Have you heard of th blonde in Tahoker I played with a lady at Eucher There once were four people at Euchre; A riddler who hailed from the Strand, A card of a man would connect In a strip-poker parlor called Dante's, The curvaceous cutie, Miss Coker, There was a cute girl from Madrid, She gambles, 'cause money's her goal. If poker I'm given to bear, Have you heard the sad story of Pete, (what is a river card? - McW)
In Las Vegas, a maiden named Carol There was a young gal named Ophelia, Her beauty made trees out of stumps. A gay lost his boots in a game The female card players eat grub, I picked up my cards with a blush. My chips were down to a few, The boys in the bunkhouse play gin Last Saturday, challenged to stud, I tried playing strip poker once. I don't play that poker card game. Or else someone gets all my clothes Playing poker, the guys would all stare Playing poker with busty Miss Ware, I've learned that a game of pinochle There was a young girl of Aberystwyth A hand is a wonderful thing; So aces are high, deuces low. You flushed when she showed you her pair. An oil dealer from the state of Kuwait, Holding hands is a wonderful thing; There once was a funny old joker
This is file cpl
With his card-playing friends, Joe Palooka A flush that is royal is tops, A straight beats a grouping of three, When playing draw poker, don't choose 'Twas a long night of poker and gin, A winning poker player named Pete, A strip-poker fiend was Aunt Flo In heaven, explorers were yellin', East-West at strip bridge, in the buff! I once played strip poker with Kate. While playing strip poker with Kate, As the other guys watch, dearest Stiles, Here's a sport with a nice special twist, Have you heard of the babe from Tahoker An impulsive young man from Muskoker At a party we all played strip poker. I folded and took off my shoes. Bill Smithers of Huntington Station Sweet Gwen joined the boys at a smoker, Sometimes (I've got to be pissed,) While playing at bridge, Mr. Hubbell Again, may I peek at your hands? At poker she's oft at her best, Being screwed by strange dude woke rich bitch; A student who hated to lose An earnest young dan from Sri Lanka A tourist in fair Hokkaido A room full of clam shell and slate; Upon losing, Sue cried out in pain, A pale pimply kid told me "Yo! A Go player was from Detroit, In the midst of a heated jubango, There was an old 3k of Roma There once was a young girl from Shoban,
Who lost her first game of strip poker?
In nine months to the day,
She'd a baby, they say;
"Well," she said, "I've discarded the joker."
--- G1726A
And did all I knew for to roochre
But spite of my play,
At the end of the day,
She won and I promptly forsoochre.
--- Rudyard Kipling P8903
They played for mere love not for lucre;
But the noise that they made,
O'er each diamond and spade,
Would convince you 'twas warfare, not Euchre.
--- Rudyard Kipling1889 P8903
"Why is sex much like bridge?" he'd demand;
The answer, though sad:
If your partner is bad,
Well, then you'd best have a good hand."
--- Ed Potts P8508a
With the trumps he preferred to select.
To ensure his successes
With Ritzy heiresses,
He kept his own standard erect.
--- Bill Backe-Hansen P9006
A maiden had just lost her panties.
She blushed, looked around,
And guess what she found?
All the male players were raising their antes!
--- Playboy Mag J F O'Conner
Regrets ever playing strip poker.
When she lost, she soon found
She was rushed bedroom bound,
With seven guys drooling to stroke her.
--- Grand Prix Lim 080 G0552
Who was naughty in all that she did.
She played strip poker,
Until it broke her,
Which made her a popular kid.
--- Anon
But at times, she just loses control.
She hides cards in her bra,
And once, in the raw,
She was found with an ace in the hole.
--- Al Willis P9703a
At D. Parton men like to stare,
Are ready to name,
New rules to the game,
Nothing else beats a big pair.
--- Chris Papa
Who claimed a truly bad beat?
His four Kings and an Ace
Just couldn't keep pace
When a river card brought his defeat.
--- Gary Oliver P9705
Was arrested for wearing a barrel.
She'd not drawn the joker
While playing strip poker,
And lost all her other apparel.
--- Cyber Geezer
Who claimed living simply, would heal ya.
To help you get broker,
She'd play you at poker,
And cards off the bottom would deal ya.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Though I taught her bridge hands, and what's trumps,
When she played bridge with me,
She declared, "I bid three
Of the black things with three funny bumps."
--- Jemstone P0001
Of Gay Poker -- the rules aren't the same.
'Straight' flushes are banned
In the homosexual brand,
And the King -- not the Queen -- 's called a 'dame'.
--- H Myer
While the poker hands cause a hubbub.
Low hands always win;
It's how they cash in;
That's why they attend The Worst Fives Club.
--- Tom Patton
Across the whole room fell a hush;
I'd been dealt four aces
And I was voracious,
But damn it! He had a straight flush!
--- Gary Hallock
So I went shy for a hundred then two.
I was sure my four threes
Would win in a breeze,
But four sevens proved my Waterloo.
--- Norm
With anyone wandering in.
But if they should lose,
They go out and booze --
The same thing they do if they win.
--- Cow Sheep Petersen Rhodes
With four kings and ace high, I smelled blood.
So I raised till the pot
Contained all I'd got,
Then four aces he turned with a thud.
--- Peter Wilkins
The others made me look a dunce.
I wore lots of clothes
(They got most of those).
I'm too old for juvenile stunts.
--- Marlene
Before you think that is a shame,
Consider the fates
Of aces and eights
The dead-man's-hand my life might claim.
--- Marlene
And I have to go home half froze.
You can play for money?!
I don't think that's funny;
Did not know that I could have chose.
--- Anon
At the girl in the halter named Claire.
Though not in the buff,
She managed to bluff;
Took the pot without showing her pair.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun
He announced, as he folded with flair,
"I had four of a kind,
But those aces, combined,
Don't stack up, I'm afraid, with your pair."
--- Playboy Mag J F O'Conner
With Mabel, who's hot, makes me buckle
Down quickly to land
A very good hand,
Which leads me to score when we fuckle.
--- Travis Brasell
Who took grain to the mill to get grist with.
Said the miller's son Jack,
"Here's two friends and a pack,
So we have what we need to play whist with."
--- Anon
Such pleasure and joy it can bring.
But it helps a whole lot
If you hit the right spot
With four aces, some luck, and a king.
--- Friar
All the face cards have value, I know.
Still, when I'm playing poker,
They call me the joker.
And in Bridge, I'm the dummy. Low blow!
--- Mimi
She raised you. (straight up in the air)
Your ace in the hole
Made you lose control.
Poker face? Don't know. Do you dare?
--- Ericka
Was the best that they had in the state.
He was quite good at poker,
Which was good for a broker;
The cards often conclude a deal's fate.
--- Arthur Pattaffy
Much pleasure and joy it can bring.
I held one last night,
With such glee and delight --
Four aces (kiss-kiss), and a king!
--- Friar
Who made his living playing poker.
He lived in squalor
And seldom had a dollar.
Said he, "At poker, I'm very mediocre."
--- Samuel C Smith P9803
Enjoyed poker while smoking his hooka;
He was always behind
Since his threes of a kind
Always lost to the Straits of Molucca.
--- J Maynard Kaplan
A flush that is straight always stops
Four of a kind,
And then you will find
A house that is full hits the spot.
--- Silvia S Crockett P0104
Then two pair's the hand you will see,
Then one pair is tops
For taking the pot,
Or the high card just might be the key.
--- Silvia S Crockett P0104
Poor cards for you likely will lose.
I greatly suspect
If low cards you'll reject,
You'll fare better soon, I'd de-deuce.
--- Gary Hallock
With each redneck determined to win.
When one player dropped,
The game was not stopped,
For they let Rigor Mortis set in.
--- Bob Birch P9806
Was honest and never would cheat.
As he laid down his hand,
He said, "Ain't it just grand?"
Then proceeded to shuffle his feat.
--- Tom Patton P0311
Because she had plenty to show;
She was married five times
To fellows named Grimes,
And said, "A straight flush, don't you know?"
--- Lims Unlimited
Flaring tempers with big egos swellin'.
At their poker games,
All these famous names,
Couldn't beat the straights of Magellan.
--- Tom Patton P0107
They giggled, "We've lost quite enough..."
We cried, "No, not so!
There's still more to go...
If we win, you two shave off your muff!"
--- Tiddy Ogg
My cards: 4,5,6,7,8.
She showed a fine pair,
But had to declare
"I do like a man with a straight."
--- Tiddy Ogg
I noticed I'd gotten a straight.
But just to the six
And Katie restricts
Her folds to those having an eight.
--- Hugh Clary
That game of strip poker smiles,
I'll say, "How d'you do?
I'm sure pleased to meet you;
Your offer is one which beguiles."
--- Anon
One that is not to be missed.
I'll wiggle my hip
Playing Poker called Strip;
First one naked gets to be kissed.
--- Arden
Who lost her first game of strip poker?
In nine months, with a day off,
She ejected the payoff,
Saying, "Now I'm discarding my joker!"
--- Grand Prix Lim 759
Sat down for a game of strip poker.
His jacket and tie
Fell to pairs -- aces high,
And his trousers he lost to a joker.
--- Hugh Oliver 70b
I sat between Cher and Bram Stoker.
When old Brian Clough
Stripped down to the buff,
It was then that I played my joker!
--- Bill Wall
Lost my T-shsirt on two pair of two's.
Next came my sockies,
Followed close by my jockies.
(Makes you think I was trying to lose.)
--- Irish
No longer views life with elation,
Since sexing Miss Clarty
At a strip poker party,
Has resulted in fresh population.
--- Grand Prix Lim 654
Then lost her first game of strip poker.
She gave birth to the pot
In nine months on the dot,
And cried, "I'm discarding the joker!"
--- Larry Wilde
I'll deal for a game of strip whist,
With that rare thing, a virgin,
Who need little urgin',
To go a few tricks, once we've kissed.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Was stung when his wife passed his double,
So he killed her with glee
And the judge set him free
For a passed take-out double means trouble.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-2621
I'll keep my own hand on my glans,
Controlling my aim,
'Cause hold 'em's my game.
I'll 'flop' my spunk 'river' in cans.
--- Anon
When she holds the cards close to her chest.
She was so well endowed,
Other players were cowed,
By her hands very close to the crest!
--- Arthur Pattaffy
How dare you, you son of a bitch!
Undeterred, he just purred;
Fought your ex for his bird;
And I won you asleep at the switch.
--- Esther Koch
Took five to ten minutes to move.
His sensei said "While it's
A tedious practise,
At least it allows me to snooze."
--- Arno and Morten
Was getting the hang of the haengma.
Her stones flowed and surged;
Groups linked up and merged.
She said, "Soon my games'll be in Ranka."
--- Arno and Morten
Begged a wise man, "Just one game of Go!"
Said the learned sensei,
"Being so eager to play
Loses two stones in strength, don't you know."
--- Arno and Morten
A painstaking game was my fate.
We opened debates;
Soon I was in dire straits.
The sense of good shape came too late.
--- Arno and Morten
And screamed, "I never lose! It's insane!
You cheated! You suck!
I just had bad luck!
Then typed: "Thanks for an excellent game."
--- Arno and Morten
Let us play a game of that Go.
I've not played before now,
But I'll give 9 stones and a bow,
'Cause I've read Hikaru no Go!"
--- Arno and Morten
Who thought his fuseki adroit.
The ladder he played,
Left his stones filleted.
His opponent found him easy to exploit.
--- Arno and Morten
I made a hideous dango.
My opponent cried, "Right!
I've got you tonight!"
And danced a gleeful fandango.
--- Arno and Morten
Who always had garlic aroma.
With his bodily smoke,
His opponent would choke,
And promptly fall into a coma.
--- Arno and Morten
Whose dad said,"We're racing to shogan!"
He'd taught her to play
But his edge lost its sway
After she finally bought her own goban.
--- Arno and Morten