When our thoughts were what's under her thigh An impotent fellow named Fife, There once was a young man from Newcastle Remember the National Geographic What really made Sigmund upset, My dreams, I'm inclined to forget A randy old granny named Ward I know what would make me feel grand; There was a young man from Oswego, As I slept last night in my bed There once lived a young man in Queens, When the girls have deserted your roost, A party-arranger named Brenda There was a young man of Bagdad, She dressed very special for Jack There was an old man from Rangoon, There was a young fellow named Veach, When I was a White House Resident, The succubus constantly schemes I swear this is all too uncanny; The Sultan's favorite girl was Fatima; The Universe bursts at its seams There was a young fellow from Wemyss, Ralph was in trouble knee-deep, The government rationed the shoes, When my girl friend refuses me permission Said a man in the city of Ghent, Her eyes had an intimate gleam; When that cutie tried out for the team, There once was a fellow named Eric Dreams? There's one I can beat -- An amorous fellow named Slade There was a young man of Belgrade
This is file bjm
Ring! Ring! There goes my phone. Ding-Dong! My doorbell then sounded As you'd guess I quickly obliged I lowered her onto my bed, It was all that she was wearing ...If my neighbors should overhear Sweet Carol, I've fallen so quick, When sex with my wife isn't good, Kate Hepburn peeps on from the side, Madonna's buttfucking the brake; Vera Miles and Betty Hutton But all things must end and alas, As the evening is getting quite late While drawing to keep from my mind Now the ink's growing pale! Does it seem At the drawingboard's foot, I drop down Some time later, recovering my mind A Swiss girl so eager to please Her thighs were all covered with cream, The queerest of dreams came last night. Was this a night-ass-fucking-mare? I think that my mind's playing tricks, They all are nice girls in my dreams, And they chase me out into the streets, Last night in my slumber I yearned I've taken a very cold shower Instead of cold water immersion The sun is shining in my room; I think I'm in the sun too long, Yes, it's a tongue coming after me; Ouch! With a bang I hit the floor. Thrill me great stud, once again; When I fly septegenerian banners, I travel to work in a train,
And our peckers would pressure our fly;
And the dreams that were choice
Were the dreams that were moist.
How the days of our youth hurry by.
--- Irving Superior P9607
Had little to do with his wife.
She dreamt in her slumbers
Of giant cucumbers,
Which greatly enhanced her love life.
--- G2121
Who thought that all sex was a hassle.
He preferred a wet dream,
'Cause then he could cream,
With none of the foreplay or wrassle.
--- Archie
When boys leered at bosoms from Afric?
Then under the pillows,
Those bosomy billows,
In hopes of a dream pornographic.
--- Irving Superior P8502
The sex that young SIG did not get.
Too many rejections
And wasted erections.
Chap. Ten see: Why Some Dreams Are Wet.
--- Irving Superior
As most people do, I can bet
I recall just a few,
Say, a hundred or two,
Cause they are the ones that were wet.
--- Friar
Cried, "Back in my youth, when I whored,
Life gave me both treasure
And a crotchful of pleasure,
Which I dream about now when I'm bored."
--- G1885
'Tis a wench who could take me in hand
For a roll in the hay.
For the rest of the day
I'd accede to her every demand.
--- Anon
Who fell in love with a Dago.
He dreamt that his Venus
Was jerking his penis,
And woke up all covered with sago.
--- L1267
Strange visions came into my head.
These naked men spoke,
But then I awoke
And I did not hear what they said!
--- Anon
Who came up with the most fabulous screams.
He screamed and he ranted,
For a hooker he wanted,
To complete his most wondrous of dreams.
--- Toast Point
And your spirit's in need of a boost,
As a final resort
You can still get your sport
From a wet dream -- self induced.
--- Ed Wolfert P8405
Was asleep on her own hacienda;
She dreamed of a wiry
Young man in her diary,
And a portly one on her agenda.
--- Lims Unlimited
Who was dreaming that he was a shad.
He dreamt he was spawning,
And then, the next morning,
He found that, by Jesus, he had!
--- L1237
For they were to play out in back.
That night, in her dreams
You could hear all her screams --
LOOK OUT ! It's a full sperm attack!
--- Anon
Who was born by the light of the moon.
He hadn't the luck,
To be born of a fuck,
But a wet dream scraped up with a spoon.
--- L0975
Who fell fast asleep on the beach.
His dreams of nude women
Had his proud organ brimming,
And squirting on all within reach.
--- L1358
I dreamed I had sex with the President.
I told every one;
It was lots of fun;
Till a Starr would shine on my sex event.
--- Frode TP9804
To work it out so that it seems
To a slumbering male
As if he's getting tail,
And in this way induces wet dreams.
--- A N Wilkins P8710
I dreamt her employed as my nanny.
Her buxa I knuckled
While calmly I suckled,
Which played merry hell with her fanny.
--- Anon
Who was known for being a loud screama;
Tried sixty-nine, in his tent,
He came and she went...
He woke up -- the Sultan's a dreama!
--- Anon
With suffering, torture, and screams.
Most creatures detest
Even life at its best,
And the best are most often wet dreams.
--- Anon
Who had most abundant wet dreams.
When his father said, "Frank,
Is it true that you wank?"
He said, "Yes, but too rarely, it seems!"
--- Jim Thorne T9711
For he often talked in his sleep.
The things that he said
Would turn faces red,
And required a two-minute bleep.
--- Edwin J Weinstein
The sugar, and bottles of booze.
But soldiers in trenches
Were dreaming of wenches,
And thinking of unrationed screws.
--- Julia Strawn P8901
To join her in the act of coition,
A water-proof sheet
Keeps my bed dry and neat
In the event of nocturnal emission.
--- Ed Wolfert P8405
"Each morn I wake up in a tent.
All my dreams every night
Are a sexy delight;
Time asleep I consider well spent."
--- Tom Patton
It was great! What a wonderful theme!
In my bed through the night,
I knew not wrong from right,
What a pity it was all in my dream!
--- Arthur Pattaffy
The boys nearly busted a seam.
Though none would deflower
That doll in the shower,
Each had her that night in a dream.
--- Allan R Ottley P8306
Who truly was quite esoteric;
He often would scheme
To fulfill his wet dream,
Of going to bed with Bo Derek.
--- Anon
In mine, I was shagging some sweet
Young beautiful tart;
But I woke with a start.
Wrapped up in a very wet sheet.
--- Cyber Wizard
Had dreams of a wild escapade,
Where he had in pursuit
A young virgin, so cute --
He awoke and he found the bed made.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1903
Who dreamed of a game that he played,
Where he chased a fair lass
And he pounced on her ass;
He awoke and he found the bed made.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1836
The sound of it gives me a bone.
I'd hoped it would be
My sweet Carol, see,
But it seems I'll be holding my own...
--- Anon
And I was simply astounded
To open and find
Sweet Carol behind
A t-shirt marked 'I want mounted!'
--- Anon
And carried her gently inside,
Back into my bed
Without a word said;
Muffled tones as our tongues intertwined.
--- Anon
And tore that t-shirt to a shred
As I could not wait
And not hesitate,
For her clothes by her to be shed.
--- Anon
And after tugging and tearing,
I mounted my steed
To fulfill her need;
She whineyed out loud, not caring...
--- Anon
She quite simply was beyond fear.
And at that point I
Let out a loud cry --
"It's a dream -- I wish you were here!"
--- Anon
And for you I have grown heartsick.
I can scarce stand the thought
That I'm here and your not;
We're apart, but not by my pick.
--- Anon
I pretend I am in Hollywood,
Poking my Johnson
In Gloria Swanson,
In my Rolls...Better yet...On the hood!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
While Cher rides the shifter astride.
And Linda Carter
Diddles the starter,
So she can take me for a ride.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
It's not half what she's able to take.
I'm on the dashboard
With Rachel Ward,
Muffdiving on Veronica Lake.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Are both in the back seat sluttin'
With Lucy Arnaz,
In menage a trois lez,
And I may just go stick my butt in.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Not as nicely as Janet Leigh's ass.
So as Barbara Bain
Fingers Marjorie Main,
We come to a stop, out of gas!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
And I'm back in my bed and sedate.
Draw the old girl near,
Whisper in her ear
Mmmm baby, that really was great!
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Last night , I seem hard to find.
In my hand my old ink-
pen is turning to pink
And starts growing! Am I going blind?
--- Anon
To my eyes it is turning cream-
Coloured? Ink's blotting out!
And I feel I'm about
To, er, swoon! Is this all a strange dream?
--- Anon
With my clothes all scattered around.
I can sure feel my boy
With his marvelous toy,
Entering me and then probe to the ground.
--- Anon
On the floor and all naked I find
Me, my pussy a wreck,
Very pleased (so the heck...!).
But my drawings look...Shit! My behind!
--- Anon
Lifted her filmy chemise...
On her tits was fondu,
An hors d'oeuvre impromtu.
Then she mounted me from a trapeze.
--- Ogni Gioia
Her breasts had a sweet honey gleam.
But too good to be true,
This sex cordon bleu;
He awoke with two spurts from his dream.
--- Ogni Gioia
I speelunked a cave, dark and tight.
Great stinking stalagmites
And skin-burning bat bites,
Soon had me cold-sweating with fright.
--- Anon
I woke with a start and a scare:
An earth-quaking spasm
Had squeezed from the chasm
Both me and a sticky brown bear.
--- Anon
For I dream each night in limericks,
Of the girls who here rhyme,
Naked, lying in line
And from one to the other, it flicks.
--- Jack
With skin just like peaches and cream,
Till they part the red lips
'Neath their child-bearing hips,
Then they change, become sluttish, obscene...
--- Jack
Where I'm assaulted and battered by teats.
Then I find when I wake
That I lie in a lake,
For I've just creamed my crop in the sheets.
--- Jack
For the pussy of Kate who has spurned
Me and fell out of bed
In mid-dream on my head,
But despite that my thoughts have returned.
--- Anon
With the water-spray on at full power.
The effect on my dong
Though didn't last very long;
Maybe less than one-tenth of an hour.
--- Anon
I need, for my mind, a diversion;
But all of my thoughts
Involve bedroom-type sports
And a certain delightful insertion.
--- Anon
It takes away the wintry gloom.
But what is this?
Something's amiss.
My old PC has started to bloom.
--- Tjarda Van Den Berg
Or else lenses were put in wrong.
Strange things do I see
Right in front of me.
I think it is a mile-long tongue.
--- Tjarda Van Den Berg
It's aiming for my clit decidedly.
Ok, I won't fight
This wet sweet delight.
Delivered am I from misery.
--- Tjarda Van Den Berg
I'm awake, someone's at the door.
It's here the dream stops,
But still my heart throbs,
Still unsatisfied, wanting more.
--- Tjarda Van Den Berg
Not for one or two times, but for ten.
My God! she was screaming,
And then I stopped dreaming:
It's no fun to reach three score and ten.
I hope to be quite free of manners.
I'll gnash on my gums
As I pinch nurses' bums,
And root all the saggy old nannas.
Which in many respects is a pain.
But today I sat next
To a girl highly sexed,
Who kept moaning again and again.
--- Peter Wilkins