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I once knew a woman named Sherry We will write here about the schooner; A schooner is rigged fore and aft; The Spaniards would wear a medallion; There was a young sailor named Peck We hail the famous Yankee clipper, Shed a tear for a WREN named McGinnis, Nick Sharp has just one minor failing: I'm sure, beside yours, mine will pale, Not like, my old friend, Henry Browning, A new girlfriend upon whom to dote, There was an old witch from Timboo The Indians built the first canoe. The casket of Oliver Dote A lusty young sailor named Dan There was a young fellow called Lunt, Eight oars need eight pairs of strong hands; There was a young man from Choptank, An agile young man of Seattle Along the slow rivers of Huntingdonshire,
(Hunts) 'Round here we have too many dogs; In the polder we have here no rocks, While rowing and wearing just socks, In this burg, the cocks aren't so big, In this burg you'll find that most chicks Without oars, a young fellow named Joe While boating, a man of Azores A wandering old Wilfred Scott Blunt A young boatman sailed out on Lough Neagh; A lady from Budapest, Florrie, (Budapest => Hungarian => Hunky!)
The girls' rowing team's coxswain, McGrew, The lifeboat that lay at Torquay The lifeboat that's kept at Torquay Rebecca, a silly young wench, An attractive young girl from up north Her shape is quite beamy, not narrow; Although I"m a weedy young runt, In Oxford, when they come to pole, At trials was a scrubber of name, From the shell came the bids of adieu, I started this trip on a dare; A boy on the Wabash named Hugh There once was a woman named Sue There was a young rower from Ealing There was an old sailor named Tanker, I guess I'm a drip and a droop, Most of you won't give a whoop The millionaire's yacht rode at anchor, A shipwrecked young sailor named Tudder There was a canoeist named Ewing While boating, Tim got in a fix, He looked and with puzzlement frowned, So he stripped to his undershorts blue Then he noticed poor Tim on the bank; A German inside his U-boat Since submarine service began, In claiming it's just a canard The problems in submarine space More potties for feminine parity Since polarization conditions The'd need special counseling, of course, And guys who remain unconvinced New language they'd have to devise They'll need to install a new credo, Recruiters would have to promote When P-C desires to be hip, Anonymous-source expositions
Who had a terrifically big cherry.
Her hole was so big,
You could drive in a rig,
And come out on the great ship Queen Mary.
--- Smitty Minn
I wish that I had done it sooner.
When the weather is clear,
Then she'll leave the pier,
Sailing out to fish for some tuna.
--- William K Alsop Jr
The taller mainmast is abaft.
A sail plan like this
Would be hard to miss,
However you may view the craft.
--- Larry Davis P8712
Each would ride on an elegant stallion.
It's amusing to quip,
In an old Spanish ship,
They'd get thousands of miles to the galleon.
--- Anon
Who worked on the storm battered deck.
As he tried to furl sail,
He was lashed by the gale,
And his boat was turned into a wreck.
--- William K Alsop Jr
Than which there is nothing hipper.
East and west, plied the briny,
'Tween the US and Chiny;
It was great to be a clipper skipper.
--- William K Alsop Jr
Who brought her career to a finis.
She did not understand
The sudden command
To break out the Admiral's pinnace.
--- Anon G0122N
Over work, any day, he'll take sailing.
Now he's over the hill;
He'll sail on until
He sinks or the Trumpet starts wailing.
--- John Miller
But to be fair to old Humphrey Gale,
I think I'd better, quick,
Ask if his friend, Nick,
Is, as we suspect, is a male?
--- Cyber Wizard
Who oft, in small boats, started clowning.
He came to his doom
When struck by the boom.
He's no longer waving, but drowning.
--- Tiddy Ogg
With a nice new Bass Tracker, afloat.
An outdoorsy lass
With a nice, firm, round ass,
(Please send jpg of the boat).
--- Cyber Wizard
Who decided to build a canoe.
One day in the river
She found with a shiver,
"I forgot to use waterproof glue!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection
I don't believe it was the Sioux.
On rivers, stream, and rills,
Liquid paths 'tween the hills,
Where they did their old foes pursue.
--- William K Alsop Jr
Was built in the shape of a boat;
It was launched in the bay,
And it drifts to this day,
Because nobody thought it would float.
--- Cap'n Bean
Had a clever and neat little plan.
He'd find a girl boozin',
Ask her to come cruisin',
And score on his catamaran!
--- Anon
Who went with a girl in a punt.
And while riding, his pole
Caught up in her hole --
Not his punt pole, his front and her cunt.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
The men have long hair and headbands.
The boat shines with wax,
It slides down the tracks,
And over the loosely packed sands.
--- Matthew Montchalin
Whose dreamboat suddenly sank,
When he gave his girl
A necklace of pearl,
She didn't know whom she should thank.
--- William K Alsop Jr
Found fucking in rowboats a battle.
He tried screwing canoeing,
But this proved his undoing,
So he finished his girl with his paddle.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1900
Beneath weeping willows
They lie on their pillows
And murmur their gratified grunts.
--- Harold C Bibby
We shoot them and throw them in bogs.
The 'gators get fat
And not only that,
We raise the most fabulous frogs.
--- John Miller
And you're looking in vain, too, for crocs.
But the girls say it's great
In this place to get laid,
For the boys have extremely big cocks.
--- Dirruk
I spotted some girls on the docks,
And ran hard aground!
The girls swam around
Laughing "We'll help you get off your rocks!"
--- John Miller
And it's action, not size, that they dig;
But that's quite all right,
The hens are real tight,
And the girls can make do with a twig.
--- Dirruk
Are happy with middle-sized dicks
Or even quite small.
If you have none at all,
They're happy to teach you new tricks.
--- John Miller
By the current was tossed to and fro.
So he rowed in despair
With a hoe which was there,
But he found it a hard row to hoe.
--- Albin Chaplin
Switched harlots and tripped over oars.
He fell out and he drowned;
It was thus that he found
That midstream was no place to change whores.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024 P8212
Was wanting a trip in a punt;
But the puntsmen had struck,
So he shouted "Good luck!
-- Your wage is a social affront!"
--- Victor Gray P9002
The wind rose -- he sent out a Mayday!
S.O.S., S.O.S.,
I am in distress;
They found him the very next day.
--- Arthur Pattaffy
Went out in a dory with Cory.
He got into her drawers
While she pulled on the oars,
And he said it was all hunky-dory.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-2048
Knew his ladies were all tried and true;
So he offered these teens
A big basket of greens,
And he said to the girls: "Lettuce, crew!"
--- Anon
No doubt floated well in the sea.
And her coxswain and boatswain
Were especially chosen,
But her history's a mystery to me.
--- Anon
Is intented to float on the sea.
The crew and the coxswain
Are sturdy as oxen,
And as smart and as brave as can be.
--- Anon
This is file edl
Went out on the Thames to catch tench.
When the boat was upset,
She exclaimed, I regret,
A five-letter word--and in French!
--- Anon N
Used a boat to get back and forth.
So proud of her scunt
Thorpe riverside punt,
Was she, so she named it Withforth.
--- Anon
Her mast is as straight as an arrow.
With her Cap'n named Jack,
We are glad to be back
Aboard Nereid, now known as Sparrow.
--- Anon
At Oxford I poled in a punt.
The girl I was with,
Whose boobs were a myth,
Insisted on sitting in front.
--- Archie
They frontwise accomplish their goal.
In Cambridge, you'll find
They pole from behind;
They find it improves their control.
--- Martin Rand
Who possesses notorious fame.
For he likes sixty-niners,
But if his boat had been finer,
He might have been top ten in the game.
--- Anon
As it pulled away with its young crew.
The new coxswain went hoarse
As a matter of course;
Thus ending his rowing debut.
--- LaDonna Jones P8503
'Round the world on my ship, Cirque la Mer.
But my hopes dashed away,
When she sank; now I pray
I'll get home on a ring and a flare.
--- Anon
Asked his boating companion to screw.
While she got a cocking,
The boat started rocking --
The best way to Tippecanoe!
--- David Miller
Who loved to screw in a canoe.
By way of a gloat,
She said, "Nine in a boat,
Now that's what I call a crew!"
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who found ergo tests quite appealing.
But when put in a boat,
Found ergos don't float,
As the coach by his side was soon squealing.
--- Anon
Had tattooed on his arm a large anchor.
And he owned an old boat
That hardly would float.
When he stepped aboard her, he sank her.
--- William K Alsop Jr
I've never been out on a sloop;
I don't know if her aft
Is abeam or abaft,
Or which of her decks is the poop.
--- Lims Unlimited
About the nature of a sloop.
Although larger than a yawl,
They were relatively small,
And were very swift and could swoop.
--- William K Alsop Jr
Next to a very large tanker.
When it discharged some oil,
The yacht it did spoil,
And double-quick he contacted his banker!
--- Arthur Pattaffy
Tied his shirt to his prick for a scudder.
When the mast was erected,
His course he directed
With his thumb up his ass for a rudder.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-2346
Who took a young lady canoeing.
She was playful and chipper
As she unzipped his zipper;
This undoing canoeing meant screwing.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0693
Turning turtle while taking some pics.
Then the boatman cried, "Time
To come in No. 9"
To the upside-down boat No. 6.
--- Peter Wilkins
Because boat No. 9 was aground.
"Oh my lord, it's boat 6
In a terrible fix;
I do hope that poor boy's not drowned.
--- Peter Wilkins
And swam out to the rescue. He knew
It looked horribly grim
When he couldn't see Tim
Underneath the turned-turtle canoe.
--- Peter Wilkins
He was grinning and having a wank.
In a rage, the old boat-
Man could not stay afloat,
And he slowly and tragically sank.
--- Peter Wilkins
Deep in the Atlantic did float.
When it ran aground,
A temple he found,
That glowed in the darkness to gloat.
--- Dennis Maggard
We've deemed it the job of a man.
But lately, say some,
One needn't be hung,
To serve as a submarine hand.
--- Anon
That gals on a sub should be barred,
They're missing the rub,
That gals on a sub
Make service on submarines hard.
--- Anon
Arise between denim and lace;
When corridors tight
Force guys with delight
To squeeze past the gals face-to-face.
--- Anon
Would remedy standing disparities,
But toother features
Of feminine creatures
Can stimulate signs of polarity.
--- Anon
Could hamper fulfillment of missions,
They'd have to devise
For masculine eyes
Some blinders to limit their vision.
--- Anon
On board the new submarine force.
To settle disputes,
They'd have to recruit
Some lawyers who handle divorce.
--- Anon
That gals on a sub is good sense,
Would have to take classes
On working with lasses,
To learn how a gal takes offense.
--- Anon
For orders to not go awry,
And lead to confusion
Or awkward conclusions,
When sailors hear orders to dive.
--- Anon
Revamping the conventions lingo,
So women won't fake
The claim: "my head aches",
When needed to handle torpedoes.
--- Anon
Campaigns to make gals think it haute
To break the taboos
By joining the crews
Who serve on the submarine boats.
--- Anon
Recruiters propose a new script:
In breaking taboos,
The Navy needs you
To serve going down on the ship.
--- Anon
Declared such proposal a symptom
Of hold-over views
For breaking taboos
For service by gals under Clinton.
--- Anon
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