MORE
Isn't it great that the snatch has a hole; An oversized girl from Dewitt On his girl a young gourmet named Lissing A finicky young whippersnapper, An electrician's daughter named Haines, A Victorian maiden named Newell (crewel - slackly twisted yarn used in embroidery - McW)
The skin of her body most worn, A chippy who whored in Lake Nash There once were two whores from the Bosphorus, There was a seductive Brazilian There was a young lady from Natchez A Sweet Young Thing from Regina There was a young lady from China, There once was a lady from Pons For diversion my foolish friend Frott, A woman who was not a saint, A dresser of hair named Louise A Lancashire nympho named Lunt There once was a barber from Bundt To brighten up her Christmas nights, But now there's a whole new sensation, Each Christmas when her I unwrap, A widow who lived in Rangoon, The widow who hied from Rangoon While licking the clit of my lover, There was an old maid named Alvina (Cranes and Kohlers - plumbing fixtures manufacturers)
A furnace repairman named Bates More research is needed, I feel. He had a great hobby, did Siever; A trailer-trash slut name of Sue, Said an old Brooklyn whore, Edna Coyle, A lady of leisure called Hope I hope you don't take it to heart A poet by the name of Stone Young Doris used lip balm with aloe, Said Clarence, our family mortician, Said I, "It was there when she died, Dead girls are the subject I'm doing, Said the doctor to sweet little Suzy, Said Suzy, "Don't fret 'bout my yoni, "But doctor, let's check on your finger. Well, good heavens! Here's Petrie Dish Sue! A simple young lady named Sasso All the girls soon will come back to Rue's, Among the West's settlers and squatters If I had a girl named Delores, I sing of a soldier named Pell A naked old girl from Vancouver There lived a young thing in Marseilles They loved to relax in the bath, The shampoo says "keep out of eyes," A precautious jeune fille named Colette, Now the Queen of the Nile's fertile cresent, While shotgunning may be the rage, A novice young man unaware, A tongue-tied man from Fort Worth, I'm dating a guy with two cocks; There was a young lady named Groatwell A horny old bastard named Larry Our teacher of math is a Scot, My organ is quite long and fat. There was a young girl from Des Moines The wife of young Richard of Limerick The genital area of Ann While giving big Bertha her fill Quite a trap has big Bertha of Kent; There was a young lady named Joan,
Without, there's no place for the pole.
It'd blunder and bumble,
When the time came to rumble,
Without ever scoring a goal.
--- Matt King
Wished her cunt was smaller a bit.
Taking alum from the shelf,
Poked it into herself,
But she got the wrong hole, no shit!
--- Laurence Craft
Put whipped cream on where she was pissing.
And on this spot hairy,
He added a cherry,
For that was the thing that was missing.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1274
Had ways so revoltingly dapper,
That a young lady's quim
Didn't interest him,
If it hadn't a cellophane wrapper.
--- L1557
Wore always her three golden chains.
On each was a locket
Wired into her socket,
Her arse, and of course, to the mains.
--- Franbo
Had a box she'd embroidered in crewel,
And maintained on display.
To a viewer she'd say,
"It contains, sir, a clittering jewel!"
--- Playboy Mag Jim Weaver
Stretched, and fluffy surfaces shorn;
'Round a candle it fits.
And the light it emits
Is most bright at the cool crack of Dawn.
Crocheted the cunt hair on her gash.
Said she, "Ain't it silly
To make my cunt frilly?
But it brings in lots more fucking cash."
--- G2395
Who declared, "The men are all for us.
And the light is so dim,
They can't see to get in."
So they painted their privates with phosphorous.
--- G2270
Who tinted her twat bright vermilion.
Admiring her work,
She said with a smirk,
"That cunt, she is one in a million!"
--- Grand Prix Lim 459 G0263
Who embroidered the place where her snatch is.
With limited fundin',
She journeyed to London,
To compare it with Margaret Thatcher's.
--- Clifford M Christ P8302
Possessed a most unique vagina.
When diddled and rolled,
It gave nuggets of gold,
Just like an Old 49er.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Who mistook her mouth for her vagina.
Her clitoris huge,
She covered with rouge,
And lipsticked her labia minor.
--- L1388
Grew a rose-garden on her mons.
It would have been great
But those thorns irritate;
Next time we suggest she do lawns.
--- Kathi Webster
Tattooed all around his wife's twat.
It'd give many pleasures
To view her art treasures,
But only us two view the spot!
--- G2346
Would cover her body with paint.
Her tits she did black,
Her clit she'd shellac,
With a touch of chartreuse on her taint.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
Could stylishly back-comb and tease
A musky muff-thatch
Or perm a whole snatch,
With a perky pink part sure to please.
--- Tiddy Ogg
Has a clever promotional stunt:
When the fog is so thick
That she's lacking for prick,
She burns a red flare in her cunt.
--- G2406
Who'd leave little braids top and front.
He's high in demand,
And all 'cross the land,
Renowned for his shaving of cunt.
--- Tiddy Ogg
She has strung some nice colored lights,
That sparkle and twinkle,
But how will she tinkle
With lights in the crotch of her tights?
--- Travis Brasell
That came with shocking realization.
Those twinkling lights
Brought me to new heights,
Whenever I practice masturbation.
--- Carol
And my cock then I cram in her lap,
Electrical wires
Cause passionate fires
That burn as I get a big zap!
--- Jon Gearhart
Hung a black-ribboned wreath on her womb,
"To remind me", she said,
"Of my husband who's dead,
And of what put him into his tomb."
--- L1522
Was really somewhat of a loon;
And that wreath that she'd got
Hanging off of her twat,
Has since gone to rack and to ruin.
--- Robin K Willoughby P8507
An earring I chanced to discover.
I know it's a fad;
Not saying it's bad;
But I must say I do think less of her.
--- Writerman
Who crouched on the bedroom's best china.
But the Cranes and the Kohlers
Improved on one-holers,
And now she bidets her vagina.
--- G2240
Examined a spinster named Yates.
He thrust up her flue
Like the chimney sweeps do,
And the clinkers he cleaned from her grates.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-1310
So ladies, if such things appeal,
A bottle of Coke
Shaken first should provoke,
Sensations thus. Does this appeal?
--- Anon
I'd call him an over achiever;
He spent countless nights
Besmirching chicks' rights,
Collecting huge numbers of beaver.
--- Armand Singer
Could clean up when her customers were through,
By flushing her box
With full-strength Clorox,
And gargling with flat Mountain Dew.
--- John Chastaine
"I've been at this since I was a goil.
Now I creak and I squeak,
So at least once a week,
I must douche with a quart of Pennzoil!"
--- Ann Gasser P9007a
Once filled her vagina with soap,
And the suds that ensued
The next time that she screwed,
Practically drowned the old dope.
--- Michael Horgan
That she thinks you're coming's a fart.
She says you, you pig,
Said her pussy's too big,
But it's fine when I'm past the used part.
--- Anon
This is file atl
Copped a squat on an ice cream cone.
The resulting deep freeze
That killed all her fleas,
Was the greatest pleasure she'd ever known.
--- Jim Weaver Collection
But, mostly, it was made of tallow.
It said "Rub the wax
Into all the cracks."
Now, Doris lies, frequently, fallow.
--- Anon
"I don't need a grand inquisition,
But why is her cunt
Not there in the front --
Which I'm sure is the proper position.
--- John Miller
But I thoughtfully wrenched it aside
To cover a mess --
From her brother, I guess --
We do have our family pride!"
--- John Miller
But based on the volume I'm viewing,
Forget about girls.
You limmers are churls;
This newsgroup is ripe for a screwing!
--- John Miller
"When washing this part, please be choosy.
Don't use any soap;
Be gentle; I hope
You'll respect it and not be a floozie.
--- John Miller
I'm saving it all for my Johnny,
Who said when he's ten,
He'd try it again,
With a lingam like my brother Ronnie.
--- John Miller
I object to the way that you linger.
Either get the thing out
Or move it about,
Or I rat to your wife, you're a swinger."
--- John Miller
They just steam-cleaned her ring-a-dang-doo!
Now, we'll park in my truck,
With no fear she'll get stuck
To the seat, like with sticky-gum glue!
--- Anon
Would polish her pussy with Brasso.
The reason, I trust --
To eliminate rust
Which ran is long streaks from her ass-o!
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-2278
After maintenance is done on each cooz;
Trav got 'em so sticky,
They'll stall out a "quickie";
They steam-cleaned their ring-a-dang-doos!
--- Anon
Was Bubba, who made some ink blotters.
But there was no ink,
So Bubba, I think,
Was first to make blotters for twatters.
--- Travis Brasell
Whose cunt had a texture quite porous,
I'd smear her with lard
Then screw her real hard,
With Vaseline on her clitoris!
--- CyberCelt T9710
Whose mistress was French (did she smell!);
The night after D-Day
He bought her a bidet --
The course of true love now runs well.
--- Armand E Singer 330
Was cleaning her room with a Hoover.
She vacuumed her cunny,
Which wasn't too funny,
'Cause it took seven men to remove her.
--- Anon
Who giggled when on the bidet.
It tickled her end
'Cause her young plumber friend
Had charged up the pipes with Perrier.
--- Anon
Having shagged there, once and a half.
It was good for his soul,
Slipping soap in her hole,
And rinsing it was quite a laugh.
--- Lyonesse
But not panicing, instead she sighs.
There's no need to worry;
To rinse there's no hurry,
'Cause it doesn't sting 'twixt my thighs!"
--- Lyonesse
Parked her prat on a purple biditte,
And remarked with a wince:
"It is nonsense to rinse
When I ain't even been diddled yet."
--- Grand Prix Lim 981 G1536
If you rub it, appears phosphorescent;
And it especially melts her
If you pop in a seltzer,
And belabor the thing effervescent.
--- Thomas A Quinine P8407
A double ought to assuage
Your sexual desire.
It's a center fire;
Your .410 is in a twelve gauge.
--- Cyber Wizard Q
Had chosen a girl sweet and fair.
What he thought he would treasure
As the seat of his pleasure,
Became the abyss of despair.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-2351
Had a dick with tremendous girth,
He said with a grin,
As he slid it on in,
"I can thee I am not your firtht."
--- Anon
His balls are like boulders, not rocks.
Each time, nothing loath,
He sticks them in both,
So imagine the size of my box!
--- Loretta F TP9802
Whose pussy was big as a boatwell.
When she drew in some air,
And then tied her cunt hair,
She could jump in the water and float well.
--- Albin Chaplin 3024-0463
Found all young women quite cherry.
He once got the chance
To get down one's pants,
And found that a fist he could bury!
--- Anon
But tight she is certainly not.
In fact, we deduce
That by regular use,
We have doubled the size of her twat.
--- Michael Horgan
It's played often and never gone flat.
There's adequate measure
For temples of pleasure,
But not in cathedral like that.
--- Anon
Whose cunt could be fitted with coins,
Till a guy from Hoboken
Went and dropped in a token,
And now she rides free on the ferry.
--- L0151
Complained to her husband, "My quim, Rick,
Still grows in diameter
Each time that you ram at her.
How can your poor tool stay so slim, Rick?"
--- L0186
Will accomodate any size man,
From the wee that cause titters
To the mighty twat-splitters,
That cause screams they hear in Japan.
--- G0237
He panted: "Did you take a pill?"
At this Bertha frowned:
"Can't handle my mound?"
"What mound?", he said, "It's Fanny Hill!"
--- SFA
Don't despair if your todger gets bent.
You just take careful note
And then loudly you gloat,
When it happens to some other gent.
--- Allen Wolverton
Who got all her thrills from the phone,
Secreting the bell,
And receiver as well,
Where you wouldn't believe it, if not shown.
--- G2148A
MORE