Oh you know me, my chastity's big
As my bum and I'll not take a swig.
But in summer sun's glow
I (do come watch the show!)
Trasmutate to a Sheela Na Gig.
--- Anon

A beautiful girl from the West
Had fake tits installed in her chest.
She told the young surgeon,
"Did you know I'm a virgin?"
Anesthesia put that to the test.
--- Anon

Minerva could swallow my sword
Right down to the hilt whilst I poured
Good will by the gallon,
In her eager jowl un-
Derstanding she'd never be gored.
--- SFA Q

I like them so young and so pure;
Lovely soft spoken, demure.
I'm talking eighteen,
A real virgin queen.
They're so much the better to skewer.
--- MrMalo

Have your brain waves gone ever so flat?
I fear you will never find that
Real virgin queen;
Not at age 18.
Were you out in the sun with no hat?
--- Frank Fazed

Now I have been wearing my hat;
Finding virgins ain't hard as all that.
So I'll help you to steer ya';
I've narrow criteria;
Look for girls who are ugly and fat.
--- Frank Fazed

I'm not picky as I used to be;
They all look scrumptions to me.
All softness and curves
And a boon to us perves,
And at my age, I can't hardly see.
--- Frank Fazed

Please pardon my brief inquisition,
It might be a source of derision.
These chubby unspoiled...
Are they still unsoiled?
What is it that's impaired your vision?
--- Frank Fazed

The reason I ask 'bout your sight
Is 'cause that I've had quite a fright.
I can't find one that's fat,
Or ugly, 'sides that...
I've hair on my palms; that's not right.
--- Frank Fazed

Those types of girls do exist
And I'm living proof of this.
We're a dying breed,
Activists are all peeved
'Cause we're not on the endangered list!
--- Claire

While boreal winters have no spark,
Adventurers still try to make mark
By seducing maids
In the ice cream trades,
To believe cherry's walk in the park.
--- Daniel Ford

In a bind was a seamstress of Hasting --
She spent her time sewing and basting.
It was needles(s) to say
She did not mend her way,
Sew it seems that her hole life was wasting.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1349

Arabella's a terrible prude:
She says, "Men are beasts. Men are Lewd.
A girl has to watch
Or a hand's on her crotch,
And the next thing she knows, she is screwed."
--- Grand Prix Lim 172 G1594

There was an Old Lady of Prague,
Whose language was horribly vague;
When they said, "Are you chaste?"
She replied, "What a waste!"
She meant "chased" but her brain hit a snag.
--- Edwardian Leer 102

Enough of my innocent state;
You've disrupted it, at any rate.
As experience vicarious
Is much less precarious,
I enjoy what you serve on this plate.
--- Anon

A cautious young fellow named Lynn
Said, "Always go easy with sin;
You have to be wary
Of untested cherry;
You're never quite sure where it's been."
--- Armand E Singer 301

To the sound of his beat-up old clavier,
A satyr in Xenia named Xavier,
Pops girl's maidenheads
In rumpled broad beds,
With his highly unmusical behavior
--- G0550

A cowardly baker, none cowarder,
Liked a sweet piece of cake so he showered her,
From her buns to her head
With the makings of bread;
Then it is said, he de-floured her.
--- Pierce Evans

An Everest climber named Baer
Attacked a young virgin at prayer.
And on a mere whim,
He punctured her quim,
Quite simply because it was there.

(apologies to Mallory)
--- Armand E Singer 200

Before she was voted Miss Teen,
She was virginal, pure, and pristine.
But in our society,
Her former propriety
Had vanished before it was missed e'en.
--- Laurence Perrine P8811

A middle-aged doctor named Saul,
Met an innocent girl in late fall.
Though he bought her no ring,
Long before the next spring,
She wasn't a virgin at all.
--- Popsicle TP9807

There was a young girl named Venus,
Who had never encountered a penis.
When Van Stone threw his in,
It went up to her chin,
For the bore, not the stroke, was the meanest.
--- L0904V

There once was a girl from Berlin,
Who lost her virginity to a Finn.
Now her cherry's gone bad,
But don't feel too sad,
She still has the box it came in.
--- Anon

There was a young virgin named Happ
Who lost it while taking a nap.
She woke up to find,
In front and behind,
Her brother, three Jews, and a Jap.
--- Armand E Singer 456

Young virgins, whatever they do,
Should never say "How" to a Sioux;
A Sioux needs no urgin'
To show a young virgin
How Sioux you-know-what, i.e., screw.
--- Michael Horgan

There was a young virgin named Alice,
Who thought of her cunt as a chalice.
One night, sleeping nude,
She awoke feeling lewd,
And found in her chalice, a phallus.
--- L0805

An intrepid explorer named Jones,
Met a virgin and jumped on her bones.
As they screwed, he drew charts
Of her various parts,
And her private erogenous zones.
--- Peter Wilkins

A young vegetarian, Kerry;
She lived upon nuts and on berries.
But as she grew older,
He boyfriends grew bolder,
And soon the dear girl lost her cherry.
--- Tiddy Ogg

There was a mechanic whose bench
Contained every manner of wrench.
But he'd none in his truck,
For in it he'd pluck
Luscious cherries with tools that were French!
--- Anon

There once was a young girl from Kentucky
Who was still a virgin, and lucky.
She knew not the desire
Charles had from afar,
And he took her cherry did Chucky.
--- Anon

Emotions of fearful complexity
Cause many a virgin perplexity;
But hormones dictate
Her concavity's fate,
As the target of laddish convexity.
--- Peter Wilkins

Beware of the virgin in heat,
For though you may love tender meat,
The hazards, it's said,
Make a new maidenhead
Far too costly a meat for a treat.
--- Grand Prix Lim 212

I ask you now, What could be horrida?
I met, nude, in a Tampa Inn corrida,
A virgin in bloom
Locked out of her room,
So I took her to mine and de-Florida.
--- Laurence Perrine P9206

This is file enl

I love how with kisses you shower me.
I ache for your lips to devour me.
An innocent virgin
I be, but I'm urgin'
You -- Screw me! Debauch me! Deflower me!
--- Peter Wilkins

Travelin' backwards and forward in Time 'n
Working on timin' and rhymin',
Chastity's what I search for.
I'm left in the lurch for
I still haven't found a whole hymen.
--- Anon

An inquisitive virgin named Dora,
Asked the man who had started to bore 'er:
"Do you mean birds and bees
Go through antics like these,
To supply us our fauna and flora?"
--- Grand Prix Lim 313 G1543A

Innocent young Miss Mahoney
Heard that love was a lot of baloney.
But the lass never knew
It was literally true,
Till fed the baloney by Tony.
--- G1582

A sheltered young maid from Berlin
Knew little or nothing of sin,
And her status was quo
For a decade or so,
Till she put up one night at an inn.
--- Lims Unlimited

My hymen was torn long ago,
I found it so hard to say no.
He whipped out his meat,
And turned up the heat,
And I went along with the flow.
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Your first sounds much better than mine,
'Cause my mind was besotted with wine.
I remember the sea
And having to pee;
And my pussy just stinging from brine!
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Some cad poked a thingy in you;
Was it just for someting to do?
Was it done with real feeling,
Or did you stare at the ceiling?
I hope you aren't feeling too blue!
--- Jim Weaver Collection

"Well, I tried to enjoy this sex biz,
And allow for that premature jizz...
But I really must say,
'Twas a high price to pay,
Per the lyrics..."Is that all there is...?"
--- Jim Weaver Collection

Reminds me, my very best shag
Took place in a warm sleeping bag,
At twenty below,
Under three feet of snow,
Where her mom couldn't find us to nag...
--- John Miller

Or was it that warm mossy bank,
Into which we so gratefully sank,
While the bright summer sun
Added warmth to our fun,
In undergrowth otherwise dank?
--- John Miller

Or maybe that time in the cave,
Isabella just wasn't so brave.
She clung to me tight,
Till I made it all right,
While pretending to be her love slave.
--- John Miller

In the steeple that time sure was swell;
We got thrashing and pounding like hell.
'Til a rope from above
Got caught in our love,
And our lovemaking sure rang the bell
--- John Miller

Or maybe that time in my car,
She said, "Johnny, Oh, don't go so far!"
Though I got my way
By the end of the day,
She thought I was her shining star.
--- John Miller

That time through the high chain link fence
At the base's perimeter defense:
Uncomfortable, sure,
But that girl had allure;
At the time it just seemed to make sense
--- John Miller

And there really is plenty to say
For a sweet country roll in the hay,
With a girl who won't snitch
(Though your hides will sure itch
And there's seeds in your hair the next day).
--- John Miller

I didn't try sex in a bed
Until I was comfortably wed.
But even today
Sex any way,
Beats work I'd be doing instead
--- John Miller

There once was a natural prancer
Who earned super fees as a dancer.
To help out a virgin
Who feels nature's urgin',
He's willing to be a free lancer.
--- Bill Backe-Hansen P8807

By the process of careful deduction,
The effect is the general reduction,
Of the virgae intactae.
As a matter of fact, I
Believe the correct term is fuction.
--- Anon

I don't even dare to name "B";
Her husband's a friend of mine, see,
Whose bride lacked a cherry;
'Twould piss him off (very)
To learn that she gave it to me.
--- John Miller

I see from your posts, you're a pervy;
A virgin defiler most nervy.
I could tell (good hintin'!)
You're much worse than Clinton;
A scumbag with a bad case of scurvy.
--- MrMalo

Quitting I don't want to do,
So I guess I can now come to you.
Since you've virgins many,
And I don't have any,
I'm sure you can spare me a few.
--- MrMalo

You're right; these days virgins are rare,
And I'm glad you have plenty to spare.
I wonder, of course,
Just what is your source --
Do you run, by some chance, a day care?
--- MrMalo

A newspaper owner named Fred
Would lure a young virgin to bed
And next day refuse
To publish "The News"
Because the sheets already read.
--- Eos P8502

There was a lewd fellow named Long--
Short on wit but immense in the prong.
He preferred to fuck virgins,
And with his carnal urgin's
He'd helped scores of young ladies go wrong.
--- G1577

Up for rape, the outrageous Lord Spurgeon
Made these comments in court without urgin':
"I concur," court reports,
"I'm no good at some sports;
I once made a hole in one -- virgin."
--- Armand E Singer 946

If you're planning a night of hot sin,
And it's a virgin you want to win;
Then wait for the day
When her Dad is away,
And boff her Mom first...and you're in!
--- David Miller

A lady who overly lusted
Was frequently opened and thrusted.
When the baby came due,
It was female too,
And its hymen was already busted.
--- Anon

It's known as the Wedding Night prayer--
The hymn that the hymen's still there.
As inch-inch you inch,
Was...was that a flinch?
While ear-cocked, you hearken the tear.
--- Irving Superior P9008

There was an old maid named Ewing
Who'd heard many tales about screwing.
For these unknown joys
To be had with the boys,
She thought that this joy needed viewing.
--- Clarence E Boyle P9011

So she thought of a scheme quite uncanny,
As she dreamed of Joe, Frank, or Danny.
Buying ice on the cuff
And when credit got rough,
When he came to collect, offer fanny.
--- Clarence E Boyle P9011

When the iceman his money he sought it,
She offered her ass and he caught it.
Said, "That evens the score."
But she cried, "Oh no, more!
It's two bits a piece like I bought it.!"
--- Clarence E Boyle P9011

A boastful blonde virgin from Boulder
Swore no man or boy had yet rolled her.
She was therefore chagrined
When photos of her sins
Appeared in the summer school folder.
--- Big Little Playoy Lims

Said a girl to a fruit-picker, Schmidt,
"A sweet cherry you'll find in my slit."
Replied Schmidt, up her flue,
"What you say may be true,
But I never have seen such a pit."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0600