saw when she reached her MG, I approached and I said, "Will you hear
Not one spec of body was missed.
Their titties they nuzzled;
Their pussies they guzzled;
Ignoring me, I was quite pissed.
--- Travis Brasell
Instead I got nothing but zero;
No, I take that back,
Before the dawn's crack,
I got the hell out in that pirogue.
--- Travis Brasell
On Bourbon Street, and you should see
A sexy Mulatto,
Remember her twatto
Has never been ravaged by me.
--- Travis Brasell
Should be leery of Bourbon Street chicks.
Watch out for the cutie
That offers you bootie;
Attached you'll find balls and a prick!
--- Goin2later
And attempt to assuage a hot itch that
I've felt for a while,
Let me treat you in style -
I'll come round for some nasty clit chat.
--- Anon
There's thousands of ways we can grind...
Why, lodged back to back,
I can still reach her crack --
Though her clit is a bit hard to find."
--- John Miller Q
Who never had thought herself gay.
'Till a queen from Siam
Said, "My dear, you're not jam!"
And brought that one out right away.
--- L0455
But a lesbian's not a contender
With a man who's possesive,
Since she's mannish depressive
And full of delusions of gender.
--- Hugh Clary
Somewhat late since the damage is done.
Let's review the condition
Of the great coalition,
In the main, a group of merely one.
--- Loren Fitzhugh
Conducting a bomb-making test.
The explosion was small,
Didn't hurt her at all,
But it burned all the hair off her chest.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun
"The best kind of sex that I've had:
A long night's delight,
A hot catamite,
That succulent nude Persian lad."
--- Ward Marden
Who brought on a lesbian strike
Through no fault of his own;
By birth he was prone
To trying to finger a dyke.
--- Norm Storer
She hung with a gal called Roxana...
While not 'xactly gay
They'd do girls halfway
Then watch as they sang "Oh Susannah"
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Had actions quite unladylike.
No man dared to date her
Much less masturbate her;
She's always in dutch; she's a dyke.
--- Tom Patton P0609
With a hole to be plugged, she'll concede,
"I know you are Dutch,
So it shouldn't take much.
I'm a dyke -- it's a finger I need."
--- Bob Birch
And elegant intimate dykerie...
For girls with pert tits
And perky young clits,
The management waived every fee.
--- Ogni Gioia
I want to watch lezzies caress.
And fondle and squeeze,
Poke, prod, and tease;
At what, I'll just let you guess.
--- Funny Bone
Soixante-neuf Avenue des Apollos.
But they only let in
Those to Sappho akin,
Who have at their crotch, dusky hollows.
--- Ogni Gioia
The girl in the shower's a dykeling.
She's a sweet fine young thing,
And she makes my heart sing,
And performs very much to my liking.
--- Anon
And trundled off back to nirvana,
To nakedly run
In lesbian fun,
With help from electric bananas.
--- Anon
Who had a young sister named Cheryl.
Some people did say
That these women were gay,
'Cause Beryl and Cheryl were feral.
--- Aussie Owl
Was walking along down the pike,
When horrors, some lad,
Abysmally bad,
Plunged finger deep into the dyke.
--- Armand E Singer 21
Said an amorous Dutchman named Mike.
But sad though it seems,
The girl of his dreams
Had her finger stuck in a dyke.
--- Sam Pittman TP9806A
But one day she pissed on the floor!
For when the door bell rang
She opened the thang;
There was her gay love from the store!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who was trapped in a woman's body.
Her therapist said,
It was all in her head,
But it was his head in her body.
--- Anon
Fell hard for a pert sapphic tyke;
She strapped on her dildo,
Though lacking much spildo,
And plugged up the hole in the dyke.
--- Armand Singer
To her eager johns having their ride.
Though she yelled out for more,
She thought "I could snore!
But I feed all my friends on Northside."
--- Bruce Thompson
For her rich hubby saw nothing wrong in her.
She was a plucky young wench,
And tried not to flinch,
As he thrust his huge purple-veined dong in her.
--- Bruce Thompson
Who loved to take girls out to screw.
I'd never defame her --
Can't say that I blame her --
You see, I'm a lesbian, too!
--- Laurence U
Was helped at her daily toilette
By a tease of a maid,
Just made to be laid,
So my Lady obliged that coquette.
--- Tutta Gioia
Or tell me that I am ungodly,
'Cause I fancy Karen,
And Sharon, not Darren...
I'm a lesbian in a man's body.
--- Anon
But fisting's beginning to bore me.
With five fingers up it,
I feel like a Muppet.
I'm sick of my bitch speaking for me."
It's a penis you're needin' my dear.
They're built for the job,
Plus they'll fit in your gob,
And I happen to have one right here!"
This is file ggm
I've never been that fond of hoo-hoo;
A big pair of tits,
They're my favourite bits,
And most men ain't got 'em but you do!
It's not every day I can park it.
Most girls aren't impressed
With my man-booby chest,
But it's big in the lesbian market.
A sleazy new tale did convey.
She said, "On a whim
I licked Hillary's quim
Now I go the DeGeneres way."
--- Anon
When a woman for women has lust.
For it should be clear,
It's not at all queer;
She just likes the same thing as us.
--- Brasell
All the studs wished to part her pudenda.
But to their dismay,
They found her first lay
Was not Tom, Dick, or Harry, but Glenda.
--- Smitdog Duarte
I noticed her there from afar.
But instead of a mister,
She went home with my sister,
So I walk with a limp to my car.
--- Anon
But please know it's no other guy;
It's just that I've got
To have in my twat
The tongue of your sister -- that's why!"
--- Anon
Tried lesbian sex with a girl friend.
With a moan and a grunt,
She licked her mates cunt,
And loved the experience no end.
--- Anon
Who fought her parents plans to mate her.
They sent her boys,
Both Jews and goys,
But she loved the woman who ate her.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Ate sushi right out of the can.
The smell of the fish
And the rice made her wish
That her lover'd come back from Japan!
--- Thunderwing
And quick, before Sparta's in chaos.
Young Paris ain't scary;
I think he's a fairy;
But stay, and I fear Menelaus."
--- Anon
Together to have a big luncheon.
But no one could tell,
Except by the smell,
Exactly whose cunt each was munchin'.
--- Alan Oz
A person you just had to like.
He chatted up Pat,
Who turned him down flat.
He reckoned that she was a dyke.
--- Gaz Perch
Who went off on a hetero spree.
She said, "With some luck
I might get a fuck
From a like-minded lesbo like me."
--- Sherm Brucker
But gay unions are going on strike.
They'd respected the law
Up until the last straw,
When the Judge said to take in a dyke.
--- Neal Wilgus P8608
I decided to fill up her hole.
But I ran away
When she said she was gay;
Her hole was no longer a goal.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Heard quaffing semen's good for you.
But her tunnel was sapphic
And closed to male traffic,
So its health food she had to eschew.
--- Robert Elliot
Who majored in Abnormal Psych,
When he tried to take May
For a roll in the hay,
Said, "I wasn't informed she's a dyke!"
--- Frank Ward P9310
Who was rated by most as a "ten",
Which was hard on the guys
Who had lust in their eyes,
Because Gwen wasn't partial to men.
--- Cap'n Bean P0508
At salesmanship he was a dead loss.
He couldn't sell ewes
For Aussie blokes screws,
Or dildoes to ladies Lesbos.
--- Tiddy Ogg
That descended on ancient Khartoum
When the judge's decision
Made lesbianism
An improper use of the womb.
--- Neal Wilgus P8507
Who contemplated being gay.
She found a sexy, big-titted chick,
Without the complications of a dick,
And now all she says is "YAY!!!"
--- Anon
And sang in a Spanish cafe.
Looking for romance,
He found Ogg in France,
And became a woman that day.
--- Anon
Simply mad about spawning a child,
"Milking sperm from the brothers
Of significant others,
Will insure no two fam'lies defiled."
--- Armand Singer
By a passel of passionate guys
Said, "I thought hetero-sexing
Would be very vexing,
But this session's sure opened my thighs!"
--- Grand Prix Lim 533
The dyke, make her worried and sick.
You're reincarnated
As what you most hated,
She's going to come back as a prick.
--- Tiddy Ogg
From her you have nothing to fear.
Try her a while,
Return that sweet smile,
And see how you feel in a year.
--- TuttaGioia
But lesbian friends thought them turds.
They said "Hi, you're hairy,
And sometimes quite scary.
And No, you can't check us for curds!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection
I have tried, of this I am sure.
But I've often been told,
"It's much nicer to hold,
Than all the dick I must endure."
--- Funny Bone
Seduced by the lesbian Mary.
She found love that day,
And with dykes she'll stay,
But she still hasn't lost her cherry.
--- Anon
That the studs yearned to part her pudenda.
So they all were irate
When her first campus date,
Wasn't Tom, Dick, or Harry -- but Glenda!
--- Playboy Mag J F O'Conner
The breeze pressed her skirt to her vee.
I caught her sweet scent
As I sensed discontent,
I thought, if she'd just hear my plea.
--- Ogni Gioia
What I feel in my heart, without fear?"
She gazed in my eyes
And showed no surprise.
Then I whispered so soft in her ear...
--- Ogni Gioia
MORE