He heard maiden's heart thump quicker,
Which only made him rise thicker.
She seized him, my dears,
By both of his ears,
Saying, "This is how I hold my liquor."
--- Chris Papa

While checking the cunt of Miss Drew,
The doctor tried one inch, then two.
Said Miss Drew, without merriment,
"Please forget the experiment --
You can shove in the prick and let's screw."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0118

Nympho Venus, who hailed from Salinas,
Had a thing for a medical penis.
When M.D.'s gave her shots,
It would heighten her hots,
And a doc might then try intra-Venus.
--- Playboy Mag J F O'Conner

A medical student named Proctor
Pretended that he was a doctor;
His patient undressed,
He examined her chest,
Then "up" was the way that he knocked her.
--- Cap'n Bean P0506

The doctor examined Miss Queen,
The dirtiest whore he had seen.
He exclaimed, "I have not
Seen so dirty a twat.
Hold still while I first lick it clean."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0871

They've brought charges against Doctor Gray.
He had sex with some patients, they say.
If he get convicted,
As they predicted,
We'll lose the best vet in Green Bay.
--- P8305X

The doctor, caught diddling Jane,
Said, "Give me a chance to explain.
When therapy sucks,
A few thoughtful fucks
Do wonders for someone so plain."
--- John Miller

To the doc went a lady named Kate,
Her oversize shape to abate.
Said the doctor, "By chance
I've some fruit in my pants --
This banana will gain you no weight."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0836

She ask of the doctor named Ewing,
"Just what in the hell are you doing?"
Well, he asked for compliance,
And claimed it was science,
Without missing a stroke of his screwing.
--- Bob Birch P0511Q

A thorough old doctor named Hugh
Was checking a girl for the flu.
Though she seemed to be well
And as sound as a bell,
When he banged her, she did not ring true.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0204X

There was a young matron from Maine
Whose libido had started to wane.
So she went to a doctor
Who went and upknocked her,
And now she is warmer than rain.
--- Alsops Foibles

A G-Y-N doctor named Dole
Examined a woman from Seoul;
Upon his inspection,
He got an erection,
And screwed her, quite out of control.
--- Cap'n Bean

"Take off your clothes, Mrs. Skinner."
(The Doc had the eyes of a sinner.)
"We'll see what you've got,
So don't be distraught."
"But Doc, do you plan to buy dinner?"
--- Al Willis

A patient of young Doctor Proctor,
Didn't mind when he swiftly unfrocter.
Nor did his technique,
Give her reason to squeak,
Until after she found he'd upknockter.
--- Anon

A kindly old doctor named Grover,
Once said, "I am clearly in clover.
Not being a fool,
I use my own tool,
Whenever I'm probing for ova."
--- Isaac Asimov

He examined with exquisite skill
The call girl who'd come to him ill,
Both downside and skinside,
Both outside and inside,
They each sent the other a bill.
--- Laurence Perrine P8503a

When examined, young Madeline Hamhocks
Was jabbed in the butt by two hard cocks.
She thought she was dreaming
But found from their scheming,
The answer a real pair-o-docs.
--- Fredric Cohen P8308

Then when she had stripped to her skin,
He dropped his own pants and thrust in.
"You see, I've a notion
Reciprocal motion
Will cure this condition you're in."
--- Lance Payne P8305

The doctor some bad news had broke
To the syphlitic whore when she woke
From his pelvic inspection,
With his warty erection --
And her health card he did revoke.
--- Al Chaplin P8604

I know a young medico, Hodges,
Whose penis, I've found, often lodges
In nurses and patients
Who like its dilations,
In curves, twists, and manifold dodges.
--- G0359

A highly-strung lady named Proctor,
Was checked by the cad who unfrocked her.
He said, "You're in great shape."
She said, "Don't stop, you ape!
It's a man I need now, not a doctor."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1380

A harlot in Charlotte named Wade
Was badly upset and dismayed
By her doctor's big bill
Which she's paying for still,
As he knocks off some weekly in trade.
--- Grand Prix Lim 118

The noted psychiatrist, Gluck,
Observed that some ladies were stuck
In the depths of depression,
So with learned discretion,
He taught the old bitches to fuck.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1346

In a doctors' convention at Salk,
"Tits and Ass" was the topic for talk,
But the demo was live,
So they slipped her a five,
Lest as 'sexual object', she'd balk.
--- Thomas A Quinine P8305

She had a date with the family Dr.
When she entered his car, he Unfr.
Going down Moonlight Dr.
Their urge came Al.
So, he dook down his pants and Fr.
--- Ed Wolfert P8305

There was a young lady named Bly,
Whose blood pressure shot up so high,
That she went to a doctor
Who unfrocked and focked her,
And said that her blood was too dry.
--- Limber Limericks

There was an old maid in great pain;
To the doctor she went to complain.
He said nothing was wrong,
But he pulled out his dong
And he skillfully unplugged her drain.
--- Albin Chaplin

Sal was told by her physician,
"Please remember I'm in a position,
My dear Mrs. Leeds,
To take care of your needs,
Up to and including coition."
--- Grand Prix Lim 743 P8305

We doubted the doctor's veracity,
When we caught him astride Mrs. Cassidy.
He said, "Doctor knows best;
I'm conducting a test
To determine her vagina's capacity."
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0305

His huge penis a young gynecologist
Liked to thrust down his patients' esophagus.
"It's not really a cure,
But it feels good for sure.
If they see through my wiles, then I'll stop, I guess."
--- Bruce Thompson

To his nurse said the famous physician
In the throes of illicit coition,
"Though it's getting quite late,
Let the damned patients wait...
Now, assume the knee-chest position..."
--- Grand Prix Lim 696 P8305

A randy young resident surgeon,
Explored student nurses, not virgin.
Sweet love they'd enable
On the O.R. table,
Which brought her big belly to burgeon.
--- Chris Papa

"Nurse Hortense! Please close the damn door!"
Yelled Chief-of-Staff Dr. LeFlore,
"I'm trying to boff!"
So she pushed him off,
And closed the door, just like before.
--- Anon

This is file bnm

The hospital couldn't be worse;
Explained in a short simple verse.
A patient named Guest
Went into arrest,
While the doctor got into his nurse.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0411

The first time it happened it shocked her,
But with arms 'round her waist he had locked her.
With her uniform shirt
Open down to her skirt,
Nurse Ratchett was nursing the doctor.
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0506

They were just getting ready to sin,
With her skirt hem pulled up to her chin.
When she answered the phone
In a businesslike tone.
"I'm sorry, the doctor's not in."
--- Arnie Schoenbrun P0506

There once was a doctor named Proctor
And he was a hell of a doctor.
Things really got worse
When he hit on his nurse --
The verdict was: Dr. Pr. Fr.
--- Neal Wilgus P8305

A horny young doctor named Fife
Sure leads an improbable life.
He daily rehearses
With hot nubile nurses
What nightly he does to his wife.
--- Armand E Singer 384

The holistic proctologist's nurse,
Had lubricants stashed in her purse.
Just in case the old coot
Went up her poop chute,
In that time of the month called the curse.
--- Bob Birch P0511Q

It's fun to play 'Doctor and Nurse'
(Especially when it's perverse).
Doc makes me say 'Ahhh'
As he undoes my bra;
After that we do not much converse.
--- Jeanie Taylor

A buxom young nurse named Nancy,
Had the hots for a Doctor named Clancy.
But it wasn't his M.D.
Which brought her to her knee,
'Twas his willie that captured her fancy.
--- Stan

There was an old lady of France,
Who said to the doctor, "Perchance
Can you cure my depression?"
He said, "Yes, in one session,
And the cure is right here in my pants!"
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1340

Said the lady, after taking the cure,
"Depressions I cannot endure.
Just for added protection,
I will need an injection
Every week, without fail, to be sure."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1341

There was a young lady of Ryde,
Whose sexual feelings had died.
She went to the doctor
Who promptly unfrocked her,
And told her to spread her legs wide.
--- Peter Wilkins

After using his fingers for stroking,
And prodding and prying and poking,
He said with a grin,
"Did you feel me go in?"
She said, "No but my panties are soaking!"
--- Peter Wilkins

Still grinning he said, "Only moose
Have vaginas so floppy and loose.
Your G-spot is worn
And your clitoris torn.
Diagnosis? Vibrator abuse."
--- Peter Wilkins

"If you leave it alone for a bit,"
Said the doc as he fondled her tit,
"And return in a week,
Then I'll give you a tweak,
Just to check on the state of your clit."
--- Peter Wilkins

"But doctor," she said, "I don't use
A vibrator to aid self-abuse.
I find that drilling
Bananas are thrilling,
And carrots I like to misuse."
--- Peter Wilkins

"No wonder," he said, "you feel numb."
As he rubbed on her clit with his thumb.
"What you need for a treat
Is a length of my meat;
A prescrption for making you come!"
--- Peter Wilkins

Remember that lady from Ryde
Who has lost all her feeling inside,
For the numbing woes
Of assorted dildoes,
And the treatmen her doctor prescribed.
--- Peter Wilkins

"Please assure me," she said, "Is it true
That you're licensed to give me a screw?"
And in answer he said,
As he led her to bed,
"It's the ethical treatment for you!"
--- Peter Wilkins

"Well, don't be too rough with me, doc"
She remarked as she lifted her frock,
"'Cause although I'm used
To banana abuse,
My vagina has never known cock."
--- Peter Wilkins

So he started by screwing her slow.
"Do you feel that?", he asked. She said "No.
But I think that I need
You to increase your speed."
So the doctor just let himself go.
--- Peter Wilkins

He grabbed her and rammed it inside
And for ninety-five minutes he tried,
Till he came with a grunt
And said, "How's your cunt?"
She said, "Numb!" And he lay back and cried.
--- Peter Wilkins

"I'm sorry," he said with remorse,
"But I think we should try a new course.
Outside in the stable
We'll see if you're able
To come when you're screwed by a horse."
--- Peter Wilkins

So she tried it with chestnuts and grays,
In a hundred and one different ways.
"Did you come?", said the doc,
As he played with his cock,
While the horses collapsed in a daze.
--- Peter Wilkins

"I felt a small twinge," she confessed,
"When those stallions gave me their best,
But 'twas only a spasm
And not an orgasm."
The doc said, "You'd better get dressed."
--- Peter Wilkins

So sad and unhappy she seemed,
When a thought struck the doctor; he beamed.
He stuffed in her socket
A fireworks rocket
And lit it. "I'm coming!", she screamed.
--- Peter Wilkins

A lady depressed was Miss Crockett;
Each eye was sunk deep in its socket.
Said the doctor, "I'm sure
I can find you your cure,
And I have it right here in my pocket."
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1323

In his pocket she placed her hand bony,
And she said to the doctor, "You phoney!
Can this shriveled up weiner
Reconstruct my demeanor?"
But it grew to a full-length baloney.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1324

"Lie down," said the doc to Miss Crockett,
"I wish to examine your socket."
Then he spread her legs wide
And got on for the ride,
And he blasted away like a rocket.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1325

Miss Crockett's depression was gone;
With a light that was bright, her eyes shone.
The baloney was in
All the way to her chin,
And he fucked her right through until dawn.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1326

The doctor then gave her advice --
One treatment would never suffice.
To insure some protection,
A baloney injection
She must take every week, once or twice.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1327

After having this wonderful tilt,
Miss Crockett had feelings of guilt.
So she went to a priest
Who was hung like a beast,
And he straightened her out 'neath the quilt.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024 G1166

"Miss Jones", said the surgeon, "I see
You're now due for a check-up with me.
Will you show me your minge,
While I warm my syringe;
I'll prescribe this new treatment for free."
--- Anon

Your minor vaginal correction
Is due for a further inspection;
Ah - just as I thought;
It's OK, but you ought
To be given another injection."
--- Anon

There's the case of young Nellie McGrew,
Who suffered the symptoms of flu,
So she wanted to talk
To her friendly old doc,
Who always knew just what to do.
--- Anon