MORE
There was an old witch, name of Jessie, Beware the green man from Mars. Their fifty pricks, flaccid and loose, She got bored with her own masturbation, A flying saucer which travelled through space On Venus, where love's an addiction, On the innermost Saturnian ring There was a green blob from Venus A half-male descendant of Thaurus An unfortunate space creature named Tapp Mercurians, female and male, I once met this little green man, The Flying Men coming from Jupiter A girl from the twin suns of Xentacles Said the Alien, "This is goodbye!" Our ambassador to Venus, Ms. Abner, The was an alien from Mars Well, I'm from the planet Zanussi; There was a young girl from Barsoom The woman who lives on the moon, There was a young lady of Thune, There was a young lady from Venus, The sex-maddened native of Mars The lecherous men of Altair The Mercurian male, although elfin, I like a trans-stellar hedgehop. A horny misguided Westphalian The ladies inhabiting Venus There once was a fellow from Venus, A Jovian harlot named Dalve The Plutonian male is so small, (Much like you and me, after all.)
There once was a lady from Venus When a spaceship crashed in Decatur, There was a young man from Venus, There once was a woman from Venus, A nympho named Pussy McManus There was a young spaceman from Venus, There once was a Duchess of York, In life, Isaac often would say, A strangely perverted old alien, This man who got off of a rocket, Two monsters who haled from Uranus I remember a time back on Venus Under Venus's blanket of cloud The alien has dicks in his thumbs, The alien's eyes are on stalks, The female has tits on the tips When the best mating rituals are staged, Some aliens abducted me; They don't know my anatomy; Please don't put that thing in my ear. You wait for the climactic ends; But little green men are the best; I hope they weren't Hiftlorss, Marlene. There once was a lad name of Nigel, Seven pounds? Wow, that must've hurt. This week I am seeking a crew I am not nearly up to your standard; We'll drop by and leave you some parts; Before we could vacuum or clean, We purged the whole ship my remotes. I won't write about aliens again. Marlene, though I'm not of this realm, Ask and you will get lims I chat with John Carter of Mars Because of their size (and they're green),
Whose crotch was all smelly and messy.
She enjoyed a good squirm
With an alien worm,
And got staining all over her dressy.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
He picks up Earth girls in bars.
At first they are tickled,
But later he's pickled
Their pussies and packed them in jars.
--- Tom Patton P9606
Are vestigal and without use.
Considered great beauties,
They love to make tooties
From skin-glands that sound like a goose.
--- Anon
'Cause she was a nuclear mutation.
And she had five cunts,
But did six guys at once,
'Cause her mouth was an extra fuck station.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Carried Schmeds (that's an alien race).
When it landed, one Schmed
Stuck out his heads and said,
"Earthling, take me to Linda Lovelace."
--- Michael Weinstein P8606
An orgasm's brought on by friction
Of toes against toes,
Or nose against nose,
And that's what I call science fiction.
--- Isaac Asimov
I found me a very good thing:
She had two good cunts,
And knew many stunts--
For instance, with one she could sing!
--- G2641
Who's body resembled a penis.
It was thirty inches long,
And could be off of King Kong,
But it looked like it'd gone gangrenous.
--- Funny Bone
Met women who shouted, "Don't bore us,
It's bullshit to say
That you master a lay
When you never can manage to floor us."
--- Bill Backe-Hansen P9102
Has a horrible case of the clap.
His tentacles itch,
His antenna twitch,
And he flips where he should flap.
--- M B Spitzler P8308
Whenever they tear off some tail,
Do all of their lovin'
Inside an oven,
And think of us Earthlings as frail.
--- Brian W Aldiss G2627
Who did this weird thing with his hand
Up my girlfriend's dress.
He screamed "What a mess.
Need acid to get this off my hand!"
--- Andrew TP9804
Have sexual habits far stupider
Than ours when we're shady:
Their way with a lady
Is nothing but looping-the-loopiter.
--- G2606
Was attacked by a thing with six tentacles.
It was big as a moose
But she promptly got loose
By kicking it right in the gentacles.
--- G2653
And it left without telling me why.
But "It" was a "her"
And there's lavender fur
Caught up in the teeth of my fly.
--- John Miller 0353
Hoped the lesbian Veenies would be havin' her.
But to her surprise
They crossed all six thighs,
While the masculine Weenies were grabbin' her.
--- G2565
Who loved to try on ladies bras.
It was a fetish he had
Since he was a wee lad,
And he liked to hang round in gay bars.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
I left there 'cause the girls were too choosy.
But down here on Earth,
Of girls there's no dearth,
Who never refuse juicy pussy.
--- Anon
Who took a Thark up to her room.
He was three times her size,
And proportioned likewise,
But in no time she lowered his boom.
--- G2573
Is still cherishing the balloon
Of an earthling who'd come,
And given her some,
But had dribbled away all too soon.
--- L0325
Who was blocked by the man in the Moon.
"Well, it has been great fun,"
She remarked when he'd done,
"But I'm sorry you came quite so soon."
--- Norman Douglas L0338
Who came here to find her a penis.
She's tired of fusion
With the male Venutian'
Who's not one to care about cleanness.
--- MrMalo
Don't make out with women in cars.
Instead, it's their custom
To rush in and bust 'em
On the floors of cafes and in bars.
--- G2628
Fuck sitting upright in a chair.
So when you are seated
And joyously greeted--
Beware, Earth woman, beware!
--- G2569
Is unable to thrust all himself in
Throughout the hot season
For one private reason--
A cunt at 2000 degrees Kelvin.
--- G2584
My spaceship is still in the shop.
But soon I'll get weird
With twats multi-tiered,
And pricks grown in vats by the crop.
--- H Welchel
Once tried to make love to an alien.
It said, "Dude, I can't hear,
Get that out of my ear;
Use my nose if you're Q'xxr or mammalian.
--- John Miller
Have signaled us saying they've seen us.
They add, "There's a yen here
For getting some men here --
And nothing but space is between us."
--- P8211V
Whose head had the shape of a penis.
Said he, "If you please,
Since they don't help me breathe,
No condoms should come in between us.
--- DSTARK@EZNET.NET
Would smear her thorax with salve,
Then sit on the bed
And pull in her head
And offer her pectoral valve.
--- S Dale P8211
He lives in the vaginal wall
Of his mate. Yes, 'tis so! (He dreams of seductions)
But he likes it, you know, (Wild rapes and abductions)
--- G2595
Whose body was shaped like a penis;
The elephants thrilled
To the way that she drilled
Them and paid her with packets of peanuts.
--- Anon
An alien crawled out of the crater,
Saying, "Let us adjourn,
Take me to the intern,
I'll go to see your leader later!"
--- Observer TP9901a
This is file bal
With a most unusual penis.
It was green and strong,
And seventeen feet long,
And the way that he used it was heinous.
--- Anon V
Whose body was shaped like a penis.
On a dark winters night,
She'll give us a fright,
She'll shag us as soon as she's seen us.
--- Jim Weaver Collection V
Had a very good time on Uranus.
The native male's dong
Is exceedingly long,
So she took them by way of her anus.
--- G2626
Who had a prodigious penis.
Cried his girl friend, "Alas!
It just came out my ass,
And there's still fifteen inches between us."
--- G2650V
Who liked to get off with a fork.
She'd fork every day,
In her hot Duchess way,
Until she discovered the spork.
--- Anon
That fine limericks are ribald and gay.
So when chasing ET's,
At least pause, please, and tease,
Sexy aliens who happen your way.
--- Nanette Asimov (niece)
Made love to a pretty Westphalian,
Who remarked, "Boy, that's neat!
With two tongues on your meat,
You're more fun than an outback Australian."
--- John Miller
Carried eyeballs around in his pocket.
You wouldn't believe
What he had up his sleeve,
Or where he concealed its socket.
--- ML
Preferred to fuck each other's anus.
They said, "Earth girls are cute,
And they're willing, to boot,
But they're not deep enough to contain us.
--- G2648
When a Venusian grabbed hold of my penis.
She gave it a twist
With a flick of her wrist,
And said, "Now let's get it between us!"
--- Neal Wilgus P8203V
That hides it from Earth like a shroud,
Winged people cavort
In sexual sport
By methods of which they are proud.
--- G2580
Which he puts in her ears when he comes.
He keeps them retracted
For foreplay protracted,
And sure gets a buzz when she hums.
--- John Miller
Which jiggle and dance when he talks.
He loves to give kisses
With the part where he pisses,
And leaves a slime trail where he walks.
--- John Miller
Of her tentacles, slender as whips.
When she wants to be kind,
Slips them in behind,
Where the male drinks in small dainty sips.
--- John Miller
You might think they were truly enraged.
But when she sticks her toes
All the way up his nose,
It's a sure sign they're almost engaged.
--- John Miller
They claim they just wanted to see
How my fingers work.
I just missed the smirk.
I'd know not that's where their mouth would be.
--- Marlene
That bit's not my finger, you see.
Those things are my toes;
Wait! That is my nose!
My body won't bend in a C.
--- Marlene
I know I did not volunteer
To be tied in a knot
By some little snot
Who can't get his spaceship in gear.
--- Marlene
You are disappointed, my friends!
I've no more to say
Re: Alien Way,
Or how it was I got the bends.
--- Marlene
They're screwier than all the rest.
They will last all night
If you treat them right,
And feed them with gas that's high test.
--- Marlene
(They've got fifty dicks, but not green.)
If they're who you've met,
I think you'll regret
The pain, as through space you careen.
--- Marlene
Seduced by an alien from Rigel.
To sounds of great mirth,
He later gave birth
To a seven pound tube of KY-gel.
--- Nigel Pendall a
Next time ignore the alien flirt!
But look on the bright side --
You'll be able to slide
Anywhere, with just one little squirt!
--- Kaylin Brandon
To blast off and find something new.
Perhaps you could steer
Or just volunteer
To mop up the semen and spew.
--- H Welchel
I've only just got my new lander.
The crew is a penis
Who claims she's from venus;
We're going out to philander.
--- Karen
If you need gas, we'll save you our farts.
We both are real bitchin'
And good in the kitchen.
Save me some spew, I'll make tarts.
--- Karen
A glitch in our g-force machine
Allowed it to float.
We manned the life-boat.
(Ay! Sticky globs elephantine!)
--- H Welchel
Lo, into orbit it floats!
Along with some grommets,
Spew froze into comets
Whose beauty our tour board promotes.
--- TuttaGioia
I forgot H has the amen.
On alien guys
He is awful wise.
Do you think he is one of them?
--- Marlene
I don't have the space limerick helm!
My special effects?
Just farting and sex.
(And dicks that are large as an elm).
--- H Welchel
About aliens out on the rims
Of this well know space
Or some other place.
(I guess they are better than hymns.)
--- Marlene
While heading outward to the stars.
He know about Tharks
(Their amorous larks).
He shares secrets re Thark boudoirs.
--- Marlene
The rumors contend they are mean.
Don't listen to gossip,
Do Mars on a field trip;
They are the best guys I have seen!
--- Marlene
MORE